loveiswar101 Posted June 5, 2015 Share Posted June 5, 2015 Hey all. After 3 weeks of solid no contact yesterday i crumbled. Had a really day at work, came home and struggled all evening. Then boom, I text her asking her out for dinner. No reply. The issue is im not sure if its was down to I miss her as been going well the last 3 weeks or just loneliness, more loneliness as waking up this morning i now feel better and still believe we would never work. Big issue 3 weeks was the best ive gone and feel such a fool... Argh.. Link to post Share on other sites
Reels Posted June 6, 2015 Share Posted June 6, 2015 (edited) You should be now interested in something else. These events are memorable, but there is no gain. Edited June 6, 2015 by Reels Link to post Share on other sites
Author loveiswar101 Posted June 6, 2015 Author Share Posted June 6, 2015 What a f***ing mess i am today. I'm a grown man and have been crying all day. My emotions are absolutely killing me today. I don't know what to do, which way to turn ? The pain is just scrutinizing...why can't i just move on, accept her decision. I just wish I could fast foward a year and be done with all, failing that rewind 2.5 years before i met her. How can one person say one thing one time and then be as cold as ice and throw you to the curb like a piece of litter. This woman was in a bad way when I met her, been to more hospitals than can count on my fingers to get her better, all done out of caring and love. Where is the justice in the world. Feel im destined to be alone for the rest of my life, after a 10yr marriage going south and being cheated on and now this 2.5 yr relationship gone, what is wrong with me. Am I just to weak for this world, im honest, kind and give out only love to people. Yet here i am in tears typing this wondering what I can do to get out of this nightmare. I hate this world... Link to post Share on other sites
Arieswoman Posted June 6, 2015 Share Posted June 6, 2015 loveiswar101, I'm sorry you are having a tough time over this. OK so you broke NC. It wasn't a good idea because you have set your healing back a bit. But you know it wasn't a good idea, right? It's bit like giving up smoking - really tough. You may take a few steps forward but then you take one back. Be kind to yourself. Two steps forward and one back is still progress. You have lost something that was precious to you and you need time to grieve. It's natural. If you feel you are being overwhelmed by your emotions have a talk with your GP/Physician. Maybe you could do with some counselling or antidepressents to get past this rough stage? Hang on in there. You can do this. There are many posters on this board who have been where you are now and we have managed to deal with it, and come out the other side. And - there is nothing wrong with you. You had a relationship and it didn't work. You did your best but she rejected you. That says more about her than it does about you. Good Luck x 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Ariess10 Posted June 6, 2015 Share Posted June 6, 2015 Couldn't have said it better myself ^^^^ 1 Link to post Share on other sites
misspond Posted June 6, 2015 Share Posted June 6, 2015 Talking to your GP might be a good idea. If you've never been to talk about feeling low before then (here in the UK at least) they give you a quick set of questions to answer on paper. If you answer honestly then they can make a quick diagnosis and offer some anti-d's that will help. You only need to to take them for as long as it takes to start to feel better and when I did it five years ago I got to a point where I did start to feel better and then I would forget to take the anti-d's and that's when I realised I didn't need them any more. Thing is, the world isn't always a perfect place, and when you've been rejected it's hard to feel good about anything. But you have an important place in it, and you need to recognise your worth. You sound like a really caring and sensitive person, so make sure you get some support. Can you get out with friends? As has been said before, there's nothing wrong with you. You're awesome, try not to forget that. Link to post Share on other sites
aloneinaz Posted June 6, 2015 Share Posted June 6, 2015 My Mom always told me that you have to kiss a lot of frogs to find that princess. How true she was. We've all had our share of rotten relationships with outcomes we didn't like. That's life and we have to have alligator skin at times to navigate through the BS. My GF had a 5 year marriage that was a disaster. Her second husband turned into a raging alcoholic despite her taking him to rehab too many times to count. She finally left him. Her next RS was a guy who cheated on her and went back to his ex.. My point? She's shaken all this bad experiences off and has CHOSEN to recognize that life presents challenges to us all. It's our choice if we chose to turn cynical and negative or dust ourselves off and find happiness again. She's the most positive person I know and is always happy and grateful for the little things in life. I've learned a lot from her as she's simply a great role model. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
brokengirl85 Posted June 6, 2015 Share Posted June 6, 2015 Loveiswar, I think her not replying is the best thing it could happen to you. She is not giving you breadcrumbs or stringing you along, she's not giving you false hope at all! Now you know there's nothing left, she honestly doesn't want to hear from you anymore, she's moved on, and that is clear for you now. You'll be ok. Start counting from zero, and set a 90 day limit. After that time you'll see, you will not want to hear from her or contact her anymore. You'll be fine Link to post Share on other sites
Author loveiswar101 Posted June 7, 2015 Author Share Posted June 7, 2015 Guys Thanks you so much for the quick and warming replies. Arieswoman, thanks you. I know there nothing wrong with me, everyone tells me im beautiful sweet honest loving yet I cant understand why the one woman I actually fall in love with doesn't love me anymore. I phoned her last night (thought might be blocked so just hid number), she told me a friend of mine had text her to say I was struggling and that I had asked him to ask her to block my number. She said she didn't want to but if that was my wishes she would. No wonder ive heard nothing back. She even sent a screen dump of the text. She was straight up honest. We chatted for a few mins and I just said maybe one day were catch up and she said yes when the dust settles. I have no hope for that, i'm no fool and know she was just being polite. This morning few tears but feel better after reading all these kind words here. I've been on meds since break up, seen dr and she good and understands. Probably go back soon see if i can get some therapy going. I have my kids with me this weekend (from my first marriage) Im so ashamed Im such a mess in front of them. Argh. At the moment I just want to be alone and sleep. I feel safe and away from he hassle of life. I wish at time I never met her but we had so much fun and good times together it so hard to let go. Anyhow your words above give me hope and I will endeavor from now to go NC again and try to move on. Thank you all. Link to post Share on other sites
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