Pantrfan Posted June 27, 2015 Share Posted June 27, 2015 All this starts back in 8th Grade. She stood me. She invited me to the prom with her and change her mind last minute, She still showed up but with one of her friends. I had taken this as us being Together. She broke my heart. She played me. I over looked this and still tried to go with her in 9th & 10th Grade. Failed every time... Fast forward to senior year she finally takes interest in me. The Obvious things, hug on me (she hugged other guys as well.) & tell her friends who would tell me. At first I was cautious but eventually I decided to got with. Unsure i started to look up online if I should give her a second chance. It told me i had to make her work for it... When I saw her not really caring not really "working" for it. I left her for another girl... BIG MISTAKE... I later found out how serious she was. I apologized so many times.Even the girl i left her for toke pictures of us together.I asked almost EVERYONE I KNOW for advice. People that weren't even in my personal life.They said talk to her. I must have blown up her face book with messages. Now I really want her back.She was way shorter than me,so she would rest her head on my chest. I even miss her high pitched voice. When she broke my heart She didn't care. she didn't apologized. I gave second CHANCES. I got to if I can get ONE. I'm at a community college, but next year I'm going to a college in the same city as her college. I know i will bump in to her at some point. I still care about he.I learned from my mistake,I just want an honest attempt...........Wish me luck? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
dumbass2 Posted June 27, 2015 Share Posted June 27, 2015 "I must have blown up her face book with messages" This will cause the opposite effect of what you want She has to want to. If she doesn't, you can't beg and plead and try to force it. If you have already apologized and she said no, then that is it. she knows what you want and it's up to her without you constantly bugging her, to give you that second chance. Keep contacting her and it definitely will not happen. You will push her further away. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Pantrfan Posted June 27, 2015 Author Share Posted June 27, 2015 (edited) I stop bugging her about 23 days ago " You stood me at 8th grade prom I gave you a second chance,but i guess that was different." Not sure if it worked.Usually she makes sure I see that she saw my messages, this she deleted it. I don't know if is guilt or what.I really hope this does work.One of my friends told me that she was hid he feelings since at least sophomore year. Edited June 27, 2015 by Pantrfan Link to post Share on other sites
changeofseasons Posted June 27, 2015 Share Posted June 27, 2015 I hope you're not moving to her city solely to get her back, be completly honest with yourself, do you really want her or is it your hurt ego? I think you need to bow outta this one, your guys' relationship was kind of doomed from the start, and that facebook message comes off needy and she's def. not going to be attracted to you if you come off that way. You both sound immature tbh. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted June 27, 2015 Share Posted June 27, 2015 Frankly, you are all still children and at some point in your 30s, you will realize how stupid all this drama was. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Pantrfan Posted June 28, 2015 Author Share Posted June 28, 2015 I not going out there just because of her.I been planning to go out there. Then I heard she was in the same city... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted June 28, 2015 Share Posted June 28, 2015 Just about anything you do now will irritate her. So do nothing. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
HereNorThere Posted June 29, 2015 Share Posted June 29, 2015 Attraction isn't a choice. This isn't about her giving you a second chance. Trust me, if her attraction level was high enough, the past wouldn't matter at all. Right now you're just coming off as needy and desperate. The only thing you can do to turn this around is to live your own life and show her that you're a person who has high value and is wanted by other females. To be able to get a girl, you have to be willing to lose a girl and right now you aren't. You're going to run this thing directly into the ground because you're obsessed. This will not end well for you unless you let her go and live your life. Go ahead, keep chasing her, keep trying to convince her. You'll just end up missing out on other opportunities, ruin what small chance you do have with her and rob yourself of your self-confidence. Funny part is that you two sound exactly like each other. You both just want what you can't have. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SoThatHappened Posted June 30, 2015 Share Posted June 30, 2015 You "learned from your mistake?" Your mistake is being a love-sick doormat. No wonder she doesn't want to have anything to do with you. Not being mean, just being real. You are in the most fun times of your life. You're young and going to community college. Take FULL advantage of that and try to forget about this girl. I had a solicitor call me one time while I moved away for my first year of college after CC. He asked if he could give me a survey, saying it'd only take about 15 minutes. I said, "Sure." So, he proceeds to get my information: - How old are you? 21. - Are you married? No. - Do you have any children? No. - Are you in school? Yes, junior year of college. He just paused, chuckled a bit, and said, "You know what? I'd give anything to be in your shoes right now. I'm not going to waste your time with this survey. Go enjoy being young and free right now, and have a beer for me tonight." You're young, and you have a lot to learn about attraction. Enjoy where you are in life and work on that neediness/codependency. If you want this girl, become a ghost. But, don't live your life for her. Live it for you. Link to post Share on other sites
eve_k Posted June 30, 2015 Share Posted June 30, 2015 (edited) All this starts back in 8th Grade. She stood me. She invited me to the prom with her and change her mind last minute, She still showed up but with one of her friends. I had taken this as us being Together. She broke my heart. She played me. I over looked this and still tried to go with her in 9th & 10th Grade. Failed every time... Fast forward to senior year she finally takes interest in me. The Obvious things, hug on me (she hugged other guys as well.) & tell her friends who would tell me. At first I was cautious but eventually I decided to got with. Unsure i started to look up online if I should give her a second chance. It told me i had to make her work for it... When I saw her not really caring not really "working" for it. I left her for another girl... BIG MISTAKE... I later found out how serious she was. I apologized so many times.Even the girl i left her for toke pictures of us together.I asked almost EVERYONE I KNOW for advice. People that weren't even in my personal life.They said talk to her. I must have blown up her face book with messages. Now I really want her back.She was way shorter than me,so she would rest her head on my chest. I even miss her high pitched voice. When she broke my heart She didn't care. she didn't apologized. I gave second CHANCES. I got to if I can get ONE. I'm at a community college, but next year I'm going to a college in the same city as her college. I know i will bump in to her at some point. I still care about he.I learned from my mistake,I just want an honest attempt...........Wish me luck? You have to make up your mind what sort of person you want to be? Mature or immature. This has very little to do with age. A mature individual does not punish people for their mistakes. So, you, or she can either give someone another chance, or not. "Making someone work for it" is just passive aggressive way of punishing someone. I am not saying you should be happy she stood you up. I am simply saying that if you find her worthy of another chance, and she apologized and is not standing you up anymore, making her work for it is not you trying to give another chance. It's quite the opposite, it's you not giving you two a chance by punishing her for how she has hurt you before... Nobody should make anyone work for it, people should treat each other with respect, respect each other wishes and not force their will upon the other. Otherwise, what is the point of being together? It also isn't that much straigh forward that if you gave her a second chance that she has to give you one, but yah hopefully you have some love credit with that girl. Being young also doesn't necessarily mean being single and partying. There is no reason why a young person would not be happy in a long term relationships. Nobody should be in a bad, dysfunctional relationship, but in a good one, that can make any age individual only have a better life... Only 20 year olds will party together, 30 year olds might start a family, and 40 year olds might do whatever it is 40 year olds do together... So, I do not quite agree that young people should be single coz that is the only way to have fun. I think there is loads of fun to be had in a good relationship, that never excludes having friends and doing age appropriate things... So, for God's sake, stay away from making your partner work for it, coz you can change the partner but you are stuck with the kind of man you shape yourself to be... Aim for a mature man, and let immature women and men judge your ways but allow the mature ones to recognize your value and socialize with them. Edited June 30, 2015 by eve_k Link to post Share on other sites
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