Confusion

[Lethalkiss]

Well I met this girl about 5 months ago..

it was love at first sight..so after 1 date..we ended up together

Feelings were strong on both sides..but after 2 months of being together

I had to move to another city,closer to my family

due to a college tranfer that I was given ..it was about 6 hours away from her..

I told her I had to leave ,and although it was too early to make such a decision...she insisted on having a ldr..

she was crying..we both knew it would be hard to keep it this way

but we both wanted to..

 

Well..the night I was about to leave,I was on the train

and I called her for a last goodbye...aand she was out ,in a club..

In spite of that...I thought that every person has their own way of dealing with sad situations...so I didn't say a thing..

 

The first week we talked all the time

on the phone,or Skype

I thought this was really going to work..I was in love with her,dedicated to her..

At that time,she was too...she had told me that,although she wasn't clear about the the <seeing other people too> thing..

She always avoided that conversation...and I didn't want to push things..

I wasn't jealous...and somehow I trusted her..

 

After 1 month apart I went to visit her,but stayed at friends homes cause she lives with her parents..

I was there for 5 days...and we only met for 3 hours in public

She told me that she loved me..I was too blind to see the indifference..I tried to make up excuses for her(she was busy ..etc)

but she didnt even apologise

until I called her

when I went back...

I was in tears..and asked why she treated me this way..

She was like

-I don't think I did sth wrong..you know I love you,but honey we are not in a relationship..we are just two people who chat and hook up,forget about the ldr,let's not label it

this one cracked me..

 

I don't know why I didn't end it at this time...I wanted to let things calm down..I was so confused

Since then ,we talk daily,but not in the day,at nights,just some small talk before bedtime..

she says she misses me

she says she loves me

and she asked me to not flirt with others.

 

Somehow,she always expects for me to be online everytime...we barely talk on the phone because she always is busy

this whole thing is not working for me..

I want to call it quits

but I love her

She is the only person that know so much about me..I thought we had that "thing"..

I cannot imagine my life without her..even those small talks..

but I start to feel this is wrong..

I am always there to pick up the phone..if she calls

and she may be ignoring me for days

I feel like she is playing with my feelings,like she's put me on a hook ,like an alternative or sth

I told her that..and she said that she doesn't wanna lose me

I'm so confused..

I'm in a point where I love her and I wish I'd never met her..

She's made me a wreck..and I cannot move on with my life here..I cannot even study..

 

Do you think I'm wasting my time?

[Torii]

Well I met this girl about 5 months ago..

it was love at first sight..so after 1 date..we ended up together

Feelings were strong on both sides..but after 2 months of being together

I had to move to another city,closer to my family

due to a college tranfer that I was given ..it was about 6 hours away from her..

I told her I had to leave ,and although it was too early to make such a decision...she insisted on having a ldr..

she was crying..we both knew it would be hard to keep it this way

but we both wanted to..

 

Well..the night I was about to leave,I was on the train

and I called her for a last goodbye...aand she was out ,in a club..

In spite of that...I thought that every person has their own way of dealing with sad situations...so I didn't say a thing..

 

The first week we talked all the time

on the phone,or Skype

I thought this was really going to work..I was in love with her,dedicated to her..

At that time,she was too...she had told me that,although she wasn't clear about the the <seeing other people too> thing..

She always avoided that conversation...and I didn't want to push things..

I wasn't jealous...and somehow I trusted her..

 

After 1 month apart I went to visit her,but stayed at friends homes cause she lives with her parents..

I was there for 5 days...and we only met for 3 hours in public

She told me that she loved me..I was too blind to see the indifference..I tried to make up excuses for her(she was busy ..etc)

but she didnt even apologise

until I called her

when I went back...

I was in tears..and asked why she treated me this way..

She was like

-I don't think I did sth wrong..you know I love you,but honey we are not in a relationship..we are just two people who chat and hook up,forget about the ldr,let's not label it

this one cracked me..

 

I don't know why I didn't end it at this time...I wanted to let things calm down..I was so confused

Since then ,we talk daily,but not in the day,at nights,just some small talk before bedtime..

she says she misses me

she says she loves me

and she asked me to not flirt with others.

 

Somehow,she always expects for me to be online everytime...we barely talk on the phone because she always is busy

this whole thing is not working for me..

I want to call it quits

but I love her

She is the only person that know so much about me..I thought we had that "thing"..

I cannot imagine my life without her..even those small talks..

but I start to feel this is wrong..

I am always there to pick up the phone..if she calls

and she may be ignoring me for days

I feel like she is playing with my feelings,like she's put me on a hook ,like an alternative or sth

I told her that..and she said that she doesn't wanna lose me

I'm so confused..

I'm in a point where I love her and I wish I'd never met her..

She's made me a wreck..and I cannot move on with my life here..I cannot even study..

 

Do you think I'm wasting my time?

 

You should be focusing on your studies, but I understand how difficult this situation is for you.

 

 

You think you're in love with this woman - and I'm going to be quite clear with you; 5 months is too soon to really say that you love somebody. At 5 months, you're still getting to know the person and usually you know what they only allow you to see.

 

 

She says all this stuff about you, to you, yet her behavior around you - especially when you were in town, makes all that questionable.

 

 

It doesn't matter what we tell you. You're going to do what you want to do about this. Do you believe you're wasting time on this woman?

[madjac74]

Anytime there is....

 

studies

living with parents

ldr

relationship in the increment of months

 

Yes you are wasting your time.

[Lethalkiss]

thanks for answering..

well I don't know If she's worth my feelings

but I feel like I will be a lot worse if we end this..

I guess I have to speak up...but she is always overreacting when I try to tell her about my doubts..

[TaraMaiden2]

thanks for answering..

well I don't know If she's worth my feelings

but I feel like I will be a lot worse if we end this..

I guess I have to speak up...but she is always overreacting when I try to tell her about my doubts..

 

No, hyou will be a lot better...

Please don't behave and act like a doormat.

She is one of life's takers.

Dump, block, delete, move on.

Honestly, look at what you're doing to yourself, man!!

[coryreply]

Sorry you're hurting like this, bro. Long distance relationships are really tough. Unfortunately, most of the time they don't work out.

 

I like what Torii said, she is saying one thing, but her behavior doesn't match up. Which is a better gauge of her honest and true feeling s for you? Her words or behaviors?

[Torii]

Actions mean so much more than words.

 

Showing somebody that you really care and love, has more gesture and meaning than any words can describe. That's why you usually hear sayings like actions speak louder than words, and why so many happy couples don't constantly say I love you to each other every single day; because their actions - like cooking a favorite breakfast, being supportive etc that really, really impact us.

 

 

Sometimes all you need is a look in their eyes to notice;

 

"Hey.. This is genuine. "