I'm not sure if I should move in with my boyfriend

[maraljavan]

I've been dating this guy for about 10 months. I'm at a point in my life that I want to have a serious relationship and settle down. I just got accepted to a university and I have to move. I asked my boyfriend to move in with me and he said " OH I don't know about that! it's too soon we have to take everything step by step" so i told him that you are not that serious with me and I got very upset. this whole situation is effecting our relationship.I believe when two people know they are right for eachother why shouldn't you take a step closer..... am I rushing everything?

[LucreziaBorgia]

People can be taking steps closer, but they'll be doing it at different paces. Your regular steps might seem like giant steps to him, and his regular steps might be looking like he is dragging his feet. The key is to understand and accept that he has his own pace.

 

If the relationship is otherwise fine: he treats you well, he is kind to you, your sex life is good, he is respectful and giving, he is emotionally strong - then don't throw that baby out with the bathwater. Just because he isn't matching your pace right now doesn't mean you won't eventually both make it to the same finish line.

 

On the other hand, if he is backtracking with stuff like "I need space" or starts going distant on you or begins to treat you rudely or indifferently, then you can take that as him taking steps: away from the relationship.

 

I guess it depends largely on how your relationship is now outside of this particular issue.

[HoldOn]

Let the man be the leader, that's his role.

 

You're pushing him into something he is not ready for and it's not fair to him.

 

How old are you anyway? 18? Why don't you live independently for a while anyway?