devilish innocent Posted August 16, 2015 Share Posted August 16, 2015 He's the only one who knows for sure how he feels about his marriage. Just because he says he's unhappy doesn't necessarily mean it's true. It could be his way of stringing you along. You do know this man is a liar. You say you tried to go no contact before and weren't able to. How do you know you'll be able to stop seeing him if things don't change by the end of September? You say you need an intervention. It might not be a bad idea to work with a professional counselor who would know how to break an addiction. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Heatherknows Posted August 16, 2015 Share Posted August 16, 2015 "Now I know I'm being used That's okay, man, 'cause I like the abuse I know she's playing with me That's okay 'cause I got no self esteem We make plans to go out at night I wait 'til 2 then I turn out the light This rejection's got me so low If she keeps it up I just might tell her so" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bueuGw47IG0 For some reason reading your posts made me think of this song. It made me think of me and it made me think of you. We need to improve our self-esteem and boundaries before this world eats us up alive. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author E-Heart Posted August 17, 2015 Author Share Posted August 17, 2015 He's the only one who knows for sure how he feels about his marriage. Just because he says he's unhappy doesn't necessarily mean it's true. It could be his way of stringing you along. You do know this man is a liar. You say you tried to go no contact before and weren't able to. How do you know you'll be able to stop seeing him if things don't change by the end of September? You say you need an intervention. It might not be a bad idea to work with a professional counselor who would know how to break an addiction. I have seen a counselor and I am open to going again for more sessions. I've just had enough and that's how I know that I'll be able to and/or am able to. We both have agreed to end things if he doesn't leave her by that time, but he seems so sure that he will leave her that it doesn't seem to bother him. He says to think of the positive because we have a happy road ahead of us. I'm just hurting and don't want to text him while he's on vacation and hopefully when he comes back he'll have things figured out - he'll have two and a half weeks to get act together! I'm ready to hear "Give me one more month...blah blah blah" and I know I won't allow it. There's really no more excuses that he can give me or that I will accept. He's not putting his life on hold, so I'm not going to do it anymore! Link to post Share on other sites
Author E-Heart Posted August 17, 2015 Author Share Posted August 17, 2015 Second day without MM.... Feeling okay today...feeling a bit numb actually! Trip departure day for him... Wondering just how much fun this trip is going to be for him. Makes me want to puke! Trying to keep busy! Link to post Share on other sites
lemondrop21 Posted August 17, 2015 Share Posted August 17, 2015 The "I've gotten weirdly comfortable in this situation" thing that he said to you disgusts me. I'm sorry he admitted that to you. MM said something similar to me - he told me, twice, that he felt happy with the way things were. Happy. If you can be happy while causing two women huge amounts of pain then there's something wrong with you (even if the wife doesn't know, he is causing harm to her and to the marriage). 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author E-Heart Posted August 17, 2015 Author Share Posted August 17, 2015 The "I've gotten weirdly comfortable in this situation" thing that he said to you disgusts me. I'm sorry he admitted that to you. MM said something similar to me - he told me, twice, that he felt happy with the way things were. Happy. If you can be happy while causing two women huge amounts of pain then there's something wrong with you (even if the wife doesn't know, he is causing harm to her and to the marriage). I know...how do you get comfortable in this situation? Seriously! I've said so many times to him: "You would continue this for years if I would let it continue" and he always denied it. Now he says he's gotten comfortable! His wife is putting the puzzle pieces together as she's been asking him weird questions. All he does is deny deny deny! Actually, I think the puzzle is complete; she just doesn't know if it's real or not! This is another reason to stay away - I don't want them to separate because she found out, I want it to come from him. UGH!!!! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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