Zigoto2 Posted July 12, 2015 Share Posted July 12, 2015 My husband likes to write lists. He made a list after DDay of what he likes about his three year affair partner. It was drafted for himself and I found it on his computer a few weeks later. There were three items on the list: Gave me the courage to learn how to ride a motorcycle (they had taken the course together two years prior to this, bought a bike and then sold it a year later because he didn't like riding in traffic?) Smokes with me ( I don't like cigarettes) I helped her start her business (by giving her contracts and letting her copy parts of his website) End of list. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Cloudcuckoo Posted July 12, 2015 Share Posted July 12, 2015 My WS' explanation for why he didn't tell me that his A went underground: "Well if I would have ended it with MOW she would have told you about it and I was trying to protect you." Oh my, you must have laughed so hard you nearly peed your pants! Honestly, some of the quips made by them are simply priceless aren't they? If they weren't so funny, we'd all be taking Valium no? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
merrmeade Posted July 12, 2015 Share Posted July 12, 2015 These keep reminding me of more ... I count things the OW/SIL said along with WH's because she was family and the betrayal went very deep. The day before confronting WH, she and I had our own D-day. While still claiming they were "just friends," I asked her, then why did they hide that from me. Her explanation and supporting evidence: 1) I wouldn't have been comfortable with it. 2) My mother was a prude whereas her mother had men friends visit all the time when no one was home. 2) I don't know how to make or keep friends. Link to post Share on other sites
Noirek Posted July 12, 2015 Share Posted July 12, 2015 My husband likes to write lists. He made a list after DDay of what he likes about his three year affair partner. It was drafted for himself and I found it on his computer a few weeks later. There were three items on the list: Gave me the courage to learn how to ride a motorcycle (they had taken the course together two years prior to this, bought a bike and then sold it a year later because he didn't like riding in traffic?) Smokes with me ( I don't like cigarettes) I helped her start her business (by giving her contracts and letting her copy parts of his website) End of list. Not a very flattering list for a 3 year affair... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Tread Carefully Posted July 12, 2015 Share Posted July 12, 2015 "I only fell in love with her. It's not like I f*cked her!" For two years...? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
waterwoman Posted July 13, 2015 Share Posted July 13, 2015 'I thought you liked her?' Ha! Ha ha ha ha! Actually I did quite like her. In fact I liked her so much that I invited her in for coffee and she proceeded to grill me about you and our childrenliked her so much that at your 50th birthday party when she was trying to leave her 'abusive' H I gave her a hug and offered her a bed for the night. After dday I wasn't quite so keen. Link to post Share on other sites
angelcake Posted July 13, 2015 Share Posted July 13, 2015 When I questioned phone records showing OW had sent him pictures via text, "She was only sending me pics of cakes that she baked. She's creative" Then it was "Well she just said the right things, that's why it happened"... after realizing I wasn't going to take him back, he said "but I took care of you when you had strep throat!" It's crazy how narcissistic minds work! LOL Link to post Share on other sites
i am gutted Posted July 13, 2015 Share Posted July 13, 2015 i text mine one night and said - you are killing me inside you know. his reply - "stop worrying" really! and still messing round. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
casey.lives Posted July 13, 2015 Share Posted July 13, 2015 as a person who was cheated on by my 8 month and two month live in partner. i can say that the affair happened so fast i was left with the feeling of enormous panic. i was not too surprised he cheated on me .. he was a lady's man.. they loved him, he loved them. it was the perfect storm. we came together by sheer low downness and there was nothing romantic or significant or personal about it. i think it was a decent run for ..you know.. a trial.. honestly there was no love between us and from our low down coming together, there was no respect either. i wasn't hurt by the "event" i was hurt by the aftermath Link to post Share on other sites
Sandy43 Posted July 13, 2015 Share Posted July 13, 2015 The day after dday he sent her a NC email and she responded with ok but can you please delete the pics I sent you. When I asked what pics, he said she had sent him some pics in her halloween costume. Like I would actually buy that. Idiot.. I just looked at him and he confessed to naked pics and videos. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Betrayed&Stayed Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 Soon after D-Day we were in one of our first MC sessions. Our upcoming wedding anniversary was a few months away. My wife told the counselor that she wanted us to renew our wedding vows on that next anniversary. My jaw hit the floor and I looked at her and said something along the lines of "Are you fing kidding me?!" 2 Link to post Share on other sites
VeryBrokenMan Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 Ok, I'll play this game: These were all early on before she "got" how wrong these types of answers were: 1. It was a mistake 2. I always loved you 3. You were distant and not paying attention to me (yeah, working my ass off) 4. I did not think you would notice 5. When I asked if they used a condom: "He would not do that to me". 6. I had to look for it elsewhere because you were not giving me what I needed. 7. I never intended to hurt you 8. He was a really smooth talker 9. It was all just a game 10. I asked: why did you say you loved him so many times? Her: because I thought that is what he wanted to hear. 11. I have never worn a wedding ring and she asked me to start wearing one a couple of months after dday when we were a hair away from divorce. Me: Why? So you don't cheat again? The screwed up thinking that goes into cheating is just incredible. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
RightThere Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 My STBXW had multiple affairs over many years. When we were discussing the fact that I cannot trust her about things because she is a compulsive liar, she responded: "I only lied to you once. And that was about the affairs." 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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