Mizz Layta Posted June 12, 2015 Share Posted June 12, 2015 when our exes found someone new ,they don't give us time of the day or contact us but we wear from them after sometime down the road when they get dumped or if they are relationship fail. Can someone explain this logic? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SoThatHappened Posted June 12, 2015 Share Posted June 12, 2015 Because you're "Plan B". They once thought they could do better. Didn't work out. They realize what they had and want it back because the "shiny new toy" didn't work out. Their options are temporarily gone so they go for low-hanging fruit. That's when you don't respond or even consider they exist. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted June 12, 2015 Share Posted June 12, 2015 Yep, they have to have sex with somebody and their exes are the easiest to get back in bed with. Link to post Share on other sites
aloneinaz Posted June 13, 2015 Share Posted June 13, 2015 They contact the ex cause they are now single, lonely and horny and their ex is an easy target to be a "fill in" until the next person that rocks their world appears. They don't really want the ex back, they just want to use them for their needs. The person who was dumped and has good self worth and self esteem, flat ignores the dumpers contact or tells them to "f-off and never contact me again". Then you have the opposite dumped who stupidly run back to the dumper to be $hit on all over again until the dumper kicks them to the curb after usually a short time. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Torii Posted June 13, 2015 Share Posted June 13, 2015 Because they're meanies! and want to remind you about what you had with them. Want you to feel guilty that it ended, as an attempt to take them back. Happens all the time. They'll make an re-appearance that benefits them and they're needs. Don't even consider your needs, or feelings. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
ColdandLonelyinAK Posted June 13, 2015 Share Posted June 13, 2015 If you think about it, that situation is all sorts of effed up, because it seems like most of the dumpers who do this have no regard for the dumpee's feelings. They know the dumpee is an easy target, and usually willing to get back together because of their love for the dumper. The dumper doesn't realize that they're hurting the dumpee even further, since most of the time these on-again, off-again relationships don't work. They have no regard for the dumpee's pain. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
foolinlove79 Posted June 13, 2015 Share Posted June 13, 2015 My ex alwaya does this. Doesnt matter if something hasnt worked out or he's got someone on the go. I hate it personally. He saya its cos he wants to stay friends. But **** sake none of my friends have treated me as **** as he has. I think they are deluded. They dont realize the pain they've caused. Personally i think the decent thing to do is **** off after a rs ends. But thata just me Link to post Share on other sites
erklat Posted June 13, 2015 Share Posted June 13, 2015 http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/long-distance-relationships/494820-should-i-ignore-him-if-he-comes-back-around We are talking about this ex? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mizz Layta Posted June 13, 2015 Author Share Posted June 13, 2015 http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/long-distance-relationships/494820-should-i-ignore-him-if-he-comes-back-around We are talking about this ex? Not particularly him.I was asking just in general based on my past experience. I haven't had from this ex so I assume things are going well with his new love.I don't expect to hear from him either way Link to post Share on other sites
BC1980 Posted June 13, 2015 Share Posted June 13, 2015 I've had this happen several times. Two times, it came down to the exes wanting sex. They both started with the usual BS, "hey, how are you. Just wondering how you are doing." Then, it soon became obvious that they were looking for a hook up. One was actually still married and claimed his wife had given him permission to have sex with outside women because she no longer wanted sex from him. Who even knows if that was true or not. The other two times, I think both were fishing for attention. One ex, he was my first love, and we had a long distance relationship. The usual immature, first love type of thing. He contacted me and started an email discussion, and I think it was mainly curiosity/attention. I was long over him by that point, so I did respond a little, which was out of curiosity myself. I don't think there was any harm in that one. In general though, I think exes are usually up to no good when they suddenly reappear. They certainly don't come back for a genuine friendship or for anything in your best interests. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
BC1980 Posted June 13, 2015 Share Posted June 13, 2015 To answer you question of WHY they contact when single again, I think that being newly single is an extremely emotional time. You feel very vulnerable and unloved, dumper or dumpee. Our egos have taken a hit, and we are moving away from something that was a stable, comfortable life. It's only natural to revert to a past relationship at that time because we are searching for stability and comfort after a breakup. Also, it's just plain ego driven. You don't feel desirable after a breakup, so appealing to an ex for an ego hit is common. Also the same reason rebound hookups are common. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Holmes85 Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 when our exes found someone new ,they don't give us time of the day or contact us but we wear from them after sometime down the road when they get dumped or if they are relationship fail. Can someone explain this logic? Mizz Layta, You never appreciate the worth of something till its completely gone. You are never going to appreciate the light, if the light is all what you had in your life, it's only after the extensive period of darkness that you start appreciating the light more. Most of the times our Ex'es contact us for their own selfish reasons, they want to check if they still have a chance with you, so they can creep back into your life. Things are never going to be all rosey and dandy in any relationship, the chances are if they don't stand for something, they are going to fall for everything. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
AJH1982 Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 Because they dont have anythink else to do and they are very selfish! That`s the logic! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
aboucher21 Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 I will admit I have done this. I don't have intentions of getting back with my exes but they are comfort and a distraction from the current pain of a breakup. That is why I have done it in the past. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
JohnsonBaby Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 What if the dumper claims to still have feelings ? Link to post Share on other sites
erklat Posted June 18, 2015 Share Posted June 18, 2015 What if the dumper claims to still have feelings ? Talk is cheap. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted June 18, 2015 Share Posted June 18, 2015 I've never had this happen, but yes, I imagine it's the "Plan B" theory. I've had very enlightening discussions here with men who say that it's always easiest to get sex from an ex than from someone new. This was news to me! I can guarantee you any of my exes would sooner put their dick in a venus fly-trap than ever attempt to contact me again for anything, let alone sex. I imagine for relationships that ended amicably, yes, it can be understandable that an ex might be open. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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