I want vengeance on my ex whom dumped me. Rage. Ideas?

[aloneinaz]

You really need to do some self evaluation on what your core issues are that you're THIS angry over a guy ending a very short 3 month relationship. You're being extremely irrational to say the least. Emotionally healthy people wouldn't become this enraged over something like this.

 

 

Channel all that energy into mining what the core issue with you is so you can navigate the dating world while understanding the risks associated with it (being dumped).

 

 

There are far too many people clogging up our prisons in this country for being rejected or dumped. Don't add yourself to that population.

 

 

You're best revenge is to vanish from the guys life, dust off yourself and keeping moving forward till you meet a guy that loves you for you.

[lonewalker]

if you really shack one of his friends. he and his friend is just going to treat you as one of "those girls" that they will talk about over beer. he isn't going to get jealous.

 

living well and be happy with someone who really loves u is the best revenge.

[HorseLuck]

I think I know the core issue it ties into. No, this isn't my first relationship. No, I did not act crazy around him during the relationship, nor have i ever been the crazy girlfriend. He's actually crazier than me. lol. I'm calmer today. That being said, I don't want to avoid going to the club just because he is there. I actually do regret my mild loss of control at the club, and I hope he didn't notice it because then he'd realize I care.

 

Is it still worth going if I want to show that I can handle a run in, or should I avoid going for now?

[aloneinaz]

I'd avoid going there for now so you can heal. I personally avoided everywhere my ex was going as I didn't want to see her as I knew it wouldn't be good for me.

 

 

You'll get to a point where you will feel like running into him won't bother you but it may take a couple of months.

[biggles6087]

Exs will put you hurt and pain that the way it is but I wouldn't get angry or aggressive it will only put you deeper in be happy with yourself and ignore,no point bringing yourself down to that level its just showing your ex will love it cause its actually getting on your nerves reverse the game by moving on.

[minimariah]

*sigh* Has anyone never felt like a loser for not doing something?

 

i did....... in the beginning.

 

then i felt pretty good about myself for handling it with dignity & class. like, i felt fantastic. i felt superb. i felt "gosh, u really do have an amazingy strong character!" type of feelings. i was feelin' myself. and didn't stop ever since.

 

my best "weapon" was and always will be silence. i'll say Hi to you and give you a nod but that's all you'll ever get if you did me wrong, cheated or lied to me. sometimes... not even that. i'm great at ignoring folks. i'll ignore you so hard you'll doubt your own existence.

 

so don't avoid sh*t. go have fun, give him a Hi or just pretend like he isn't there. fake it until you make it!

Edited June 10, 2015 by minimariah

[BlueIris]

I was that furious with someone once. Maybe try this (hokey as it sounds, it felt great afterwards):

Close your eyes and picture him standing right in front of you, not talking, not able to move. Maybe with the smirk you hate. Get a clear solid picture. Then punch him in the face and keep beating him up, kicking him where it hurts and don’t stop even after he’s on the ground. Be brutal and very physical. I know it sounds awful. Maybe it is. But even though I threw out my shoulder doing it, it purged me of my anger and fantasies of harm, got it out of me, didn’t damage my reputation and it is not a crime. Try not to hurt yourself doing it.

[erklat]

I was also feeling rage that can not be described in

days after my breakup. It was also a short lived relationship like

yours.

 

Some people will do that to you. I was also very careful

and all talks of future and unlived expectations are on her.

I think the rage is because you did the heavy lifting and naturally

expected him to reciprocate.

 

Don't do anything but live an extremely good life.

[DinnerForOne]

i'm great at ignoring folks. i'll ignore you so hard you'll doubt your own existence.

 

I think I'm in love with you

[TunaCat]

OP, you sound extremely immature.

 

So he broke up with you, so what? If he didn't feel that the relationship was right for him, he had every right to end the relationship.

 

My ex dumped me unexpectedly as well. There was no hint something was going on, no hint that he was wanting out. We were in a serious relationship and we talked about marriage a lot. We were in a long term relationship (3+ years)

 

Be an adult about this. You are allowed to be upset/mad whatever, but you have to channel those feelings in a healthy way. Spitting on him or beating him up is very juvenile. And sleeping with one of his friends is ridiculous.

 

Not doing anything shows that you are a classy woman and eventually you'll release that handling things in a classy way is so much better than looking unhinged which is how you would look if you sought revenge on your ex.

[ColdandLonelyinAK]

OP, you sound extremely immature.

 

So he broke up with you, so what? If he didn't feel that the relationship was right for him, he had every right to end the relationship.

 

My ex dumped me unexpectedly as well. There was no hint something was going on, no hint that he was wanting out. We were in a serious relationship and we talked about marriage a lot. We were in a long term relationship (3+ years)

 

Be an adult about this. You are allowed to be upset/mad whatever, but you have to channel those feelings in a healthy way. Spitting on him or beating him up is very juvenile. And sleeping with one of his friends is ridiculous.

 

Not doing anything shows that you are a classy woman and eventually you'll release that handling things in a classy way is so much better than looking unhinged which is how you would look if you sought revenge on your ex.

 

I totally agree with that. The worst I've done since my BU is start a few text conversations (that were reciprocated) and had a little too much to drink one night at the bar and cry to him. His ex wife did everything from track his phone to try to ruin his career. Makes you proud when you can just walk away with some dignity and class, instead of being the one that your ex looks back on with dread and regret. You will have nothing to be ashamed of.

[Sugarkane]

So why does doing the right thing and moving on, equal no apology or remorse. Even years later, if the person screwed you over?

Your therapist didn't exactly sway you away from keying his car, spitting on him, publically humiliating him, and screwing all his friends to get back at him?

 

Get a new therapist.