BlueIris Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 grrr.... "try NOT to assume she's thinking bad things about you." (If only I could type!) Sorry about that. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Male Posted July 14, 2015 Author Share Posted July 14, 2015 Other people feel differently. That doesn't make them wrong. Exactly why I said "I disagree" rather than saying "You are wrong". I'll wait here for your next attempt. Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 Most women connect and have a soft spot for a single guy they see that has kids. Go to any little league game on the weekend and see the way women swoon over single dads and their kids. Its also portrayed in countless movies and TV shows. (Art typically imitates life in case you didnt know) So you're basing your conclusions on what you see at weekend little league games? Also you didn't actually address anything I said, which exposes your pick-and-choose self defense method pretty clearly. (In addition to the "if you disagree with me, you're nuts" statement you since deleted.) grrr.... "try NOT to assume she's thinking bad things about you." (If only I could type!) Sorry about that. That was actually pretty epic. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
William Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 Let's get back to assumptions placed on middle aged single guys and move away from personal banter. Thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
Brigit_1 Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 Its pretty sad that in the dating world if you are a single male, older than 35, with no kids, and no dog, many women "assume" negative thoughts about you and your situation. You are instantly looked at having issues, or having something wrong with you. If I had a child or two, then I am looked at in a positive light. All of a sudden its assumed I'm a hard working single dad, mature, and doing my best to take care of my kids. Even if I have a dog, then women connect that with someone that cares, someone that has responsibility, and knows how to take care of something. But if I have no kids, no dog or other pet, then its open season on speculation. I'm compared to all the other cookie-cutter guys that have kids and dogs. The number one question that single moms have asked me when on a date..."How come you never had kids"? Like they have to verify that my answer fits neatly into their list of acceptable answers before we move forward. ...so get a dog. They're awesome. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
serial muse Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 You CANNOT compare the two situations. Most men if they find the woman attractive do not care about backround info. They accept you at face value. They accept you as you are now. Many women on the other hand are like tabloid journalists scrounging around for every piece of dirt that they can find on the guy so they can make snap judgments. Huh? Of course they're comparable. She answered the exact questions you're bristling at being asked (and which you say men wouldn't ask). The difference is, she didn't bristle. She gave honest open answers and didn't get defensive. It's like magic! 6 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 Everyone who is dating looking for "the one" as opposed to casual, has their radar on full. They want to know everything, and some will act like tabloid journalists and dig for dirt, just in case they are being duped or made a fool of. So yes, they are going to see red flags and they are going to make snap judgements. Why wouldn't they? Anyone out of the ordinary is going to be scrutinised and questions asked. Why is he still single at 35? Why has no-one else found him attractive. Why has he not settled down? Is he a commitment-phobe? A misogynist? A male chauvinist? An abuser? An all round bad person? Is he a weirdo? etc. etc. It is human nature. Why does no-one want to buy that house? Why is that car so cheap? Why does no-one want to employ her? We like things to be "normal" and anything "abnormal" we question, as our experience tells us "If it doesn't sound right then it probably isn't right." and we need reassured before taking any risks. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
autumnnight Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 Anyone out of the ordinary is going to be scrutinised and questions asked. Why is he still single at 35? Because he lacks social skills and the ability to read social cues Why has no-one else found him attractive. Because he is negative and has a chip on his shouder Why has he not settled down? Because he hasn't grown up enough Is he a commitment-phobe? No, but getting laid by the 10 he wants is more important A misogynist?Probably A male chauvinist?Pretty much An abuser?Nah An all round bad person? I doubt it Is he a weirdo? Define weird - awkward, stubborn, and a bit emotionally unintelligent? Probablyetc. etc. Honestly, you can answer a lot of the above questions just through regular observation Link to post Share on other sites
Bobbi7 Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 In all honestly, I doubt people even look down on men who are single, middle aged, no kids. Men complain about these type of things, when clearly women who are middle aged, single, no kids have to deal with this kind of crap on a daily basis and doesn't even compare to men. A woman's biological clock is ticking in her mid 30's-after 40 it ain't gonna happen. I assume the majority of women want to have their own kids. Men have to easy-they can gain weight, shed hair, turn 60 and most likely a 25 year old woman can go walking his way. Old men have the option have putting his dick in different vaginas, they can buy hookers. Yet, do you think a 60 year women has the option? No. For a man to get a woman 10-15 years younger than him, it comes easy, for a 60 year old woman, no man younger or older will want her. Men can do fine without have a permanent partner because they have the option of hookers. People will always praise men for having sex with different women. Women are suppose to settle down with 1 man-we don't buy male prostitutes. A man little one's will be potent and strong as ever even when he is 70 and can knock someone up. He will always have that option of having kids-he just needs to find a young, fresh 25 year old to do it with. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
loveweary11 Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 Its pretty sad that in the dating world if you are a single male, older than 35, with no kids, and no dog, many women "assume" negative thoughts about you and your situation. You are instantly looked at having issues, or having something wrong with you. If I had a child or two, then I am looked at in a positive light. All of a sudden its assumed I'm a hard working single dad, mature, and doing my best to take care of my kids. Even if I have a dog, then women connect that with someone that cares, someone that has responsibility, and knows how to take care of something. But if I have no kids, no dog or other pet, then its open season on speculation. I'm compared to all the other cookie-cutter guys that have kids and dogs. The number one question that single moms have asked me when on a date..."How come you never had kids"? Like they have to verify that my answer fits neatly into their list of acceptable answers before we move forward. There's *definitely* something wrong with me then. Screw having kids Screw dogs Screw anyone who has a problem with how I live I'll take a cat though. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Rejected Rosebud Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 There's *definitely* something wrong with me then. Screw having kids Screw dogs Screw anyone who has a problem with how I live I'll take a cat though. Yeah but you are kind of unusual for a middle aged man you seem more like a teenager. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
autumnnight Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 Yeah but you are kind of unusual for a middle aged man you seem more like a teenager. Wait, Loveweary is middle aged? In that case...how YOU doin lol Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 LW's still 'young.' The general consensus on middle age as far as I can see is that it starts ~ age 40. Link to post Share on other sites
DaisyBug Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 To bang her like a screen door in a hurricane. Never heard that one before! Hilarious!!! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gloria25 Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 In all honestly, I doubt people even look down on men who are single, middle aged, no kids. Men complain about these type of things, when clearly women who are middle aged, single, no kids have to deal with this kind of crap on a daily basis and doesn't even compare to men. A woman's biological clock is ticking in her mid 30's-after 40 it ain't gonna happen. I assume the majority of women want to have their own kids. Men have to easy-they can gain weight, shed hair, turn 60 and most likely a 25 year old woman can go walking his way. Old men have the option have putting his dick in different vaginas, they can buy hookers. Yet, do you think a 60 year women has the option? No. For a man to get a woman 10-15 years younger than him, it comes easy, for a 60 year old woman, no man younger or older will want her. Men can do fine without have a permanent partner because they have the option of hookers. People will always praise men for having sex with different women. Women are suppose to settle down with 1 man-we don't buy male prostitutes. A man little one's will be potent and strong as ever even when he is 70 and can knock someone up. He will always have that option of having kids-he just needs to find a young, fresh 25 year old to do it with. THANK YOU!!! I "double like" your post ΛΛΛ Link to post Share on other sites
DaisyBug Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 And IME, having kids is just baggage to most single women, especially the ones without kids. Relationships are a lot easier if neither person has ex-spouses and kids. Exactly. A man without children & ex-wives would be a huge plus. No pets are good, too, because I have my own and there'll be no worries about them not all getting along. Also, I would assume you have a good head on your shoulders and are not impulsive. It shows you really want to be sure about something before you make a commitment. I'm the same way, so I can appreciate this, and I'm sure there are other good women out there who can appreciate it as well. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Brigit_1 Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 There's *definitely* something wrong with me then. Screw having kids Screw dogs Screw anyone who has a problem with how I live I'll take a cat though. Cats are great but you don't like dogs? Not even little ones? Crap you almost made my potential next husband list... 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Gloria25 Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 Most women connect and have a soft spot for a single guy they see that has kids. Go to any little league game on the weekend and see the way women swoon over single dads and their kids. Its also portrayed in countless movies and TV shows. (Art typically imitates life in case you didnt know) Remember - you said "movies and TV shows"... So sorry, in real life - especially now a days with the chaos going on that creates children ("oops pregnancies, chick trapping guys, people shacking up, people not even knowing who they are and/or anything about the person they marry/knocked up), hard for me to look at a guy who is a father and question how healthy his situation is and/or how long it will last. