What was the most mind boggling or insane thing your MM or MW said?

[NewLeaf512]

Two weeks before we broke off our 4 year relationship or whatever it was, he plopped on the large leather couch I have in my room, arms crossed and legs crossed with his grin I used to adore, and said you know I am really getting used to this. (The man couch) I like it. It was his spot.

 

 

He said the most awful things in our huge nuclear fight 2 weeks later.

 

 

Oh well, it was all fake.

 

AnotherSadSong thank you so much for creating this thread. It made me have to review a LOT of events and discussions and really helped it hit home just how insane this fake reality was that I was living, what behaviour I not only tolerated but longed for, these scraps of his time and attention. Not only am I completely regretful for how I hurt BW but how I had 0 ZERO self love or respect for myself.

So not to derail the thread:

 

Another bizarre thing he did: I got him very few gifts one of which was a really lovely button down shirt that was tailored. The occupation we have requires us to look well turned out and involves global travel and provides an extremely generous salary. He loved the shirt. Cried. I said why are you crying in your birthday week?

 

"I love this shirt so much but I can't take it home because I'm not ALLOWED to buy my own clothes and I'm not ALLOWED to spend more than 50 (MM currency) without BW agreeing"

 

Wow. We are both on salaries just shy of 7 figures.

 

( now I'm laughing that I thought I was in love with a MM who had to ask to spend greater than 50. What was i thinking!)

[AnotherSadSong]

AnotherSadSong thank you so much for creating this thread. It made me have to review a LOT of events and discussions and really helped it hit home just how insane this fake reality was that I was living, what behaviour I not only tolerated but longed for, these scraps of his time and attention. Not only am I completely regretful for how I hurt BW but how I had 0 ZERO self love or respect for myself.

So not to derail the thread:

 

Another bizarre thing he did: I got him very few gifts one of which was a really lovely button down shirt that was tailored. The occupation we have requires us to look well turned out and involves global travel and provides an extremely generous salary. He loved the shirt. Cried. I said why are you crying in your birthday week?

 

"I love this shirt so much but I can't take it home because I'm not ALLOWED to buy my own clothes and I'm not ALLOWED to spend more than 50 (MM currency) without BW agreeing"

 

Wow. We are both on salaries just shy of 7 figures.

 

( now I'm laughing that I thought I was in love with a MM who had to ask to spend greater than 50. What was i thinking!)

 

 

Mine said the same exact thing!

The little boys they are.

[NewLeaf512]

You cannot check who has been viewing it. He made references to things I did or about me that he would only know from FB and accidental friends requests that show up in mailbox. I never thought it was stalking but curiosity.

 

I do it all the time. You just have to view the source code. Here is an easy video tutorial on how to do it. I hope you find it useful. Thanks

 

[RainDown]

Him: I don't like that you're seeing other people.

Me: But you're seeing other people, as well.

Him: No, I'm not seeing anyone else.

Me: No, I mean you're married and seeing other people, right?

Him: I'm not understanding what you're talking about...?

Me: I'm just pointing out that you are married and seeing someone else. I am in a relationship with you and seeing someone else. If you are suggesting that neither of us should see someone else, that means you can't see me.

Him: Blank stare.

 

Oy.

[solostand]

Oh yeah, he always referred to the bs as "The Old Lady". Always.

[NewLeaf512]

Him: I don't like that you're seeing other people.

Me: But you're seeing other people, as well.

Him: No, I'm not seeing anyone else.

Me: No, I mean you're married and seeing other people, right?

Him: I'm not understanding what you're talking about...?

Me: I'm just pointing out that you are married and seeing someone else. I am in a relationship with you and seeing someone else. If you are suggesting that neither of us should see someone else, that means you can't see me.

Him: Blank stare.

 

Oy.

