I4givehim Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 Is it hard to fill for a divorce yourself. Do you really need a lawyer. Link to post Share on other sites
Tayla Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 The filing is easy. Its the judge and the rulings that will boggle you. Some folks get an attorney when children or assets are involved. Link to post Share on other sites
No Limit Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 It's only easy when both partners work everything out themselves. But that's very, very rare and the danger of a sneaky partner eventually trying to screw you over is great; a lawyer is the safest route. Link to post Share on other sites
loveweary11 Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 It's a piece of cake. Took my ex wife and I about an hour. We filled it all out, got it notarized and sent it in. Several weeks later, the paperwork arrives back saying you are divorced. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Tayla Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 Loveweary, you indeed did the mature way. having the spouse be co operative is key. never quite grasped the givemegiveme attitude thru divorce... freedom is what you are given. Take it and value it. Op- is this a general quest you are persuing? Link to post Share on other sites
Gus Grimly Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 ..... the danger of a sneaky partner eventually trying to screw you over is great; a lawyer is the safest route. I've seen this happen and it's horrible when the other person realizes it's too late after they find out what's happened. Some folks get an attorney when children or assets are involved. Yes, get a lawyer if that's the case. Trust me, in the long run you'll have a no regrets. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
LoveMyCat Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 My divorce will cost a flat $2000, even if we have issues, which may happen with my spouse. It would be $1000 if we agreed and had my lawyer handle it all. The $2000 will cover if it has to go,to court. It is worth it to me to have my lawyer deal with him and all of it. If I filed myself, I know I would end up giving in to anything he wanted,just to be done with it. I don't want much, less than half, but do not want to give up everything completely either. Link to post Share on other sites
Hardgrind Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 My STBXW and I are doing our divorce collaboratively in Texas. We each retained a lawyer but we did all the negotiations about asset splits directly with each other. The lawyers role is to prepare all the proper paperwork. Having lawyers representing us provides extra security that the paperwork around the house ownership (DOTTSA and SWD) and the retirement accounts (QDRO) are done properly. The combined costs for our lawyers ($10,000 max) has been about 1 % of the value of the assets in question, so it was a reasonable cost for us. My view is the retainers for our lawyers were a reasonable investment to give my STBXW enough security to stay in the collaborative process. If she had bolted and we went adversarial, our costs would have been much higher. Divorce gets finalized next week. Link to post Share on other sites
loveweary11 Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 (edited) Loveweary, you indeed did the mature way. having the spouse be co operative is key. never quite grasped the givemegiveme attitude thru divorce... freedom is what you are given. Take it and value it. True. I'd have never married anyone who was a total jerk to begin with. We just split things in what seemed to be a fair way, both giving, rather than both taking. It set me back financially, pretty severely, mid boat build, but at least it wasn't something that took up time and stressed me out in addition to the emotional aspects. You can always get more money, but you can't get back time. There were substantial assets involved. She took most of the liquid stuff, I took most of the hard assets. We also kept our own vehicles. This is why I had to open a second business... to get my liquidity back up to finish some projects on my hard assets. Edited July 11, 2015 by loveweary11 Link to post Share on other sites
SammySammy Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 I've represented myself in court twice and won both times. I've also started a couple of businesses. Took care of all the paperwork myself. Divorce is not one of those things I would attempt without a lawyer unless there were no children involved and little to no assets. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 It depends. As a general proposition anyone who represents themselves has a fool for a client. Go to the judiciary home page for your state. There are usually tutorials & forms there. Check out on line resources & places like NOLO.com Link to post Share on other sites
Clay Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 Go down to your local law library. There give public access to other cases. You should also be able to get online and see other divorce samples for your state. It will depend highly on your situation. If you can work out most of the assets and money your better off on doing the paper work your self but if you can this is where you can get a mediator yourself and work directly with them and your husband to sort things out. As the others have stated once you both agree on things filing is not hard. Just research your states laws on divorce as to the waiting time. My state has a 21 day period for waiting. For instance even with 10 years of marriage they still only made me wait 21 days to have the divorce finalized. Other states have a longer waiting period. Clay Link to post Share on other sites
ChicagoSparty Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 My XW and I did it ourselves. The only cost was filing fees. It takes being able to communicate and negotiate, but it's doable. I think I spent a total of $70. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author I4givehim Posted July 12, 2015 Author Share Posted July 12, 2015 Go down to your local law library. There give public access to other cases. You should also be able to get online and see other divorce samples for your state. It will depend highly on your situation. If you can work out most of the assets and money your better off on doing the paper work your self but if you can this is where you can get a mediator yourself and work directly with them and your husband to sort things out. As the others have stated once you both agree on things filing is not hard. Just research your states laws on divorce as to the waiting time. My state has a 21 day period for waiting. For instance even with 10 years of marriage they still only made me wait 21 days to have the divorce finalized. Other states have a longer waiting period. Clay Clay, I wish it was that easy. My STBXH refuses to sit down and even talk about a divorce. I said neither one of us have a retainer few for a lawyer, lets use a mediator. He said if you go the lawyer route he will make my life a living hell. He will have me in court fighting over the littlest thing. So, I am saving my pennies for a lawyer. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted July 12, 2015 Share Posted July 12, 2015 Typical guy stuff - can't kill ya so I'll make your life living hell in court. It's talk. Go ahead and file first; that way he's under the gun to respond in a timely manner, one proscribed by the court. Since divorce lawyers often like a mountain of cash as a retainer, I did an end run, retaining a law firm for some estate planning and trustee stuff, at a paltry sum, then floating the 'by the way' balloon once that retainer was billed out and I was into hourly billing. Worked great. My lawyer even worked out a bankruptcy deal to put the legal fees on a mileage earning credit card and then default on it if need be. That wasn't needed but I had a really good law firm working all the angles. Remember, consultations are generally free. Pick the three best lawyers in your area and get consultations. Why? That way they can't represent your husband. They're disallowed. Takes them out of the running for, wait for it, no cost. Find out if your court has self-help. Ours did, about a dozen staff members who help with getting all the stuff filed right. Free! They don't dispense legal advice but did refer a few mediators, one of which we used. Free! You have your brain and time. You can do a lot with both. Good luck! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
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