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can someone explain the NC thing to me?


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too_risky

Can someone explain the NC thing to me? How is it done correctly? What is it supposed to do? Doesn't it just give that person more time to spend with someone else and forget all about you? Does it make them come back or miss you?

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ConfusedInOC
Originally posted by too_risky

Can someone explain the NC thing to me? How is it done correctly? What is it supposed to do? Doesn't it just give that person more time to spend with someone else and forget all about you? Does it make them come back or miss you?

 

I can't find it right now, but there's an educational thread on no contact that will answer all your questions. Anyone have the link?

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FYI....NC IS THE ONE CONSOLATION THE DUMPED PARTY HAS! Does it mean that this gives them time to spend with someone else???? GET PERSPECTIVE....they left you, that means they wanted to spend time with someone else obviously or the two of you would still be dating. I can tell you that when I finally (after months of talking to my ex who left me, and then left me feeling sh***y everytime we hung up the phone), I finally put NC into play. Yes I worried that when I did not return his late night calls, his emails, his IMs, text messages, etc. that he would find another girl and forget me. You know what? WHEN I CUT HIM OUT.....HE TRIED HARDER. Instead of a phone call and then an email, I would get a text message, etc. The NC enabled me to move on with my life. I created memories that did not involve him. Besides, you cannot completely de-commit and there will always be a sense of obligation to a person who did not love you enough to stick around as long as there is contact. CUT THEM OFF!!!!! WALK AWAY WITH PRIDE....this = NC!

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too_risky

Thank you all so much for your NC advice. It's been a real eye opener. It's soooo hard to stick to but it's been 4 days since the last time I caved in and left him a message on his cell. He never called back of course. Each day is a new beginning, I have to keep telling myself that and I have to admit, it feels better than knowing he is with someone else and what they are doing. As they say, "what you don't know can't hurt you". Thank you all again. I'm new to this website but have found it such great therapy. I hope I can help others they way you all have helped me.

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