How do I stop being so preoccupied with my crushes?

[HansonGirl]

Whenever I meet someone who I am attracted to, I tend to get away too preoccupied. Even when I realize this person is not right for me, that I know it, I still find myself preoccupied by thinking about the person and analyzing stuff. I almost feel like part of me just is bored and it gives me something to think about, until my next crush. A lot of times i downright don't even like the guy any more but I find myself really "involved"

I feel like this means there is something lacking in my own life, like I am bored with my own life. I feel like if i got a hobby (a REAL hobby, not including, obsessing over a guy) or an interest to preoccupy myself, I can easily avoid this.

A lot of times my intentions are good - but then i'll log on facebook and 2 hours will slip through my fingers because i was looking at guys i like. part of me just wants to defriend the guys, to prevent myself from having access to it...and i have done that in the past. But when i have to deal with the person everyday i think if he noticed he and our mutual friends might think that's weird that i defriended him and nobody else. Then even if i had a shot in hell, that will ruin it.

Anyways, i think my preoccupations are just a SIGN of the real problem. The real problem i feel is that I am bored with my life and I have no passion in my life. I also feel like in a way it's a form of escapism. If i don't have a crush, then i will often escape by watching television. It's a way to escape from the reality for a while.

What can I do? I even try to get hobbies and then they don't last because I get bored. I just don't know what to do. I feel like I don't want to waste a minute on a stupid crush, overanalyzing things, speculating, making assumptions. Even when i KNOW I am not going to end up with this person, I get so caught up in it! I know it's messed up and I'd like to stop!

[ird]

I'm exactly like you and wish I knew how to stop. I also use 'escapism' to stop obsessing about things. I do wish I could find some hobbies. Going to the gym doesn't even work.

[casey.lives]

when you like someone it's natural to think of them all the time. u are in the norm. i think what you can do is.. get a concrete statement like: he never loved me .. he just used me. that statement will pull you back in and cut the deeper desire of reconstructing a reality with him. thinking back is helpful but don't concoct fictional possibilities.. that's not helpful. so.. get a statement and when you feel like u went to far... remind yourself: he never loved me, he used me