Jump to content

I know he lies and I still can't do what I need to


Recommended Posts

Oneforme33

How, when you love so much, and you care so much, do you go no contact. He is a liar. He says he loves me and goes right back to his girlfriend who he doesn't even think I know about. He is never going to fess up. How do I do what's best for my self worth and health and leave the situation. It feels stronger than I am. I cannot do it... It's been 3 years... So very desperately sad..

Link to post
Share on other sites
TerraIncognita

The decision to walk away from someone you love is the hardest to make and even harder to implement. It's a purely intellectual decision, unless you have reached the point of no return - "enough".

 

Prepare yourself to a lot of pain, withdrawals, doubts and tears. At times it will seem like you just don't have it in you to keep going. You will desperately want to reach out. You will pray he doesn't try to contact you and HATE him when he doesn't, such a cognitive dissonance.

 

I'd recommend having a support system in place before you dump him. Tell a couple of friends of what's happening and ask them to be there for you. Take your calls, wipe your tears, listen patiently as you go over your wasted love again and again and again. I can't stress enough the importance of having support.

 

Then dump him. If you've been "together" for a while, saying good bye in person is a decent thing to do. Then, as you are sobbing in your car, block him on your phone, remove from social media, add his emails to blocked list, take a deep breath and be on your way to healing.

 

You've wasted 3 years of your life on this. Nothing to show for it but anxiety and unhappiness, feeling low and unimportant. You deserve better than this. You can do this. You can pick up what's left of your self esteem and rebuild it.

 

You can do this.

 

I didn't wait for my enough moment, I wasn't sure how much longer and what other stunt of his it would take to get me there. So I ended things against my will. Boy, it was by far the hardest thing I've ever done. But I am so much better off now. No regrets.

 

Hang in there. You can do this.

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
AnotherSadSong

I had a long conversation within myself last night. I finally saw all his behaviors reality-based and not emotionally-based. I looked at how he treated me and compared it to what is normal in relationships and compared it to what is above normal in relationships.

 

 

He failed.

 

 

I have a choice: continue on the a path filled with abuse or take the nearest exit which sign displays happiness, growth, and love....20 miles.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...