 

Priceless completely Priceless

[nikki76]

I do it all the time. You just have to view the source code. Here is an easy video tutorial on how to do it. I hope you find it useful. Thanks

 

 

 

Omg, does this actually work? I have mm blocked so I know he can't view me, but just knowing that this can be done is another reason I hate electronics. Big brother is always watching lol.

[privategal]

Oh yeah, he always referred to the bs as "The Old Lady". Always.

Isnt it interesting how in the midst of it too..those kinds of statements are somehow like..comforting or something for lack of a better way of describing it.

I think digs to the wife may help alot of ap not see the bs as a good person..someone they are hurting. Its like the ap believes she isnt nice, lovable, nice to him...they paint there wives as less than favorable and as an object so their ow is manipulated into feeling she is his true love.

If ANY husband were to be heard by his wife referring to her as "the old lady"?

Id be on an episode of snapped! Omg!

[nikki76]

Isnt it interesting how in the midst of it too..those kinds of statements are somehow like..comforting or something for lack of a better way of describing it.

I think digs to the wife may help alot of ap not see the bs as a good person..someone they are hurting. Its like the ap believes she isnt nice, lovable, nice to him...they paint there wives as less than favorable and as an object so their ow is manipulated into feeling she is his true love.

If ANY husband were to be heard by his wife referring to her as "the old lady"?

Id be on an episode of snapped! Omg!

 

This is so true!! You are spot on!!

 

I remember asking x mm if he thought I was as sexually attractive as his WS. He said "its like comparing a Ferrari to a Mini Cooper."

At the time, I felt honored (wtf). Now looking back, it's just plain sad that I ever put myself in that "situation ".

[AnotherSadSong]

Omg, does this actually work? I have mm blocked so I know he can't view me, but just knowing that this can be done is another reason I hate electronics. Big brother is always watching lol.

 

I looked at the link and it looks like FB found out and stopped it and changed format. I think it had worked for some.

[GoldieLox]

Every word that came out of his mouth.

[NewLeaf512]

I looked at the link and it looks like FB found out and stopped it and changed format. I think it had worked for some.

 

I just did it 5 min ago but we need to stay on thread topic. Message if you like

[Southern Sun]

This could go on all day.

 

After I told him about a time I was date raped in college (I was very upset, told him this in a vulnerable moment), he reciprocated with a story about how one night when he was out of town for work, a girl followed him to his room in his hotel and insisted on giving him a BJ. Was that an effort at empathy...?

 

When we first tried to end things, he told me we were over, but said, "I don't know if I can always resist you physically," (as if I'm some temptress). And then he said, "But when those times come, you can say no."

 

One time, after he was passive aggressively huffing about his dissatisfaction with parts of our sexual relationship (he wouldn't tell me, just kept dropping jokes). I said, it sounds like you're serious! He finally told me in the most embarrassing way. When I expressed that it felt like he was comparing me to his previous OW, he said, "Well, that's when you know God's ways are best! If we just had sex with the person we married, we wouldn't have anyone to compare to!"

 

Once after I brought up an issue that was perfectly appropriate for me to be concerned about, he got very defensive and angry with me. I got scared and immediately backed off, and said that he was taking me wrong, I didn't intend for it to go there. His part of the apology was, "Quickie after your appointment?"

 

When he first expressed his feelings for me, within ONE week, he TEXTED me that he loved me. Nothing had happened and at this point, I had told him NO. I remember he said, "I do love you." I always thought the "do" part was weird. Anyway, I kind of stammered and said something like, I'm speechless. And he said, "Well, you better get it figured out."

[Giggle]

When he goes "if we were together".. And either tell me something or ask if I really would. Right, cause never land is ever happening.

 

Actually I've been boggling that since his wife caught some texts, and made him delete an app, he's been way mushier. Hardly a day goes by without some form of I love you even it's a bbl love ya. He had never ever done that before.

[nikki76]

 

When we first tried to end things, he told me we were over, but said, "I don't know if I can always resist you physically," (as if I'm some temptress). And then he said, "But when those times come, you can say no."

