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Taking him back after 8 months of NC?


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Hey guys,

I was dating someone for 1 and a half years and for the last of that year, we were constantly fighting and breaking up and getting back together the next day. He had porn induced ED, couldn't get erect during sex with me but addicted to porn, lied to me about this issue for a long time, was doing things online, and I felt WORTHLESS. I'm a confident person but that time together tormented me and I hit rock bottom.

 

Then eventually I discovered that he made a Tinder profile online, so i assumed he was talking to other girls. Even if he didn't, he made a profile intending to talk to other girls. That's when I realized enough was enough and I put an end to it.

 

He cried, begged, etc to get me back (this happened every single time I tried to leave him) and I know he loved me. I also know he never cheated. But I couldn't stand the pain he put me through especially since I treated him (for the most part) well.

 

We broke up in Dec and in Jan-recently he would text me maybe once a month and I wouldn't respond. He met another girl and they were fooling around for a little bit. He recently came over to my apartment and he broke down, said he misses me, and I took him back.

 

 

Guys, i've been incredibly happy and stress free during the time apart. I, for the most part, have moved on. But seeing his face again brings back all these feelings and makes me question if the reason for our breakup was even a legit reason. I mean, it was just Porn/Sex related, right? That's easily forgivable right? He was always addicted to online things - Porn, webcamming nude girls, meeting girls online... that's how he met his ex and that's how he met the new girl he was fooling around just TWO WEEKS after we broke up (a rebound?)

 

Am I wrong for taking him back? Will this lead to the same problems? Do you think he is still addicted to sex/girls/will he be doing the same thing all over again? Did I make the wrong choice?

 

He says he's changed, he got a better job, started going to the gym, etc. But I will never know if he really did until I try again, but i'm really afraid to have strong feelings for him again. When we together before, I was borderline depressed and stressed out of my mind because I felt unattractive being with him with all these problems. My confidence came back and I am at a happy place... I don't want that to change.

Edited by justbe12
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To be honest...you've already made the decision to take him back!

So, stick to it, make it work, and put your doubts and fears behind you.

They will only serve to complicate your relationship.

Without trust...

 

If he hasn't changed...you'll know soon enough...

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