Mount Posted June 13, 2015 Share Posted June 13, 2015 But how come the MM did not say he loves "Savannah2", and "Savannah2" has been stuck with him for over 3 years? How come? I guess he does have more fun with her, as she is his wife and he is choosing to stick by her. He has never told you he loves you, so why do you assume you are that important to him? She is his wife, I guess, you are merely a woman who allows him to have sex with her. I know I am being a tad harsh, but time to wise up here. Else you are just wasting your life and it is difficult to stand by and watch you do so. AND over what? Some guy who cannot keep in his pants. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted June 13, 2015 Share Posted June 13, 2015 But how come the MM did not say he loves "Savannah2", and "Savannah2" has been stuck with him for over 3 years? How come? SHE loves him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Hope Shimmers Posted June 13, 2015 Share Posted June 13, 2015 I've hardly heard from him this weekend because their kids are away so it's just been the two of them so he says he hasn't had much time to contact me because she is around him a lot. So he texted and said just had a minute to check in until she comes back. I said thanks for throwing me a crumb. He probably doesn't even know what that means. Sounds like you are pissed. You SHOULD get pissed. The best thing this jerk could do to you is hurl a few days' worth of horrible insults and false accusations at you like mine did, then trust me, you will get PISSED and see him for what he really is. He is having a "wonderful weekend" with his wife and he waits until she is out of the room to text you. Charming. Well, at least he is honest and didn't sell you a bill of goods about how she already knows about it and approves, like I bought into (anybody have a bridge to sell me??). And yeah you ARE good enough, just like I was. I was more than good enough; he was the coward loser who wasn't good enough. Get MAD Savannah and get this guy out of your life! 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Babs22 Posted June 13, 2015 Share Posted June 13, 2015 The statement should not be, "I'm not enough for him." I think the question should be, Why aren't we enough for ourselves? If we loved ourselves enough, we could just walk away and do what was right for us. Why would we continue to stay with men who are not available to us? Do we not deserve someone who can be there for us and only us? So when will we be enough for us to treat ourselves better? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted June 13, 2015 Share Posted June 13, 2015 He's with her. I'm not enough for him. I'll never be enough for him. This is very toxic self talk. It's better not to say such things. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Savannah2 Posted June 13, 2015 Author Share Posted June 13, 2015 She just posted a lovey FB pic of them on their date day. I messaged him not to contact me and that I don't need this heartache in my life. He hasn't checked it or responded. He's probably afraid to look because he knows how upset I get and he doesntvwantvto deal with the ****storm I give him. His usual response is I'm sorry. And if I tell him I'm done he says I understand. That's all. Link to post Share on other sites
Babs22 Posted June 13, 2015 Share Posted June 13, 2015 She just posted a lovey FB pic of them on their date day. I messaged him not to contact me and that I don't need this heartache in my life. He hasn't checked it or responded. He's probably afraid to look because he knows how upset I get and he doesnt want to deal with the ****storm I give him. His usual response is I'm sorry. And if I tell him I'm done he says I understand. That's all. Savannah2, I am sorry you are hurting so badly, but why would you want to torture yourself like this by looking at her facebook posts? Perhaps it is the reality you need to move on. I know if I saw smiling pictures of my MM and his wife having a wonderful time, I would be ready to end it. Once you do end it, and it sounds like you just did, you need to stop looking at her page. I hope you did mean it when you just told him not to contact you again. If you have been here before, what will happen different this time? Will he say he is sorry and you will take him back, or are you truly saying good-bye this time? Again, I am sorry you are hurting and I hope you can move on. Affairs are pretty unhealthy. Link to post Share on other sites
Southern Sun Posted June 13, 2015 Share Posted June 13, 2015 She just posted a lovey FB pic of them on their date day. I messaged him not to contact me and that I don't need this heartache in my life. He hasn't checked it or responded. He's probably afraid to look because he knows how upset I get and he doesntvwantvto deal with the ****storm I give him. His usual response is I'm sorry. And if I tell him I'm done he says I understand. That's all. I know it is very hard to do this, but if you can... Do NOT allow him to respond to you. If you actually messaged him to not contact you, as you stated above, then also waiting for a response for him is contradictory. Underneath it all, you are still trying to get a reaction. He knows it, he feeds off of it. The absolute best thing you could do, for your self, to re-build who you really are deep down, is to MEAN WHAT YOU SAID. End it. You told him not to contact you. Mean it. Don't allow the contact. You said yourself that when you've told him before you can't do this, he just says, "I understand." Doesn't that tell you something? There is no fight in him. He is simply accepting what you will give him, until you change it. Block whatever means he has of contacting you. Take the reins. I know it hurts. But it will be the only thing that saves you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Red123 Posted June 13, 2015 Share Posted June 13, 2015 She just posted a lovey FB pic of them on their date day. I messaged him not to contact me and that I don't need this heartache in my life. He hasn't checked it or responded. He's probably afraid to look because he knows how upset I get and he doesntvwantvto deal with the ****storm I give him. His usual response is I'm sorry. And if I tell him I'm done he says I understand. That's all. Gently, you are upsetting yourself by visiting her fb. She is his wife so why