."

 

My xmm always used to say that "I would never be able to

resist you. And "just being next to you brings me close to orgasam. "

 

 

I need a barf bag to read all these things that these pathetic men say.

[norudder]

It all sounds so common.... and completely dull and ordinary. Not special and heartfelt at all like I thought it was. So delusional and disconnected from reality we both were. So sad.

 

He used a line similar to Francesca's in Bridges of Madison when I ended it, saying part of him was glad we would always have "this" and remain perfect to each other in memory. Completely not getting that "Perfect" is not at all how I'd be remembering him. But that's what he needs to feel good about himself and keep as a mental escape from his chosen misery in life.

 

He was going to plant a bush of my favorite flower in his yard. Am I supposed to be flattered? And right in front of his wife? Completely insulting to both of us.

 

I have another thread of this ridiculousness too.

[AnotherSadSong]

It all sounds so common.... and completely dull and ordinary. Not special and heartfelt at all like I thought it was. So delusional and disconnected from reality we both were. So sad.

 

He used a line similar to Francesca's in Bridges of Madison when I ended it, saying part of him was glad we would always have "this" and remain perfect to each other in memory. Completely not getting that "Perfect" is not at all how I'd be remembering him. But that's what he needs to feel good about himself and keep as a mental escape from his chosen misery in life.

 

He was going to plant a bush of my favorite flower in his yard. Am I supposed to be flattered? And right in front of his wife? Completely insulting to both of us.

 

A flower bush? I have heard it all now! They do like to visit the crime scene, his special souvenir. That is creepy. None of us would even put up with this from a single man. If they did and said this stuff we would be creeped out running for the hills. There wouldn't be a second date.

[bentleychic]

In one of our first conversations after first meeting, the topic of marital status came up and MM said, "Well, yeah, I'm married. But not THAT married."

 

haha That reminds me of another married guy that's been circling around and I responded with "Aren't you happily married? I'm assuming you aren't in an open relationship?" His response "Well yeah, I'm married, but we're still our own individual people and do our own things."

 

Wasn't that a non-answer answer? I doubt "our own things" and hobbies in a relationship include having sex with another person.

[autumnnight]

I just did it 5 min ago but we need to stay on thread topic. Message if you like

 

I'd like to know about this too.

 

Boy, it sounds like MP have a script sometimes, doesn't it?

[AnotherSadSong]

I'd like to know about this too.

 

Boy, it sounds like MP have a script sometimes, doesn't it?

This was about leaf's post about seeing who views your FB.

[autumnnight]

This was about leaf's post about seeing who views your FB.

 

I know. I'd like to add that little skill to my aresenal

[MuddyFootprints]

You can't see random peeks and sourcing through the code is very time consuming.

[Giggle]

I'm just happy to have you in my life, why can't you just enjoy what we can have.

[AnotherSadSong]

You can't see random peeks and sourcing through the code is very time consuming.

 

I checked it out early morning and then I changed thought that I really do not care who is looking especially the ex. I do not need the mental gymnastics.

 

 

I believe it could only be proven in theory if there were profiles showing up that you have never searched and are not friends of friends. FB's algorithm is complicated and they constantly update it. Who knows why it is displaying those profiles, a mixed batch.

[NewLeaf512]

I checked it out early morning and then I changed thought that I really do not care who is looking especially the ex. I do not need the mental gymnastics.

 

 

I believe it could only be proven in theory if there were profiles showing up that you have never searched and are not friends of friends. FB's algorithm is complicated and they constantly update it. Who knows why it is displaying those profiles, a mixed batch.

 

I can tell you that there is an easy algorithm to parse the code and get compound results in 2 minutes. As a barrister with a cyber type area of practice the profile appearing first is who looks at you most often and this is admissible in America and the UK.

 

Now back to stupid things that were said:

 

I am only the "authentic " me when I am with you. (You mean when sneaking around like criminals is who you are authentically are?)