elaine567 Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 On a side note, have I been the only one thinking of the possibility of the BS's getting together? I know it's way too early for that one, but hey, you never know, it's happened before! I would guess it is almost a certainty, the OP already mentioned it... Hurt, betrayed, angry, and crying together, looking to each other for support, what IS the next step, I wonder??? How wise that is, I am not sure... I think they better hide their tracks... Hmmm... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
sandylee1 Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 To rub salt? Not at all, tough love and a hit of reality is what it is. NOC I really can't understand why you would say this. This is NOT the OPs fault at all . Some people are masters of deception and he had no reason to mistrust his wife. Your post is just cruel and hurtful and there's no justification for it. Many spouses have been betrayed for years, that doesn't make them foolish . You're extremely insensitive in your comments. Why do you choose to hurt someone dealing with such devastation? 5 Link to post Share on other sites
fellini Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 OP - you don't have to take a high road but you have to keep your children's interests in mind. your WW is a horrible mother (deals with a furious husband and a divorce and the 1st thing she does is leave town?!) & you should probably go for primary custody as i believe that will truly be in your children's best interest. as long as it doesn't hurt your kids -- take the "low road" all you want. Not sure where you got this idea from. What OP said was: "They left the car park in OMs car and left WWs car there." I took that simply to mean they left work immediately after being served. Not sure that is sufficient evidence to comment on what kind of mother she is. Link to post Share on other sites
Morro72 Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 "They left the car park in OMs car and left WWs car there." Speaking of which, I wonder if OP had a look in the car. Or perhaps installed some electronics while WW was off with her buddy. Link to post Share on other sites
10thengineerharrison Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 You analogy is very correct, but that is not what I meant. I was trying to ssy that if OP was foolish enough such that he was fooled for 15 years, then that's on him because anyone smart enough would have noticed something much much sooner. Denying otherwise would simply be glorifying OPs WW for being the master of deception, credit of which i'm not willing to give her. Oh I have no problem at all giving the WW "credit" for being a masterful liar. That isn't something the recipient should be proud of, though. All WSs are good liars, at least until they slip up or are otherwise discovered. As I said before this is not to insult OP, but to make him realise that he is also partly to blame that the affair lasted this long. Not to be mistaken as me saying he is to blame for the affair, no just the length of it and how far it went. Nah, the BS is in no way responsible for the lies going on for so long anymore than they're responsible for the affair they're unaware of. -10th Engineer Harrison. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
kgcolonel Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 "WW said to us that her and OM were leaving town for a short time to "sort things out", and OM asked us not to mention anything to the kids and our families until they get back. I refused, I told them that we were going to tell the kids and our families today." I believe I found in LD's detailed update where the WW and OM stated that they actually did leave town...... They IMO are showing sociapathic behavior to say the least. These types rarely express guilt, true remorse etc unless it is in their own best interest....what a same for the kids and LD and for OBS. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
sandylee1 Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 Not sure where you got this idea from. What OP said was: "They left the car park in OMs car and left WWs car there." I took that simply to mean they left work immediately after being served. Not sure that is sufficient evidence to comment on what kind of mother she is. They did leave own and LD said it in his update, if you read through thoroughly. No good mother lies to her children about who their father is. No good mother causes her kids the devastation they'll go through 4 Link to post Share on other sites
sandylee1 Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 They did leave own and LD said it in his update, if you read through thoroughly. No good mother lies to her children about who their father is. No good mother causes her kids the devastation they'll go through I meant to say that they left TOWN not OWN. Link to post Share on other sites
spanz1 Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 Perhaps the saddest thing is that he will learn from this and not trust a woman again. Thus spoiling his future relationships. yes that is for sure! any man that had a loving trusting relationship with a woman for 15 years, and THEN finds out it was all the worst type of deception on her part.....that is a life changing event. He will never look at another woman again the same way as he used to. Maybe with time and a lot of work he can trust another woman...but even that will not be easy Link to post Share on other sites
Author lifedestroyed Posted June 17, 2015 Author Share Posted June 17, 2015 Hey guys I don't have much time to write a long detailed update but here is a TLDR format: - OM and WW still out of town, they have been radio silent since they left. - the boss contacted me and said they found out the WSs have siphoned about US$280000 over the last 9 years and that they have begun legal action - our lawyer is suggesting if the WSs get imprisoned (which is a 99% certainty imo) then we will have a good chance of winning full custody - families have been told, all of them shocked, my brothers/cousins said "when OM returns, we are going to have a talk with him" and one of them did the slit throat motion with his thumb, so obviously he's a dead man now I fear for his life. - the kids did not take it well at all, they are so furious at OM/WW. To make things worse, them leaving town without saying anything has added fuel to the fire now my oldest wants nothing to do with WW. We have not told them about the paternity, not ready for that yet but my parents know. - OBS and I kissed, nothing more but it was in the heat of the moment and we were both vulnerable. Not sure what to make of it, right now i'm definitely in no position to jump into a new relationship! 9 Link to post Share on other sites
