tessa123 Posted July 21, 2015 Share Posted July 21, 2015 I have been totally in love with a guy for 3 years now and it has made me absolutely miserable. He happens to be one of my best friends, we are constantly around each other, we have all the same friends, and he is the only one who can make me totally happy, I feel empty when he is not there. We both are best friends with each other, and I am very good friends with all of his friends and vice versa, but I view him as more than a friend. There is nothing I want more than to be with him in a relationship, I constantly think about him and I can't stop it, this has been the case for 3 years now. He however, views me as a friend because he has a girlfriend. We have had a brief sexual relationship before, he is very sexually attracted to me, but he ended it and said he did not want to jepordise our friendship if anything bad were to ever happen between us in terms of a relationship, so we went back to being friends. He is totally hung up on his girlfriend, as they have a VERY tempestuous on/off relationship and he views that as a 'passionate' one, and he is hung up on her. I love him so much that I cannot get intimate with anyone else, and it is making me incredibly lonely, and making me doubt myself, asking myself what makes her so much better than me. I know you do not choose who you love, and something is driving him to love her for all this time, but me and him get on so so well, we are best friends and both are attracted to each other, I dont understand. I know he loves a chase, maybe I just didnt give that to him and made it all too easy at the start. I keep trying to figure out ways of cutting all contact with him, its a very very last resort, as i would miss him terribly and be very unhappy without him around, and we also all have the same friends so it would be incredibly difficult, but im not sure that I have a choice, as I dont think I can be happy just being friends with him anymore, and seeing him happy with her. He does not know that I am feeling like this, so it would be very odd if i just randomly cut all contact with him, I am not sure whether I should tell him how I am feeling either though, as I would probably feel stupid about myself, and upset me even more. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 21, 2015 Share Posted July 21, 2015 You don't have to cut all contact but you do need to put a LOT of distance in your present relationship. Good self talk will help: he doesn't like you as more then a friend. Think about the qualities you like in him & go find somebody with those qualities. Once you have a BF of your own, hopefully you will stop pining so much for him Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts