What to do if you have NO ATTRACTION toward your spouse?

[Mom4]

Good day to you to

 

I suppose you feel better now

 

I was a bit traumatized. I CHOSE to have our daughter. I am glad I did and I got married a year later.

 

We were married and wanted to be a family. Probably no more religious than you. Just doing the best we could with what we knew at the time. You know what you can do with that cross

 

I NEVER said I have a problem being a mother or parent .... I don't regret any of my children.

 

To say that I am looking for advice to kill my H is cruel and hateful.

 

I AM LOOKING FOR SOMEONE OUT THERE WHO MIGHT HAVE REACHED THE POINT OF LEAVING AND THEN FINALLY THE PERSON YOU ARE LEAVING "WAKES UP" BUT YOUR HEART,MIND,SOUL IS DAMAGED AND BROKEN AND YOU ARE HAVING TROUBLE COMING BACK. DID IT TAKE ANYONE A LONG TIME... I JUST NEED TO KNOW IF IT CAN COME BACK IN TIME and did it take a really long time for anyone?

 

LJ: Thank you for your support and mature philosophy. I think about all that you have said and I want so much to turn that corner too. How long was it before you felt like you could love and trust your H? I know you say it was a simple decision and that you just "did." How long until it felt "real?"

[jmargel]

Mom4, My situation with my ex-fiancee kinda comes from your background. Although we weren't married or had kids we had 5 years between us.

 

I met her and at first things were great. Fast forwarding alot, she was abused by her mom both physically, emotionally and mentally. She ran away from her when she was 18. I was 21. I was thrown into being a counselor for her, something I wasn't ready for. As the years progressed I noticed that since she didn't deal with her childhood trama, the abuse that she was given, was being put onto me. I would often tell her it's like walking on eggshells with her. One day things are great, the next she basically goes psycho on me. Kinda like what your husband does. Then, the next day or two things are fine again.

 

It was an emotional roller coaster that I couldn't get off. It got to the point where I was expecting her to have a bad day and bracing myself for her wrath. She wouldn't goto counseling for the longest time, until she saw a psychologist at the univeristy she was attending. He started doing "flashback" therapy in which she would relive these moments. It put her through torture. He then recommended she take a break from school, however when she did he then told her he could no longer see her since she's not a student. It just spiraled downward from there. Everything I was fond of about her was gone. She was there physically but it seemed like everything that she had inside her heart was tainted.

 

I was no longer a lover to her, I was a roommate. A bother to her. I couldn't take the stress of it, so I secluded myself from her. I did my own thing and left her alone. The attacks became too much. I wanted to help her and god did I try. But no matter what I did or say it came back to me all twisted.

 

She ended up leaving and 2 years later married my now ex-best friend. That didn't last long, they are in the middle of a divorce.

 

She has come over to me since and talked about us and asked me for my forgiveness. She said she has been carrying all this guilt over the years on what she did to me. That she had to mature and she had to deal with her problems. As I sat there looking at her what surprised me the most wasn't that she was *finally* knowing deep inside the true problem is, that it wasn't me, but that when I looked at her I had no feelings for her. All the deep, true love I cherished so much about this woman was totally gone. When I look at her I felt about the same as I did for a stranger. I think it was because I was starting to deal with my own hurt and to hear those words from her that it wasn't my fault it struck something in me.

 

So I can imagine how you feel. Depression isn't caused by a spouse. Depression is a sickness that can be treated professionally. Although no matter what you do, you can't make your spouse better. You can help them but it's upto them to do this. It's your decision whether or not to move on from this marriage. You deserved to be loved and shown it. Everyone does. You don't get any bonus points in heaven by sticking with a person that you truly don't want to be with.

 

He needs help mentually no matter if you are there or not. He has let something inside him fester to the point where it has become determental to you and him. I feel some resentment from you in regards to what you had to go through these past 10 years. Nothing wrong with that. It's time to start taking care of yourself. Before you can make any rational decisions you need to regain your sanity back.

[cranium]

I AM LOOKING FOR SOMEONE OUT THERE WHO MIGHT HAVE REACHED THE POINT OF LEAVING AND THEN FINALLY THE PERSON YOU ARE LEAVING "WAKES UP" BUT YOUR HEART,MIND,SOUL IS DAMAGED AND BROKEN AND YOU ARE HAVING TROUBLE COMING BACK. DID IT TAKE ANYONE A LONG TIME... I JUST NEED TO KNOW IF IT CAN COME BACK IN TIME and did it take a really long time for anyone?

