emi Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 Im currently being in a long distance relationship with a guy from Germany. We met online, texted , cammed for around haft a year then he came over and visit me. He stayed for a month. Its seem like we have no problem transit what we have online to what we have offline. We didnt have sex on the vacation. Everything is nice. What bothering me is whenever i go with him, people seems to look at me like im a prostitue. Mind you, im Asian and hes white. Hes 2 years older than me so its sure he doesnt look like a sugar daddy. Even his close friend and his family sometime making mean joke like i want to use hum to get my butt to Germany. I didnt ask him to bail me there. Really tired atm. What to do. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 12, 2015 Share Posted July 12, 2015 Based solely on what you posted I think your perception that people look at you like you are a prostitute when you are with him may be all in your mind. Are you embarrassed or ashamed of the relationship? If so you need to figure out why I think the bigger immigration issues you face are far more important. Link to post Share on other sites
justwhoiam Posted July 13, 2015 Share Posted July 13, 2015 (edited) We didnt have sex on the vacation. Everything is nice. How many LDRs did you have so far? whenever i go with him, people seems to look at me like im a prostitue. Was he splurging his money? Is he well off? Did he rent a car that doesn't go unnoticed? Does he wear high-end brand clothes? Did he buy you stuff? Did you go shopping with him? Even his close friend and his family sometime making mean joke like i want to use hum to get my butt to Germany. I suspect he told you so? How does he react to all that? Edited July 14, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Link to post Share on other sites
Author emi Posted July 13, 2015 Author Share Posted July 13, 2015 How manyu LDRs did you have so far? Was he splurging his money? Is he well off? Did he rent a car that doesn't go unnoticed? A he wear high-end brand clothes? Did he buy you stuff? Did you go shopping with him? I suspect he told you so? How does he react to all that? Hi, This is the first one. Before i had an internet fling which was plain stupid. And, he isnt rich, just normal worker. Actually he just finished his job trainning in Febuary. We didnt do anything that may cause attention. But i think the fact hes white has alot to do with it. About his friend, when she texted him asking him come over he said hes not there and sent a few picts of us. She said im not good and just want his money. I was offended. But he said dont bother, that his friend doesnt know me and stuff. And he doesnt really care what people say But all those stare, giggle, rude comments really annoying Link to post Share on other sites
Author emi Posted July 13, 2015 Author Share Posted July 13, 2015 Hi, I havent think about immigration yet. I think thats abit too rush. And no hes great, im proud of him. While most young people are out partying and doing drugs, he goes work. When im with him he treats me well, not like lavishing money but simple thing like carry gorcery bags and stuffs. Based solely on what you posted I think your perception that people look at you like you are a prostitute when you are with him may be all in your mind. Are you embarrassed or ashamed of the relationship? If so you need to figure out why I think the bigger immigration issues you face are far more important. Link to post Share on other sites
casey.lives Posted July 13, 2015 Share Posted July 13, 2015 maybe you are too used to using our sexuality and you need to learn to rein it in... it's not a horrible problem and it can be fixed. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted July 13, 2015 Share Posted July 13, 2015 No matter what you do, there will be people who judge you (and/or your partner). This is unavoidable. What really matters is how he treats you and how you feel about your R without all that external noise. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
justwhoiam Posted July 13, 2015 Share Posted July 13, 2015 About his friend, when she texted him asking him come over he said hes not there and sent a few picts of us. She said im not good and just want his money. I was offended. But he said dont bother, that his friend doesnt know me and stuff. And he doesnt really care what people say Is that enough for you? I sort of have that approach myself, people can have different views. But if they get offensive, or blatantly racists, I would hardly be able to shut up. And from what you wrote, I guess he let it pass. I would realize that a person like that girl can only be an acquaintance for me, not a friend, and I'd start distancing myself. Being condescending won't help. But all those stare, giggle, rude comments really annoying I'm thinking maybe you two have substantial physical differences? Like thin/fat? Big/small? Tall/short? Not sure, but if he came to you and you experienced all that, Asians probably are not used to see white people in your area. That doesn't mean you'd go through the same in other countries. Not sure about Germany, maybe Germans will be able to give their insight on that. From what you are saying, where you live doesn't sound like the best place to live with him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author emi Posted July 14, 2015 Author Share Posted July 14, 2015 Honestly it seems not really enough for me. I was abit taken aback by how he let it slide. But i also know his laid-back style and well, i doesnt wanr to be a drama queen because what can i do? Ask him dump his family and dicht his friend is sound like some psychos action. And hm, we dont have that much difference in apperance. Hes just taller than me abit. Im at his shoulder height. And hes like 15kg more or so. But well, i guess there is nothing i can do just to ignore what bothering me. Thanks justwhoiam Is that enough for you? I sort of have that approach myself, people can have different views. But if they get offensive, or blatantly racists, I would hardly be able to shut up. And from what you wrote, I guess he let it pass. I would realize that a person like that girl can only be an acquaintance for me, not a friend, and I'd start distancing myself. Being condescending won't help. I'm thinking maybe you two have substantial physical differences? Like thin/fat? Big/small? Tall/short? Not sure, but if he came to you and you experienced all that, Asians probably are not used to see white people in your area. That doesn't mean you'd go through the same in other countries. Not sure about Germany, maybe Germans will be able to give their insight on that. From what you are saying, where you live doesn't sound like the best place to live with him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author emi Posted July 14, 2015 Author Share Posted July 14, 2015 maybe you are too used to using our sexuality and you need to learn to rein it in.... Sorry i dont understand what you mean 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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