kingjames Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 My girlfriend and I have been dating about 3 months andchange now. Talking for nearly 8 months, I was hesitant to get into arelationship but she pursued me heavily and I began to really like her, therest is history. Well our relationship started off pretty rocky and it stillis. We went on a vacation for a couple of days and I noticed a guy in her phonewith emokis next to her name texted her quite frequently. I snooped into herphone and realized it was a guy asking sexual questions about me and her andshe even told him I was very jealous and probably saw them texting etc. Ibecame infuriated at that point and I told her everything about how I saw itand she promised it was nothing and felt bad and said it really meant nothing,that I need to trust her and know she would never cheat on me and blah blah. Weboth agreed texting was cheating but at that time I didn’t realize this wasprobably her ex and let it be and trusted her as it was a new relationship andguys may be still trying to hit it After that point the time or two I snooped I noticed shedoes delete texts now but I didn’t put too much into it and let it be. Yes Ihave some insecurities that have caused me to snoop and I don’t want to anymorebut it is like I cant trust her anymore because everytime I do I find somethingnew. But this was the breaking point the other day. About two months passed inbetween when we had our blowup about the guy in her phone. Now this pastweekend I see someone in her phone under a girls name texting quite frequenetlywith her in big paragraphs like long texts. Later that night I snooped againand realized the contact photo was her and her ex. Also they were talking aboutmore sexual stuff with each other Shes told me how abusive he was how awful he treated her andhow she was over him way before they officially broke up. Here she is thoughstill texting him not only not telling me about it but changing his name andlying to me so I wont find out…How should I handle this as I want to stay calmand understand why she blatantly lies and wants to talk to someone who treatedher so poorly….I just don’t get it…how should I go about this or should I justcur my losses as she is a cheating liar? Link to post Share on other sites
Space Ritual Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 My girlfriend and I have been dating about 3 months andchange now. Talking for nearly 8 months, I was hesitant to get into arelationship but she pursued me heavily and I began to really like her, therest is history. Well our relationship started off pretty rocky and it stillis. We went on a vacation for a couple of days and I noticed a guy in her phonewith emokis next to her name texted her quite frequently. I snooped into herphone and realized it was a guy asking sexual questions about me and her andshe even told him I was very jealous and probably saw them texting etc. Ibecame infuriated at that point and I told her everything about how I saw itand she promised it was nothing and felt bad and said it really meant nothing,that I need to trust her and know she would never cheat on me and blah blah. Weboth agreed texting was cheating but at that time I didn’t realize this wasprobably her ex and let it be and trusted her as it was a new relationship andguys may be still trying to hit it After that point the time or two I snooped I noticed shedoes delete texts now but I didn’t put too much into it and let it be. Yes Ihave some insecurities that have caused me to snoop and I don’t want to anymorebut it is like I cant trust her anymore because everytime I do I find somethingnew. But this was the breaking point the other day. About two months passed inbetween when we had our blowup about the guy in her phone. Now this pastweekend I see someone in her phone under a girls name texting quite frequenetlywith her in big paragraphs like long texts. Later that night I snooped againand realized the contact photo was her and her ex. Also they were talking aboutmore sexual stuff with each other Shes told me how abusive he was how awful he treated her andhow she was over him way before they officially broke up. Here she is thoughstill texting him not only not telling me about it but changing his name andlying to me so I wont find out…How should I handle this as I want to stay calmand understand why she blatantly lies and wants to talk to someone who treatedher so poorly….I just don’t get it…how should I go about this or should I justcur my losses as she is a cheating liar? You should go about this by leaving her to her destiny. If this is already happening after just a few months I would say that this is about as good as the relationship will get. Don't spend another moment in this low drama...RUN!!! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 Okay, you caught her sexting with another guy. You have a blow up and you two reconciled. You thought that this was all behind you. You see that she's texting a girls name a lot and you discover that she's been sexting her ex again. Only this time, she tried to pull the wool over your eyes. Dude, drop her. If she wants him so badly, she can have him. You don't need that drama in your life. She lied to you and hid stuff from you. She knows she's doing wrong and she's doing it anyway. Drop her and move on. Trust me, there are girls out there that know how to dedicate themselves to one guy. This girl isn't it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
drifter777 Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 Don't waste one more second on this relationship. You are not married & don't have kids together so just make a clean break. You can't trust her and I don't think you love her anymore. You are angry but you are used to being with her and a little scared at the thought of change. We all are. But the change is nearly always more than worth it and, in this case, I can pretty much guarantee you that one month after you stop contact with her you will be happier than you have been for a long while. Living with all of this drama is stressful and emotionally draining. Learn from the experience, wish her will and go your own way. Good luck! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 90 days in with a rocky start? You clearly don't trust her & she's still having inappropriate conversations with other men. What's to preserve? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mg101 Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 She seems to love drama and attention. She can't be trusted. Who knows if this ex was ever even abusive. Her word means zilch at this point. It's too early for so many deceptions without effort to curb them. I would say cut your loses, but you really dont have anything to lose here. Take as much time as you need to calm down. Ignore her in the interim if you want to. This is about what's best for you. After you're calm and level-headed, tell her what you found, that she is not trustworthy and you've already made your decision to end the relationship. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
casey.lives Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 first off, you can't trust someone you don't know.. trust is something you can come to do the more reliable and honest a person shows themselves to be. you should forget this person.. they will only play you and keep playing you. they need a person who can keep up with them and their games. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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