 

MW was probably close. She told me out of the blue last July that we need to separate. Said she felt I had been depressed and miserable for the last few years. Maybe that was my "wake up" call. I got us immediately into MC and we are doing well now. Turns our she was having an A at the time she asked for the separation. Her heart, mind and soul weren't really participating for the first few months of MC while her A was ongoing. Once I discovered and we both committed to meeting each other's needs, we have made steady progress. It has been six months since I found out, ten since she asked to separate. We have both been working our a$$es off and are committed to rebuilding a more rewarding relationship.

 

MW has said she is feeling good about where we are. She carried a lot of resentment, but also has always had an attraction to me. She has said it has been difficult for her to come back, but to quote LJ14,

 

Once the resentment is put to rest, the tender emotions will often re-engage. However, you state that you NEVER had sexual attraction for your husband, so I'm at a loss as to what to tell you. How can a feeling come back that never existed?

 

If it existed before, it can come back.

[Mom4]

YES YES YES!!

 

For 10 years ( really before that too) he didn't recognize it... it was EVERYONE else. I used to say how can everyone in your life be the problem. He is now medicated and in therapy... he is better... he is a stranger to me. Because he "changed" overnight our Marriage Counselor and my therapist feel that he may just be in "fix it" mode and only doing and saying what will make him appear better ( I hope not). Yes I have been living on egg-shells.. . and I am still seeing some of the old behaviors coming through . For someone who has gone through it I know you understand that these are like trigger points. I suppose I am afraid to completely let my guard down .. I have already been hurt sooo much. There are soo many situations that happened that I can't even write them down here.

 

The situation is different in that we have children and I married this man. He is my husband. I do feel for him and his pain. It's just hard when you are the one who has been the target. I do not feel sorry for myself... I am a strong person but fragile at the same time .

 

Thank you

[Mom4]

Thank you cranium.

 

Getting pregnant 5 weeks into a relationship was quite a way to start things off... it wasn't that I was repulsed by him. I was just getting to know him and it wasn't one of those... oh my God I have to have this guy. However, he says it was for him... he regrets not respecting me the "3rd" time we slept together. I believe he wasn't trying to hurt me... just couldn't control himself. I put it out of my mind and moved forward.

 

I really was the one who was trying to build on the relationship and his illness just weighed him down. He says that in the back of his mind he has always loved me and doesn't know how he could of treated me the way he did.

 

It really isn't about the physical things that much... more about the self-confidence and trust. I feel like I am in a position that I have to try and get to know someone all over again. Easier said then done if you have been hurt by that person ( over and over and over.)

 

Thank you for sharing your story... to hear that you are working your a$$ off too reassures me that it should be this hard.

 

I wish you and your W the best...

[FolderWife]

Sorry about my harsh response. But when I read the first post, it sounded like, "This guy and I were having sex, and he didn't pull out, and I got pregnant. So I was stuck marrying him. Then, he went into a depression. Poor pitiful me."

 

Now that you've written a little more, it sounds like you married a sick person. It was awefully nice and admirable of you to stick it out. Heck...you sound just like me

 

As far as advice, I don't really know, because I've only been married to mine for 2 years, and I really love him.

 

Can you put the past behind you and just....keep trying?

[Ladyjane14]

Originally posted by Mom4

How long was it before you felt like you could love and trust your H? I know you say it was a simple decision and that you just "did." How long until it felt "real?"

 

It was almost immediate, instantanious even. Sudden...like the 'leap of faith'.

 

This sounds kind of bizarre, I know....but it was almost like the resentment just drained away. Like I had been full of it before, and then I was left with an empty spot where the resentment used to be..

 

It made me feel kind of naked and scared, like I had been wearing armor, and knew it's weight because it was familiar....and suddenly it was gone. But I could also feel the lightening of my burden too. It was less that I had to carry around.

 

Letting go of resentment isn't the same as developing immediate trust. So, there you are....wide open with no protection. Hence...The Leap of Faith.

 

I think at that point, I just had to remind myself that he couldn't hurt me anymore than he had ALREADY hurt me. We had reached THE END. And I had withstood it. If it came to it....I was confident I'd withstand it again.

 

If you walk through the fire to pull your loved one out....all that other stuff has to burn away. You just can't do it and hold onto your own safety net.

