bicyclejunk Posted May 10, 2005 Share Posted May 10, 2005 You CAN do what you want,...when you want. Did you even read back to yourself what you wrote? You said "Do you think you can still do what you want, when you want when you have a boyfriend or Girlfriend?" Are you suggesting that everythings fine in a relationship if one person just WANTS to cheat, but simply doesnt? If they want to cheat,....THATS cheating. Simply stopping them from the act doesnt mean you've fixed whatever the problem is. Im simply saying that if someone Im with tries to stop me from doing something I want to do, whatever is,....simply to make THEM not feal jealous, or insecure,....or unhappy,...then Im out of the relationship. I dont need insecure people in my life. If you trust me in one situation,..then you MUST trust me all situations,...or else, my friend,....it aint trust. SPending "special time" with one another IS what its all about, yes,...as long as you can still spend time with your family and friends like you did before. Trust has nothing to do with trusting the guy at the mall that might hit on me. Its about trusting what I DO in that situation. Accepting the things you cant change, the courage to change the things you can,....and knowing the difference. I didn't say you SHOULDN'T be able to do whatever you want to at anytime, i said It's SELFISH to think that you should be Entitled to, even though you have a GF/BF. For you to think: "Okay, i'm going to allow you to be exclusive with me, but I'm still going to do whatever I want, whenever I feel like it, and I shouldn't have to check with you, I'm going to do whatever I want, nothing is going to change that"...is pretty damn selfish. It's very ME, ME, ME. That's not a relationship. What's the point? I balance Family and Friends and My Girl and I have no trouble doing it. All I was ever saying in the beginning was: Some things have to change. Not everything, but some things. You become a couple, you compromise some things, you make a few sacrifices for her or him. YES, you can still do youre old routine, see your friends, hang with them etc etc. But you balance them and sometimes one overrules, the other. But to say absolutely NOTHING will change and i'm going to do the SAME EXACT THINGS I DID WHEN I WAS SINGLE, even though i'm with someone now, is Selfish and self-centered. That's why i think A lot of relationships don't work, because some people want the closeness and security of a relationship, but then, they still want to be able to do whatever they want all the time. Then DON'T Get Into A Relationship! It's too grown up for you, obviously. Im simply saying that if someone Im with tries to stop me from doing something I want to do, whatever is,....simply to make THEM not feal jealous, or insecure,....or unhappy,...then Im out of the relationship. Well then you must have had a bad experience with some dude who made you feel bad about doing your thing. My girl doesn't make me feel bad. But i'm considerate enough to include her or even cancel a "guys night out" to be with her if she feels like doing something together. It's a healthy balance. I can go be stupid with my friends whenever, it's not mandatory for me, i'm not afraid of losing my youth or like I have to party and have all this fun before I get serious and settle down and get married. Being in a relationship is not a Death Sentence. Link to post Share on other sites
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