clynn Posted May 5, 2005 Share Posted May 5, 2005 Has anyone had a bad (???) or unconventional start that ended up developing into a relationship? ie: casual sex or casual relationship? or a relationship that started / stopped / started / stopped? Or didn't work out the first time but did eventually? As in weird communication or bad timing at the beginning but eventually figured things out? Link to post Share on other sites
Merin Posted May 5, 2005 Share Posted May 5, 2005 *Merin Thinks* Hmm.. No My relationships always tend to start out slammin.. then go from slammin to sh*tty... from sh*tty to this will work... from this will work to WTF am I doing with this Guy... Crap! The relationship I'm in right now, started out slammin... and we've had ups and downs... I've had My sh*tty times with him and for real wondered more than once WTF I was doing here... but maybe this time I've still got the belief that this will work... Link to post Share on other sites
EC Posted May 5, 2005 Share Posted May 5, 2005 Well when I first met my bf I knew that in three months he would be leaving to School 6 hours away...so I thought he's cute and nice why not just have some fun until he leaves and then just keep in touch? He didnt want anything serious at all and Neither did I. So its started off like whatever but the more we hung out and the more we got to know eachother ..the more we fell in love. Sure we have our ups and downs but we have more ups than we do downs and I think thats what counts. Link to post Share on other sites
binturong Posted May 5, 2005 Share Posted May 5, 2005 DH and I started out just as friends, then friends with benefits. It wasn't until 4 months into the "benefits" period that we realized we wanted to be more than friends. Link to post Share on other sites
Daisydoodles Posted May 6, 2005 Share Posted May 6, 2005 We actually met when we were still married to other people. Started to have feelings for each other. Had to stop seeing each other entirely. We agreed we had to be true to ourselves and make decisions about our own lives without influencing, or being influenced by, each other. Not being able to see each other for so long was very difficult. We both made big changes in our lives so that we could avoid each other. Some time later, he and his wife broke up. 9 months later, I was divorced. That was 2 years ago, and it seems like another lifetime. We're married now, and blissfully happy. I'm married to my friend, my fan, and my soulmate. I never had this kind of a complete relationship with my former husband, who was more of a roommate from the very beginning. Getting to the point where we could be together was incredibly painful and difficult, but it's been entirely worth it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author clynn Posted May 6, 2005 Author Share Posted May 6, 2005 Wow. that's quite a story. I find it quite intriguing that you went through very difficult things independently, not knowing what lie ahead. Good on you both! Link to post Share on other sites
Daisydoodles Posted May 6, 2005 Share Posted May 6, 2005 I never want to go through a period like that again in my life. I just knew how I felt, and what I had to do to get free and feel better. My marriage was the pits. My husband could have easily decided to do the easier thing, and stay married to his former wife. He didn't. When I came out of the hurricane that was my life for years, he was there. It was like sunshine after a long miserable storm. Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted May 12, 2005 Share Posted May 12, 2005 Originally posted by clynn Has anyone had a bad start that ended up developing into a relationship? No, but we've all had the opposite case! Link to post Share on other sites
XNemesisX Posted May 12, 2005 Share Posted May 12, 2005 All of my relationships have started out really great, then deteriorated. If you count being told by my ex's friend's girlf (if that made sense) that he was a psycho, bisexual, pill popping, male cousin loving, mama's boy,weirdo then I guess it started out pretty wonderful besides that information (that yes, ended up being true) hmmm.... Link to post Share on other sites
WithOrWithoutYou Posted May 14, 2005 Share Posted May 14, 2005 Originally posted by Daisydoodles I never want to go through a period like that again in my life. I just knew how I felt, and what I had to do to get free and feel better. My marriage was the pits. My husband could have easily decided to do the easier thing, and stay married to his former wife. He didn't. When I came out of the hurricane that was my life for years, he was there. It was like sunshine after a long miserable storm. Thank you for sharing your story with us. So many people do the easier (for the moment) thing, and stay unhappy, "just because". It kind of warms my heart to hear a story like yours, and it sounds like both of you knew that something good was worth fighting for, and found the courage to take steps to end what was so bad. The fact that the two of you actually got together even after all of that is so great too. I admire you both for having the courage to realize you had made mistakes, correct them and pay for them, do the hard things to make what was wrong right again, and find something really great in the process. I think you should post a thread with your whole story, from start to finish. Others here in similar situations (who are horribly unhappy but afraid or unwilling to end it because it is easier not to, or because they want their kids to see them unhappy everyday and together rather than apart) might see your post, and draw some inspiration from it. Sometimes things are worth saving, but sometimes, something really bad just has to end before you can even figure out what good can happen. You realized this, and acted upon it. Again, congratulations to you both. Link to post Share on other sites
innerconflict Posted May 17, 2005 Share Posted May 17, 2005 Our relationship started really slow. Both getting over previous exes when we met. Took things casually, he stood me up twice. After the second time, he apologized profusely (he got in late from work and was afraid to call by that time). He promised to make it up to me, so we went out the following night. From there on, we have become an awesome couple. It has been six months and now living together. After many talks, we share a lot of experiences, views, and interests. We do have minor ups and downs, but learn from each other which makes us closer. So overall, I can say that it was bad timing for us. And all I can say that this one is a keeper. Link to post Share on other sites
Treasa Posted May 17, 2005 Share Posted May 17, 2005 My current relationship shouldn't have lasted as long as it has. Let's see....I was in limping-along relationship nearing its end when I met my current boyfriend. I broke up with my now-ex and started dating my current about a week later. In other words, a rebound. Then my current boyfriend proceeded to break up with me and/or have doubts three or fours time in the first five months. We got back together in October after our last breakup in September, and since then everything has been peachy. Well, relatively so. He's the type that loves to hunt, so the more I do with my own life, the more he pursues me. It can be a balancing act, since I used to be really clingy, but it's working out pretty well. Link to post Share on other sites
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