 

It took maybe six to nine months for me to really trust that he was making good on his word as far as change is concerned. And even now, a year down the pike....I'm on the look-out for the old patterns. The difference is that NOW I know that I'll handle whatever comes my way.

 

You seem to be of two minds here. One, "I want a good marriage and a stable family". Two, "I don't want the husband I have right now". So, you see....something has to give. You're in a state of conflict in regards to what you want.

 

I'm sure you feel like you're taking some flak here. But it's just basically that duality in you that folks are questioning, so don't worry about it.

 

You'll know....when you know. And in the meantime, go ahead and vent away. Just give a 'heads-up' when you're venting and not looking for solutions.

[Mom4]

I accept your apology

 

I want to put it behind me... I wish I could wake up tomorrow and everything be "normal" whatever that is

 

We have so much invested

 

I truly believe that leaving there is a chance I could find a person that brings something to the table and we have a great life but a better chance that I would meet someone and 2 years later guess what... they / we have problems

 

I would like to see H turn it all around... and for me to be the one who can say I was there for it all... the good and the bad... and how much I appreciate the good. I just don't trust it yet... and like I said he feels a bit like a stranger to me.

 

A lot of people say go back to the feelings you had and that is difficult because honestly the first 1 1/2 years was so crazy and overwhelming that we didn't really get to "feel" anything. Like I said before, we did the best we could.

 

I have sort of lived by the old saying... " Life happens while you're planning it." No matter how much control you TRY to have... their are sooo many other factors that come into play that are out of our control.

 

Thanks for the response

[mom2]

Mom4 - I am in a very similar situation. I feel absolutely no attraction to my husband as well and I feel like I am slowly dying iside. We have 2 wonderful kids that I would not change in an instant. The reason I got pregnant with my second was because I wanted another baby - not because of any special attraction to him.

 

I am so sad over this. I told him I wanted a divorce in December. In March divorce papers were filed and today we are still living in the same house and have done nothing with the divorce. We have been in counseling for almost 6 months now and I am so frustrated. Things are better between us as far as our communication, etc. But as far as desiring him, I still feel absolutely nothing. I am embarrased to admit that I see every single flaw he has and am totally turned off at the prospect of being intimate with him.

 

I don't want him to continue to feel rejected and I don't want to stay and force myself to pretend everything is ok too. I am hopefuly therapy works for me - but if things don't start improving I cannot stay married - as hard as that will be on everyone (financially, 50/50 split of the kids, selling the house, dividing the assets).

 

Good luck.

[WithOrWithoutYou]

Sigh. To mom4, but also the others who have said they are/were in similar situations...

 

I'm sorry to hear you had to go through all of that. I know something about this subject, and I do have some thoughts if they are of any help. As for what happened when your first child was concieved, what he was doing was "steaking out his territory", and putting you in a position where you would not be able to leave him, or would feel more tied to him and less able to do so. That is why he raped you. Abusive guys do that sort of thing. Did he consciously think about getting you pregnant so you would be less able to leave him? I really don't know, maybe not. At minimum, it was about power. Couldn't control himself? Nah, more like couldn't stand the thought of not being able to control you and let you know he would get what he wanted whether you wanted it or not. With guys like your H, the woman must be subject to them, and tied to them, fully under their control. The destroying things, fits of anger, having sex with him without intimacy because you wanted to be "a good wife", etc. all track as well.

 

I was loving and gave of myself but he depleted me. After a while I felt like an object ( disengaged from our lives but could still want sex at 2am... felt like he was a stranger to me. )

 

Is he "always right" as well? I bet that is the case. Does he get angry when you argue with him? Some call it an illness, some don't. Narcissistic Personality Disorder is the name those use who wish to call it a mental illness. Those who "suffer" from NPD do exactly what has been described, and drain their partners, getting gratification from keeping them under control, showing anger when necessary to intimidate them, and are generally terrible to live with. Some have even referred to them as "emotional vampires", as they suck the strength out of their partners (they come in both male and female versions), until they feel like their partners are sufficiently beneath them and under their control so that they can feel good about it. There is NOTHING wrong with you, and the fact that he is revolting to you is quite normal, rational, and understandable under the circumstances even if he apologizes and vows to "change" (they all say that too, by the way, usually after an event where they see they are about to lose their victim - usually when she/he asks for a divorce, or starts packing a bag to leave). There is also often a gift involved when they think they may have pushed just a bit too far, and sense their partner pulling out of their sphere of influence, either phsyically or emotionally. Anything to keep you on the roller-coaster with them, because they need to feed.