Noirek Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 Everything went as planned for them. They skipped town with the cash and are now enjoying their tropical paradise woth their new last names. Little do they know that someone is after them. Someone who will find them and end their lives! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
cozycottagelg Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 Okay.......... Link to post Share on other sites
autumnnight Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 Wow.... I hope they both get prison time and you get custody. And please, do NOT get close to the BW. It would not be good for either of you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 - families have been told, all of them shocked, my brothers/cousins said "when OM returns, we are going to have a talk with him" and one of them did the slit throat motion with his thumb, so obviously he's a dead man now I fear for his life. I think you have to intervene here, for your daughters' sake. He is their bio father whether you like this or not. To lose him and for them to have no chance to find out about him and know him will be psychologically very damaging for them. It may take them a while to get over the initial shock, but ultimately they will want to know him. Revenge is not worth ruining their lives. Do you really want murder on your conscience. Heat of the moment perhaps, but living with that for life??? I guess the OBS will not take kindly to him being killed either, whatever she is saying now. However mad everyone is with the cheaters, this is should not be a life or death matter. Some sense is required here. 7 Link to post Share on other sites
Noirek Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 Wow.... I hope they both get prison time and you get custody. And please, do NOT get close to the BW. It would not be good for either of you. It is bound to happen. Ever since the comment of them growing closer everyday after less than 24 hours of them working together on this it was apparent. Link to post Share on other sites
understand50 Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 I think you have to intervene here, for your daughters' sake. He is their bio father whether you like this or not. To lose him and for them to have no chance to find out about him and know him will be psychologically very damaging for them. It may take them a while to get over the initial shock, but ultimately they will want to know him. Revenge is not worth ruining their lives. Do you really want murder on your conscience. Heat of the moment perhaps, but living with that for life??? I guess the OBS will not take kindly to him being killed either, whatever she is saying now. However mad everyone is with the cheaters, this is should not be a life or death matter. Some sense is required here. Yes, hold off your family. OM is going to jail, so let him think about it for a good long time. As for your STBEX, she as well is going to have legal issues. elaine567, and a real point. Also, let's say you do get with, or stay friend s with the OBS, her kids would l not like their father killed. So talk to your family and get them to cool it, or get the police involved. Keep in mind " Revenge is a dish best eaten cold" 1947 Link to post Share on other sites
81West Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 It is bound to happen. Ever since the comment of them growing closer everyday after less than 24 hours of them working together on this it was apparent. You're walking a thin line. For your own sake, is it really worth it? Link to post Share on other sites
Davey L Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 For God's sake tell your family you absolutely do not want her throat slit! Nothing justifies taking a human life, and do you really want that even partly on your conscience? And if you and your relatives don't care about her, what about the children? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Noirek Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 You're walking a thin line. For your own sake, is it really worth it? What are you talking about? Autumn night commented for him to not get involved. I was merely pointing out that it is obvious feelings have been devolping from the beginning. Are you a moderater? Did I break a rule? Link to post Share on other sites
Davey L Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 What are you talking about? Autumn night commented for him to not get involved. I was merely pointing out that it is obvious feelings have been devolping from the beginning. Are you a moderater? Did I break a rule? I assumed that the comment was directed at LD's update about OBS not at your reply to that update. Link to post Share on other sites
Noirek Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 For God's sake tell your family you absolutely do not want her throat slit! Nothing justifies taking a human life, and do you really want that even partly on your conscience? And if you and your relatives don't care about her, what about the children? Yeah murder would not solve a mess like this. As was said they would be going to jail and could not get custody. It would never undo what was done. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Noirek Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 I assumed that the comment was directed at LD's update about OBS not at your reply to that update. Ah, that makes sense. Link to post Share on other sites
81West Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 What are you talking about? Autumn night commented for him to not get involved. I was merely pointing out that it is obvious feelings have been devolping from the beginning. Are you a moderater? Did I break a rule? Ha. I'd be the world's worst moderator. I love the bedlam in unmoderated forums, as long as nobody is being hurt. But Loveshack is strictly moderated, and that's a very wise thing given the sensitivities. But people aren't stupid, you know? I enjoy your posts and I'd hate to see you amuse yourself right to a suspension. Link to post Share on other sites
Morro72 Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 It sounds like if WW+OM come back it will be in the back seat of a police car. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
loveflower Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 - families have been told, all of them shocked, my brothers/cousins said "when OM returns, we are going to have a talk with him" and one of them did the slit throat motion with his thumb, so obviously he's a dead man now I fear for his life. Please don't let your family to do that, even OM is despicable, but after all he is the bio father of your beloved kids...so for the sake of your kids... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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