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Male Posted July 14, 2015 Author Share Posted July 14, 2015 (edited) In all honestly, I doubt people even look down on men who are single, middle aged, no kids. Men complain about these type of things, when clearly women who are middle aged, single, no kids have to deal with this kind of crap on a daily basis and doesn't even compare to men. A woman's biological clock is ticking in her mid 30's-after 40 it ain't gonna happen. I assume the majority of women want to have their own kids. Men have to easy-they can gain weight, shed hair, turn 60 and most likely a 25 year old woman can go walking his way. Old men have the option have putting his dick in different vaginas, they can buy hookers. Yet, do you think a 60 year women has the option? No. For a man to get a woman 10-15 years younger than him, it comes easy, for a 60 year old woman, no man younger or older will want her. Men can do fine without have a permanent partner because they have the option of hookers. People will always praise men for having sex with different women. Women are suppose to settle down with 1 man-we don't buy male prostitutes. A man little one's will be potent and strong as ever even when he is 70 and can knock someone up. He will always have that option of having kids-he just needs to find a young, fresh 25 year old to do it with. You are correct. But just because single middle aged women with no kids have it bad, doesnt mean that it wipes out my argument. The prejudices against single middle aged men with no kids still exist. And obviously since I am part of that statistic, thats why I made the thread about it. Exactly. A man without children & ex-wives would be a huge plus. No pets are good, too, because I have my own and there'll be no worries about them not all getting along. Also, I would assume you have a good head on your shoulders and are not impulsive. It shows you really want to be sure about something before you make a commitment. I'm the same way, so I can appreciate this, and I'm sure there are other good women out there who can appreciate it as well. There are other women that appreciate it. I never said there werent. But you and them are in the minority. Because many women "assume" that a middle aged guy with no kids, and especially one thats never been married by 40 must have issues. Edited July 14, 2015 by Male Link to post Share on other sites
autumnnight Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 You are correct. But just because single middle aged women with no kids have it bad, doesnt mean that it wipes out my argument. The prejudices against single middle aged men with no kids still exist. And obviously since I am part of that statistic, thats why I made the thread about it. There are other women that appreciate it. I never said there werent. But you and them are in the minority. Because many women "assume" that a middle aged guy with no kids, and especially one thats never been married by 40 must have issues. I do not assume a man has issues just because he is over 35, never married, and has no kids. If he is socially inept, stubborn, unwilling to examine himself, blameshifts, generalizes, and whines instead of trying to better his situation...THEN I think he probably has issues. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Male Posted July 14, 2015 Author Share Posted July 14, 2015 I do not assume a man has issues just because he is over 35, never married, and has no kids. Thats because you are intelligent, and have a good head on your shoulders. Do you really think ALL women see things the way you do? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Male Posted July 14, 2015 Author Share Posted July 14, 2015 We like things to be "normal" and anything "abnormal" we question, as our experience tells us "If it doesn't sound right then it probably isn't right." and we need reassured before taking any risks. MANY women obviously dont follow any of that advice then because they sure as hell have a terrible track record as far as being reassured that the guy they date isnt another loser just like the last one. From what I see, a lot of women date deadbeat after deadbeat without ever learning from experience. Link to post Share on other sites
Grumpybutfun Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 You are a very negative person in your posts and seem to have a very lacking attitude. Why do I have a feeling that even if you were divorced with ten kids, you would be here complaining about all the women wanting single men with no children? Maybe you need to concentrate on establishing some positivity and happiness in your life...join some groups or clubs or join an intramural sports team or Martial Arts Dojos...anything to get you out of your pity party. I have read some of your threads and this is something you can't solve with focusing on what you think you lack or know or think...because you are probably mostly wrong concerning most people or some people or those people... If you think you know absolutes, you usually know nothing. Good luck, Grumps 2 Link to post Share on other sites
autumnnight Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 Thats because you are intelligent, and have a good head on your shoulders. Do you really think ALL women see things the way you do? Well shucks.... No, I don't. But I think more do than you might think. You probably want to throw rocks at me for saying this but... Just keep trying, and try to just shake off the women who aren't for you. There are good ones out there who won't get hung up on yor status. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SammySammy Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 A few hours ago, I was eating lunch. Reading Love Shack. This thread in particular. A couple walks in - young couple. The girl is stunning. She's about 5' 7", long legs, beautiful dark hair and eyes, natural tan ... seems to be some sort of Latina. The guy ... well ... he's about 5' 5", pale, acne on his face ... he MIGHT weigh 120 pounds. Might. It's 100 degrees outside and this dork has a wool cap on his mop of blond hair. They are obviously into each other. All smiles. Laughing. In their own world. He's walking behind her, grabs her hips and pulls her back into him ... sexual innuendo ... she giggles, turns around, pushes him and they briefly kiss ... all of this while being shown to their table. I look around the restaurant and I'm not the only one ... noticing. Gorgeous girl. Short, geek of a guy. Since we're talking about assumptions .... I know most of them were wondering how the dorkiest guy in the room got the most gorgeous girl in the restaurant. I was thinking ... what's the difference between that guy ... and OP? Hmmm .... I know the answer. Because I've been that guy. Many times. OP, when you figure it out, you'll no longer worry about what women - or anyone else - thinks of you. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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