 

If somebody did what he did, drained their partner, made their partner feel like an object, treated them like crap for 10 years, destroyed whole rooms of the house, did little to help raise the family except bring home a paycheck, and wanted to act like nothing was wrong, I think most people would find that person revolting too, and just because a divorce threat made him back off of all of that (something called the "honeymoon period" in the "cycle of abuse"), you still not being 100% sure you can stay with him and get into him just because he is acting a bit nicer now only means you are an intelligent human being. Still, I recognize that it is very hard.

 

Fast-forward 10 years, and you are thinking what is done is done, and you love your children, and do not regret them at all because you love them so much, but the thought of staying with this man is repugnant to you. THAT IS OK. There is nothing wrong with you! The fact that you love your kids so much is very admirable, and understandable, but it does not logically follow that just because that is the case, it can be really good between you and him, and it still doesn't mean that your guy isn't a piece of crap, or that there is a real future there. Only you can be the judge of that, but do it with your eyes open and if you really do feel like staying with someone like him as just another sacrifice on your part, you might want to think about whether you have sacrificed enough. And if you think "for the kids" is a good reason to stay, you might think about that one carefully as well. The kids will see if you are not happy, and one cannot make themselves be happy if they are not happy naturally. Also, in addition to you being unhappy with him, to the degree his true nature shines through, the kids are learning - always learning...

 

My advice would be to get out unless he has TRULY changed to be 99% some other person than the one who tortured you all those years (only you know if that is really the case, and if you lie to yourself about it, the only one who loses is you AND your kids). Again, they all say they have changed, and usually, it lasts a while, until they revert back to their true nature, and the cycle continues. It is very bad for kids to see a relationship where one spouse emotionally feeds on the other, and divorce, while painful, is a far better option.

 

You also NEED to google "emotional abuse", and see what exactly you are married to. If he will make a REAL commitment to get help for HIMSELF, while blaming none of it on you and admitting everything he has done not only to you, but to the others he has (probably) lied to it about (no more of that 'gee, I forget what I did" crap - he remembers), there is some chance of him changing enough to make living with him something other than hell. But it requires an extraordinary commitment on his part, and on your part. YOU also need to decide if you have simply had enough, and if you really WANT to go through that hell of watching him try to change, and do the whole nice/monster/nice/monster thing over and over again as he struggles with it, even if he really is semi-trying. You may decide you have suffered enough, and if so, that is quite understandable and is a decision that says you have a lot of respect for yourself. If you decide to stick it out, make sure he is getting a LOT of help (no, not marriage counselling, but help for HIS problem), or you will just be kidding yourself. The fact that you are both carreer professionals changes nothing. Abusers come in all sexes, races, social classes, and income levels. The fact that you and he are both professionals will just make a divorce slightly less painful, since nobody will have to want for material things, and matters such as child support will be less trying.

 

Good luck with whatever you decide to do. Keep us posted.

[candamar]

Just wanted to let you know you're not alone in the way you feel.

 

I cannot offer any advice or opinion but i can identify with you greatly.

 

I have posted another thread titled "Feeling trapped in an unfulfilling marriage", maybe it'll raise some suggestions that might help us both.

[Mom4]

Thank you for your thoughts and support. I am tired... I will post later today

[Mr Spock]

The responses on this post are horrible.

 

 

If you have been trying, TRYING, trying for a long, long time and even your marriage counsellor has passed you on to individual therapy, I'd say you've got a half decent arguement for a trial seperation.

 

 

And shame on those who posted that her problems are lesser because he's not a heroin infested pimp renting her ass out for wooden nickels-they're HER problems, and in no way lesser simply because it could be worse.

 

Shame on the people too, who think that just because he's a doctor he's worth supherhuman effort. If this guy worked at McDonald's you would be telling her to kick him to the curb.

 

 

My advice? Try a trial seperation, and date other people. I'm pretty sure that's the only way you'll ever know if you can be attracted to him again.

 

 

OH and shame on people who think she needs to train like a monkey to feel lustful towards her spouse!!! Sometimes the love is just GONE.