wouldn't she post pictures of them having a good time together. Neither of them are throwing this in your face and she obviously doesn't know about this A, so she's not posting to show you up. You choosing to fixate on them spending time together and seek out things to hurt yourself should be a good indication to you that you can't handle being in an affair. You should really look at this and determine if you can keep this up. I see that you told him not to contact you but only you know if you really mean that. I hope you find a way to stop this viscous cycle your in. 7 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted June 13, 2015 Share Posted June 13, 2015 She just posted a lovey FB pic of them on their date day. I messaged him not to contact me and that I don't need this heartache in my life. He hasn't checked it or responded. He's probably afraid to look because he knows how upset I get and he doesntvwantvto deal with the ****storm I give him. His usual response is I'm sorry. And if I tell him I'm done he says I understand. That's all. You messaged him not to contact you - which actually means, "Please contact me, I am upset." He contacts you, you tell him off, he goes "I'm sorry, I understand." He thinks: (I can get away with this, and whilst it is a bit of a pain, she always forgives me eventually. It means she cares and I have control of the situation. No panic. The plates are still spinning. Wife very happy - we had a great time - and Savannah2 will get over it, like she always does. Life is good.) You do nothing, as what can you do? Your only card here is to walk away and as you do not want to do that, good old Savannah2 just puts up and shuts up. He resumes where he left off. Until the next time... 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Savannah2 Posted June 13, 2015 Author Share Posted June 13, 2015 Elaine, that is exactly how it goes down. I just don't know how to stop it. I'm so addicted to him. Why isn't him not telling me he loves me enough to walk away?! Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted June 13, 2015 Share Posted June 13, 2015 Elaine, that is exactly how it goes down. I just don't know how to stop it. I'm so addicted to him. Why isn't him not telling me he loves me enough to walk away?! - I know this is comedy, but there is some truth here. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Savannah2 Posted June 14, 2015 Author Share Posted June 14, 2015 Elaine that is hilarious I love it.. Stop it!! Lol Link to post Share on other sites
Babs22 Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 - I know this is comedy, but there is some truth here. Elaine, that was the best post I've read all day. The video is hysterical and so very true. There are many times I'd like to give that exact same advice and other times I absolutely need to follow it. Thanks for the laugh! Link to post Share on other sites
Hope Shimmers Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 - I know this is comedy, but there is some truth here. Ten words... "Stop It Or I'll Bury You Alive In A Box"! Link to post Share on other sites
still_an_Angel Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 Elaine, that is exactly how it goes down. I just don't know how to stop it. I'm so addicted to him. Why isn't him not telling me he loves me enough to walk away?! You're giving him too much of you, he is not even worth half of you. Take control of this situation, it should be in your favour. He is of the mindset that you are always waiting in the wings. HE should be grateful that you have allowed him to be YOUR lover. Don't let yourself spiral down the dark path that there's something wrong with you, he is not worth you doubting your self. ((hugs)) 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Lois_Griffin Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 He says he loves her but enjoys his time with me. He's always done the push pull with me. At first I thought he pulled away when things were good with her. Then I realized it's just the opposite. When he thinks she is happy with him, I hear from him a lot more. When she is giving him a hard time, he feels he has to do damage control and pulls away from me. It's like I'm his little side reward. That's not push/pull at all. He's been honest and told you he loves his wife but enjoys getting extra on the side. You've chosen to provide it for him. Why do you feel he deserves 150% out of life while you only deserve about 35%? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden2 Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 Why do you feel he deserves 150% out of life while you only deserve about 35%? I think you're over-estimating at 35%, tbh... That's generous, by the sound of it.... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 Do yourself a huge favour and stop looking his wife's facebook page. Block her, block him (email, text, instant messenger, all social media). The only way for you to cut him out of your life is stay OUT of his life. No more texts to tell him to leave you alone. You can do that by being silent, do not contact him again. Sure it'll hurt for a little while but you WILL heal and get through this. Link to post Share on other sites
sandylee1 Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 She just posted a lovey FB pic of them on their date day. I messaged him not to contact me and that I don't need this heartache in my life. He hasn't checked it or responded. He's probably afraid to look because he knows how upset I get and he doesntvwantvto deal with the ****storm I give him. His usual response is I'm sorry. And if I tell him I'm done he says I understand. That's all. Savannah - you need to cut him out of your life my dear . You can get whatever he's giving you and more elsewhere. Start telling yourself that you're not a second class citizen, you're not a puppet to strung along and pulled from behind the scenes and believe it . You don't need the heartache and you'll make yourself an emotional wreck , while he carries on merrily with his life . ANYONE who has your best interests at heart, would tell you to be done with him and I would think YOU should have your best interest at heart more than anyone else in this world. Please dump the user . 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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