thesunishere Posted June 4, 2015 Share Posted June 4, 2015 One of my best friends and I have been playing this cat and mouse game for at least the last six months. We just graduated completed our graduate program and are both moving at the end of the month. I am going home, which is, consequently, also his hometown, and he's moving about 250 miles away from there to pursue a job elsewhere. I've recently realized that this cat and mouse thing we have been doing is more than just that for me; I have pretty strong feelings for him, and it is making this all a but awkward, especially given that most of our mutual friends from school have already moved. We are the only ones left. While we are part of a greater friend group, we go and get meals together (we even have a restaurant that is "our thing"), go out and talk when one of us is angry at the other, and chat online, via text, or via Facebook all day. He has sent some really mixed messages about his interest, but at this point, I'm not really sure if he is. I don't really mind, either, but it's getting to a point where my attraction for him is getting in the way of how comfortable I have been in this friendship. Would it be wise to let him know I feel this way, or should I keep this to myself? I'm afraid I might scare him away if I tell him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted June 4, 2015 Share Posted June 4, 2015 Tell him. Taking a risk and having it not pan out is better than never taking a risk and having regrets. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted June 4, 2015 Share Posted June 4, 2015 Don't tell him. Show him. See what he does. It does scare guys away, even some that might work out sometime if you don't rush them. But if you can't tell if you likes you that way or in a serious way, then he probably doesn't. Link to post Share on other sites
OldRover Posted June 4, 2015 Share Posted June 4, 2015 Agreed on both of the above posts. No downside in letting him know your feelings, however you do it. You can be tactful and do it in a way that's not like dropping a bombshell on him.... Work "toward" him, do you dance? Do you hug, kiss or hold hands.... all of the above can show affection. The kiss on the check could be a kiss on the lips... then some comments about how wonderful it was. It doesn't have to be a quick jump in the sack, but that sure would be a nice ending to a great evening. Mention that you feel great when with him, enjoy his company, and look forward to seeing him. If you're parting by several hundred miles and want to save this relationship, you'll have to figure some planning into the equation. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mystikmind2005 Posted June 9, 2015 Share Posted June 9, 2015 Go back 100 years in time and all you had to do was drop a handkerchief, ,,, and we think we are so much smarter these days! huh. Edit: i guess you could always try dropping a handkerchief and see how well he knows his history? Link to post Share on other sites
StalwartMind Posted June 9, 2015 Share Posted June 9, 2015 Bring on the women that drop handkerchiefs! That made me smile for sure thinking of. There are charming things from the past that have gone lost but I do appreciate those that find it appealing too, even if just somewhat jokingly. To answer the actual question, much like the responses above, there are different opinion. As a guy I would want my friend being honest with me like that, wouldn't scare me away either. Either way you do have a choice to make. Something that eats you up inside is best to let out in a way that you feel the most comfortable with expressing yourself. There are always consequence of some sort no matter what choice we make, but rather end up having acted upon your feelings than suppress them and wonder forever about what could of been. Maybe I just like clarity with, but it also just makes life a lot more easy, east least for me. Best of wishes to you! Link to post Share on other sites
Vick007 Posted June 9, 2015 Share Posted June 9, 2015 I am just curious how long you have been best friends with him? Also how does he show mixed interest to you? Have you two ever had an intimate moment? I completely get the feelings interfering with the friendship at this point. I am dealing with the same issue, while circumstances are a little different. Isn't it hard? For me its to the point where I can't even date and I will always put any plans of potential plans with her ahead of everything else. I wish you the best of luck! Link to post Share on other sites
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