[MySugaree]

OH and shame on people who think she needs to train like a monkey to feel lustful towards her spouse!!! Sometimes the love is just GONE.

 

 

 

Spock, I've missed you, girl. And by the way, you're right.

[Mom4]

Thank you again for your support. It is a tough situation. This morning was a good example... I asked him a simple question " So, you are off today, what are your plans?" and I got a very sarcastic response. He left at 8am and I haven't seen or heard from him since. I am sure he is busy but we are just so far apart. We don't connect well and I am not sure that we ever will. Your home is supposed to be a place where you can hang your hat and be yourself. I feel tense when I am home and he is here, even if he is on the other side of the house. I feel more like me when I am by myself with the kids or doing my own thing. I had to go away for 3 days and every time I called there was either a babysitter here or he was sleeping. I don't care if he gets a sitter but when I call over a 4 hour period on a Sat. afternoon and he is still sleeping ( with 4 kids ages 10 to 2 running around) I know that he is still dealing with being depressed . I keep seeing him slip back and forth. When he is trying to be "up" it feels so calculated and thought out that if feels unnatural. I have a hard time responding to that.

 

I tried to walk away a year ago April and I was seriously worried that he was going to completely have a nervous breakdown and either hurt himself of me. SO I backed off and was trying to let him get the therapy he needed to deal. Then, friends, family, and others began to tell me "he is finally trying and you have sooo much to lose if you don't work it out" . So here I am and I feel like the weight of the world is on me. It's a roller coaster ride. Some days we are going through the motions and it seems "ok" then, it just goes down hill and I just want to get out. I just want to go outside and scream because I don't feel strong enough to just make a decision and deal with it . My therapist is trying to get me to figure out who I am and how to make it on my own.

 

I wish that my H and I could just agree to live as roommates and raise our kids and do our own thing. However, it just doesn't work like that I know. He says he loves me and that I am the center of his world. I feel horrible when he says that because I just don't feel that way. He tells me that even though he treated me like crap and was not engaged in this relationship he still loved me. Well, that is not what I was feeling and now I am looking at some stranger who says they love me. The problem is that I really don't even like him. I care about his well being.

 

Sorry for going on an on I am talking off the top of my head and feel all over the place.

 

Thanks again!

[Mr Spock]

You need to communicate your desperation towards him. If you're in a relationship where you don't feel you can leave because he'd hurt himself, that's what can be loosely termed as "emotional blackmail"

 

And do you REALLY want to be married to someone who is capable of hurting you, or your children if things don't go his way?

 

You owe it to yourself to be honest. It's nearly impossible to build love in a relationship where it seems none ever existed. Don't let friends and family coerce you into staying in a lousy relationship. People get divorced for much much less.

[MySugaree]

The problem is that I really don't even like him. I care about his well being.

 

You're not his nurse, you're his wife. Last time I checked there's a significant difference between the two roles. Divorce him, and get him a private duty nurse for home care.

 

As for those morally "perfect" posters who lectured you about staying in an abusive and loveless marriage, they ain't walking in your shoes.

[amy1975]

There is nothing wrong staying married for the kids and money. is he a decent father to the kids?? If so, stay with him, BUT DO YOUR OWN THING. Sleep in separate bedrooms, set your own schedule, treat him like he's a friendly roomate. It doesn't have to be awful. Love isn't required for a functional marriage. Marriage is about property and children. Don't jeopardize it-have a hot affair instead.

 

If he is abusive to you or the kids get out. And if he threatens to kill himself, oh well. Make sure he has a good insurance policy.

 

IF he wants the divorce, make him do the legwork for it.

 

Just ignore him. if he's been this neglectful so far, it shouldn't be hard.

[WithOrWithoutYou]

Originally posted by amy1975

There is nothing wrong staying married for the kids and money. is he a decent father to the kids?? If so, stay with him, BUT DO YOUR OWN THING. Sleep in separate bedrooms, set your own schedule, treat him like he's a friendly roomate. It doesn't have to be awful. Love isn't required for a functional marriage. Marriage is about property and children. Don't jeopardize it-have a hot affair instead.

 

If he is abusive to you or the kids get out. And if he threatens to kill himself, oh well. Make sure he has a good insurance policy.

 

IF he wants the divorce, make him do the legwork for it.

 

Just ignore him. if he's been this neglectful so far, it shouldn't be hard.

