Still missing him

[ladypenelope]

Right, so here's an update from last week's post. I haven't really seen much of the older guy in the past week, and the one time I did see him he said something that really annoyed me (I have no idea why, it was just one of those irrational things). But I thought things were getting back to normal with my friend. We had arranged to meet, but he couldn't make it, so he went out of his way to find another time that would suit both of us. This was real progress as he had been ignoring me for weeks. Of course he 'forgot' he was meeting me, and had lunch with another girl. He said he'd still talk to me though, but we sat in his house with his housemates and he didn't talk, he just stared at the television.

 

I really miss his friendship. My birthday is coming up and I know he is working on the night of my party, so I want to arrange to do something with him. The thing is, I'm not sure if it's worth the bother of trying to sort something out if he's just going to ignore me again. A few weeks ago I told him how I was feeling. I told him how much I missed the friendship we used to have. He said he did too, and he gave me a hug. He held me so tight and close I thought he must mean it, but the next week he was ignoring me more than ever, and hanging around with all these other girls, acting as if he was too cool for me. When we do spend time together we get on so well, but he seems to be avoiding all chance of that these days. I'm confused. Can anyone explain to me why he's acting like this? I'm not in love with him anymore, but I do want his friendship back so much.

[Tony T]

I think you have done more than enough to show him you want his friendship. Back off and force him to make a little effort in that direction. You don't need a one-sided friendship.

 

Sometimes, people's interests shift. You may just be living in the past now. It doesn't really look like this guy is capable of being your friend now...at least not at the level you seek.

 

Would you be making this much effort just to be somebody's friend? Are you feeling you want a bit more than that? If so, forget him entirely and move on. You are barking up the wrong tree for that purpose.