chrissy78 Posted June 25, 2015 Share Posted June 25, 2015 You guys, I've been clean NC for 10 months now... And doing the best I can. Today I saw a for-sale sign up by his house. And I had to pull over on the side of the road and just cry!! I felt soooo sad. But I don't know why? There were/are a thousand questions in my mind. Is he leaving town? Or is he getting a bigger house for his growing family? Is his wife making him move because of her finding out? So will I now really never see him again? I know the answer to all this doesn't matter...but boy am I reliving the pain tonight. I wish I didn't have these left over feelings still. This man did a number on me. Link to post Share on other sites
FusionCutter Posted June 25, 2015 Share Posted June 25, 2015 You guys, I've been clean NC for 10 months now... And doing the best I can. Today I saw a for-sale sign up by his house. And I had to pull over on the side of the road and just cry!! I felt soooo sad. But I don't know why? There were/are a thousand questions in my mind. Is he leaving town? Or is he getting a bigger house for his growing family? Is his wife making him move because of her finding out? So will I now really never see him again? I know the answer to all this doesn't matter...but boy am I reliving the pain tonight. I wish I didn't have these left over feelings still. This man did a number on me. NC typically would include not driving by his house. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
GoldieLox Posted June 25, 2015 Share Posted June 25, 2015 NC typically would include not driving by his house. Let's give her the benefit of the doubt and assume she had to drive by the house on her way somewhere. There are some unfortunate times where I have to drive by my xAP's street because he lives a street down from good friends of my H and I. Awkward yet unavoidable. The reason you're feeling like this Chrissy is because you know this is like the final door being shut. You don't know if he's moving hours away and even though there's been no contact, you're probably panicking because now you really know there's a possibility you may never see him again (whether you consciously want to or not). You just have to keep sticking to the NC and not let it consume you. You aren't part of his life anymore. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
SycamoreCircle Posted June 25, 2015 Share Posted June 25, 2015 This man did a number on me.I'm sorry but you need to dispense with this victim mentality. Presumably, you got involved with a married man. Own up to your part of the deceit and accept your punishment. Married men with families aren't looking for better wives. They're looking for refreshment. I'm sorry for your pain. You will get through this. You will never make this mistake again. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted June 25, 2015 Share Posted June 25, 2015 I understand but this will ultimately be a good thing for you. Link to post Share on other sites
inappfriendly Posted June 25, 2015 Share Posted June 25, 2015 I completely feel your pain. I was exactly where you are a year ago. It doesn't matter if it's wrong, pointless, futile, breaking NC...WHATEVS! It still flippin' HURTS! It wrecked me for a while after I knew he was gone. That's just it. He was literally GONE. His old street is still off the main drag I use to get in and out of town. You just can't negate triggers like that. Two years out and it is all still uncomfortablely close to the surface. I am sorry you are going through this and wish I could offer hope that it will get better. Really, it just gets different. Less painful, but never back to normal. Whatever THAT is! Hugs. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Ronnie33 Posted June 25, 2015 Share Posted June 25, 2015 It's the finality of it. Even though it's over there was always that chance you could run into eachother. Now that he's moving it's gone and it the reality of never seeing him again hurts. If you were still in contact with him it would hurt more. Cry it out and keep going forward. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted June 26, 2015 Share Posted June 26, 2015 You guys, I've been clean NC for 10 months now... And doing the best I can. Today I saw a for-sale sign up by his house. And I had to pull over on the side of the road and just cry!! I felt soooo sad. But I don't know why? There were/are a thousand questions in my mind. Is he leaving town? Or is he getting a bigger house for his growing family? Is his wife making him move because of her finding out? So will I now really never see him again? You're in NC and your A is over so being blunt here, this is a good thing that he's moving on with his life...Whether it's to another area of town or across the country doesn't matter as he's NOT in your life anymore. This is good for you as it truly gives you a reality check/kick in the butt for you to let go and rid of him from your heart, rid of any little hope that might be left. You don't need to know the reasons why. It isn't your business, don't be nosy and go asking...Accept this as life is moving on and it's for the best to let go. I know the answer to all this doesn't matter...but boy am I reliving the pain tonight. I wish I didn't have these left over feelings still. This man did a number on me. Continue to grieve, cry it out whenever you need to. Just know that you will be okay. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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