 

I have to disagree. Marriage is, or should be, about a lot more than property and children. If that is all that is left, there isn't anything left worth saving. Staying in a very unhappy marriage "just for the kids" is almost always a very bad thing, because the kids see the unhappiness. Also, in cases of emotional abuse or spouses who do not treat each other well or argue a lot, the kids just learn that this is the way a family should operate, and carry it forward into their own lives and future relationships. Also, this idea that you can live with him and cheat on him, is just wrong. You should end the marriage if you are going to do that. Kids may figure that out too, eventually (seeing things that don't add up), especially when the kids get a few years older, and what kind of an example would you be showing them?

 

Based on what you have told us, I think you probably need to get out of this marriage. The toll will be high, but it will not be as high as staying in it, for you, or for the kids. You do not owe him the rest of your life just because he forced himself on you 10 years ago, and then you went along for the 10 years after that. You have a lot of life left, and you should take the rest of it back, especially if you don't even like your husband.

[dad4]

Unfortunately I am in the same spot but I am the dad of 4 kids and my wife pulls away anytime I try to be intimate, a hug is responded by pushing away, kiss is received by turning her head and the chance to hold her hand is met with pushing away. I have tried very hard to have my wife interested in me on a romantic level but no luck yet. After 5 years of being denied any sex. I found temporary pleasure in the arms of another but it was not what I wanted it only made me feel worse and I hated that I had hurt her. She denied even being hurt and stated she didn’t care if I was with someone else.

 

As a husband who loves his wife very much I do, I will tell you, I will keep trying to remind her why I fell in love with my wife and why I send flowers all the time and why I buy diamonds. And don’t argue with her.

 

It is because the grass is NEVER greener on the other side of the fence.

We have been married 18 years and I would not want to ever lose her no matter what she feels like I will now wait because, Love is patient; love is kind

and envies no one.

Love is never boastful, nor conceited, nor rude;

never selfish, not quick to take offense.

There is nothing love cannot face;

there is no limit to its faith,

its hope, and endurance.

In a word, there are three things

that last forever: faith, hope, and love;

but the greatest of them all is love.

 

To have and to hold, from this day forward,

For better or for worse, for richer or for poorer,

In sickness and in health, to love and to cherish,

Till death do us part.

[Mr Spock]

Originally posted by amy1975

There is nothing wrong staying married for the kids and money. is he a decent father to the kids?? If so, stay with him, BUT DO YOUR OWN THING. Sleep in separate bedrooms, set your own schedule, treat him like he's a friendly roomate. It doesn't have to be awful. Love isn't required for a functional marriage. Marriage is about property and children. Don't jeopardize it-have a hot affair instead.

 

If he is abusive to you or the kids get out. And if he threatens to kill himself, oh well. Make sure he has a good insurance policy.

 

IF he wants the divorce, make him do the legwork for it.

 

Just ignore him. if he's been this neglectful so far, it shouldn't be hard.

 

yeah...so she should put her children through the hardship of two estranged parents living together (he still wants to pork her, remember even though it makes her gag) instead of allowing herself to move on and show her children what a REAL marriage is like?

 

The original poster needs to put some geographical distance between herself and her spouse, to go along with the emotional distance. I think this relationship went to hell in a handbasket a long, long time ago.

[Ladyjane14]

Originally posted by Mom4

I wish that my H and I could just agree to live as roommates and raise our kids and do our own thing. However, it just doesn't work like that I know.

 

There's "knowing" it....and then there's accepting it. Is it possible that in the back of your mind, you're still kind of hoping that the "room-mates" plan will work?

 

Personally, I can't imagine how. Even in the rare cases that I've observed people trying it....inevitably one of them will meet someone else and want to move on. Maybe it'd be you, maybe it'd be him....but eventually, there would be a new person in the mix that would cause a shift in the balance.

[mymojo]

Mom4,

 

This is where porn and a vibrator come to the rescue.If you can figure out the days/times when your husband is most likely to want sex you can read erotic stories and look at whatever type of porn that gets you stimulated.When hubby touches you just close your eyes and think about the things you were just reading/looking at.

[amy1975]

or better yet, Mom4 shouldn't have sex with ANYONE she doesn't want to, EVEN her 'husband'.

[Mr Spock]

Originally posted by amy1975

or better yet, Mom4 shouldn't have sex with ANYONE she doesn't want to, EVEN her 'husband'.

 

 

YAY!!!!!!!! Great post.