jay1983 Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 I've heard people say that a lot on here. I usually reply with "bring a pizza and 12 pack" as a joke cause I really don't understand what it mean. So what exactly does it mean? 2
Sassy Girl Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 I've heard people say that a lot on here. I usually reply with "bring a pizza and 12 pack" as a joke cause I really don't understand what it mean. So what exactly does it mean? Where do "they" say that? And in what context? 1
Popsicle Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 I've heard people say that a lot on here. I usually reply with "bring a pizza and 12 pack" as a joke cause I really don't understand what it mean. So what exactly does it mean? Who says that? 1
loveweary11 Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 (edited) Jay, it's an idiom that is connected to making a deal. Maybe not a popular expression where you live. When negotiating or striking up a deal, it's usually done at a "bargaining table" (another weird expression). Not a real table, but picture two business people making a deal at a fancy table. What you bring to this "table" is what you have to offer to the other person, in exchange for what they bring to this imaginary table. To have a deal, both sides should feel they traded what they brought to this imaginary table for something of value on the other side. If someone doesn't bring enough to the table, it means you think the deal is no good and you deserve more for what you are bringing on your side. Example: If I show up with $1000 and you show up with pizza and a 12 pack... as much as I love pizza, I'm probably going to say you didn't bring enough to the table. Same with relationships. People can feel the other person didn't bring enough positive qualities to the table. Edited June 19, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator 4
salparadise Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 It means "they" feel it's not fair that the guy always has to bring the pizza and 12 pack... and women expect it and see it as a perfectly reasonable proposition. 1
Brigit Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 I've heard people say that a lot on here. I usually reply with "bring a pizza and 12 pack" as a joke cause I really don't understand what it mean. So what exactly does it mean? It means the guy feels he is giving more to the relationship than the female.
PrettyEmily77 Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 No idea what that means either. My guess would be that it's coming from guys with hugely inflated egos and very specific criteria in mind who think women (all of them, naturally) are lacking in whatever those guys, who are of course perfect in every way themselves, are looking for.
joseb Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 When negotiating or striking up a deal, it's usually done at a "bargaining table" (another weird expression). Not a real table, but picture two business people making a deal at a fancy table. I thought it had it's origins in card games like poker - but the business transaction side makes sense too. Regarding the original question, basically people saying that are implying that some women don't offer a lot of value in a relationship from a guys perspective. Some guys are happier going it alone than entering a relationship where they feel they are giving up more than they are getting.
StanMusial Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 The girls they date probably put a few booby photos on Facebook and offer little more than that in anything that would make a relationship work. 3
carhill Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 So what exactly does it mean? Explanations vary. Mine would be the thought processes trend to the transactional, ergo someone with insufficient assets at the table is at a power disadvantage and may be considered to be impotent, weak and not viable as a transactional partner. Some people do view intimate relationships like transactions and it works for them.
autumnnight Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 I've heard people say that a lot on here. I usually reply with "bring a pizza and 12 pack" as a joke cause I really don't understand what it mean. So what exactly does it mean? This is what bitter men who either cannot get a date or who let a bad experience or two ruin them say in order to blame all women for their ineptness. Simple as that. 3
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 This is what bitter men who either cannot get a date or who let a bad experience or two ruin them say in order to blame all women for their ineptness. Simple as that. Even men who are not bitter, men who get dates, get laid, it still seems the man is putting in far more work, effort into attracting and keeping a mate than the woman is.
Maleficent Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 I think that when two people are attracted to each other, they naturally want to be with each other and it just happens easily. Both people make the effort and that is what is important. So many people go into a defense mode where they close themselves off until the other person has shown 'enough interest' to them. I understand where this behaviour is coming from but this is not the emotionally healthy way of dealing with relationships. If I'm not getting anything out of the relationship until the other person considers I've given enough, it's not worth it. 6
autumnnight Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 I am a very giving person. But I try not to keep score, as it is not a business transaction and I am not 12. 4
Timshel Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 I think that when two people are attracted to each other, they naturally want to be with each other and it just happens easily. Both people make the effort and that is what is important. So many people go into a defense mode where they close themselves off until the other person has shown 'enough interest' to them. I understand where this behaviour is coming from but this is not the emotionally healthy way of dealing with relationships. If I'm not getting anything out of the relationship until the other person considers I've given enough, it's not worth it. Agree. Lol though at this. If someone says this it means no dice, not interested and we are on a different page. One person feels that they are superior to the other for some reason and there could be many. Bottom line, it is a condescending thing to say and basically a good thing that it's been out of the way early than later. 2
toolforgrowth Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 This is what bitter men who either cannot get a date or who let a bad experience or two ruin them say in order to blame all women for their ineptness. Simple as that. Or sometimes the woman doesn't have enough to offer to make a relationship with her an attractive, viable option. Not every woman is a catch. Men have standards too, and not every woman meets them. 4
Radu Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 I am a very giving person. But I try not to keep score, as it is not a business transaction and I am not 12. Narcissists need love too.
autumnnight Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 Or sometimes the woman doesn't have enough to offer to make a relationship with her an attractive, viable option. Not every woman is a catch. Men have standards too, and not every woman meets them. I have standards. If someone doesn't meet them, I would say "HE didn't bring enough to the table." I would not say, "MEN do not bring enough to the table." 8
CarrieT Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 If you feel that way - and that men bring more to a relationship - than it is your prerogative to only have relationships with other men; so that, ultimately, you are in a relationship where both parties are "bringing enough to the table." There, see how I fixed that problem? 14
toolforgrowth Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 I have standards. If someone doesn't meet them, I would say "HE didn't bring enough to the table." I would not say, "MEN do not bring enough to the table." There are plenty of women who say relationships with men just aren't worth it. I know one. She's very kind to me, doesn't disrespect me in any way. She just believes men aren't worth it to be in a relationship. I don't get offended by it. Why do you get offended when some men say the same thing? How does it personally effect you? 1
Maleficent Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 If you feel that way - and that men bring more to a relationship - than it is your prerogative to only have relationships with other men; so that, ultimately, you are in a relationship where both parties are "bringing enough to the table." There, see how I fixed that problem? I love how you think! lol 1
Keenly Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 As long as there is Mexican food on this table, it doesn't matter what she brings In my opinion, the only thing a woman needs to bring to the table is a warm body, a loving heart, and a desire to be a part of a two person team against the world. Perhaps I'm abnormal. What else SHOULD I be expecting? 9
Maleficent Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 There are plenty of women who say relationships with men just aren't worth it. I know one. She's very kind to me, doesn't disrespect me in any way. She just believes men aren't worth it to be in a relationship. I don't get offended by it. Why do you get offended when some men say the same thing? How does it personally effect you? It doesn't. But some of us don't agree and we have a right to express our opinion. Free country and all. 1
toolforgrowth Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 If you feel that way - and that men bring more to a relationship - than it is your prerogative to only have relationships with other men; so that, ultimately, you are in a relationship where both parties are "bringing enough to the table." There, see how I fixed that problem? All kidding aside, yes you are correct. There are many men who choose to only have relationships with other men. Those relationships don't have to be sexual. It can be based on friendship, camaraderie, and mutual respect. They've already realized your proposed solution and taken it. Again, how does that affect you negatively in any way?
Robert Z Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 In my opinion, the only thing a woman needs to bring to the table is a warm body, a loving heart, and a desire to be a part of a two person team against the world. Perhaps I'm abnormal. What else SHOULD I be expecting? Perhaps a lot of men don't get that much.
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