hotgurl Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 My diet was done under strict supervision by my regular physician, because it is a bit extreme, and can lead to serious complications if they are not caught early. Initially, he put me on a 12 week 800 calorie per day liquid diet. It was essentially a liquid version of the Atkins Diet "on steroids". Pretty much ZERO carbs for 12 week! The first week, I thought I was going to die as my body adjusted to ketosis. I worked out every day during those 12 weeks also, and I lost 60lbs during this time. Once the liquid diet was over, I've adopted a very low carb life style. I will not recommend anyone do what I've done, but it has worked for me. Reducing carbs and physical activity is the key to loosing and maintaining weight loss. 60 pounds in 12 weeks! that is extreme. I think starting slow is key for most people. Just say I will walk 1/2 hour today. And tomorrow do the same thing. Build up to bigger changes. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Keenly Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 I think you want your husband to live life and see life exactly the way you do, but that is an unfair and unrealistic expectation. He is his own person. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
KalmOne Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 My diet was done under strict supervision by my regular physician, because it is a bit extreme, and can lead to serious complications if they are not caught early. Initially, he put me on a 12 week 800 calorie per day liquid diet. It was essentially a liquid version of the Atkins Diet "on steroids". Pretty much ZERO carbs for 12 week! The first week, I thought I was going to die as my body adjusted to ketosis. I worked out every day during those 12 weeks also, and I lost 60lbs during this time. Once the liquid diet was over, I've adopted a very low carb life style. I will not recommend anyone do what I've done, but it has worked for me. Reducing carbs and physical activity is the key to loosing and maintaining weight loss. It sounds like something that would work. Link to post Share on other sites
Trimmer Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 The marriage is pretty much useless at this point... Yes, I do have a lack of compassion and empathy at this point. I won't go into details on here, but I have my reasons why. You are wasting your time and energy worrying about this video issue. It's a symptom of a symptom of a symptom, and by zooming in and focusing on that issue, you are missing/avoiding the much larger problems you guys have. And you look ridiculous arguing with each other on a public forum. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
KalmOne Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 I think you want your husband to live life and see life exactly the way you do, but that is an unfair and unrealistic expectation. He is his own person. I am willing to mold my life to make my wife happy but often it does feel like she wants me to live her life with her and not us live our lives together. I have actually said this exact thing. Link to post Share on other sites
Author HannahRose Posted July 23, 2015 Author Share Posted July 23, 2015 I think you want your husband to live life and see life exactly the way you do, but that is an unfair and unrealistic expectation. He is his own person. Completely untrue. I want to be cared for a respected. I want him to care about my feelings and treat me kindly. As far as the religious aspect of it, he presented himself as a similarly religious person. He claimed to feel the same way I do about certain touchy topics, but now I am wondering if he wasn't being truthful, which is unfair. Link to post Share on other sites
hotgurl Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 I think this is going to be a problem in discussing this with people with such differing perspectives on what is sinful or moral. If he is doing something sinful, the pastor should tell him, but you obviously don't agree wit that. It is helpful (at least from our religious perspective) because if he is sinning, it should be brought to light and repented of. If you are not of the same religious perspective, can you at least agree that he shouldn't be willing to do something that hurts his wife? what is acceptable in a marriage is negotiated between the couple in that marriage. But as far as the pastor goes. The way you said it was not I am worried about your sin and our relationship. It was more of just wait until I tell the pastor. Like a little kid tattling on their sibling. Also your husband may have different views than you on sin and religion. Link to post Share on other sites
KalmOne Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 You are wasting your time and energy worrying about this video issue. It's a symptom of a symptom of a symptom, and by zooming in and focusing on that issue, you are missing/avoiding the much larger problems you guys have. And you look ridiculous arguing with each other on a public forum. This is about has private as an actual private conversation could be for me. No one I will ever meet or know will ever see it. Kind of like interactive messaging where the system chimes in. Link to post Share on other sites
Author HannahRose Posted July 23, 2015 Author Share Posted July 23, 2015 You are wasting your time and energy worrying about this video issue. It's a symptom of a symptom of a symptom, and by zooming in and focusing on that issue, you are missing/avoiding the much larger problems you guys have. And you look ridiculous arguing with each other on a public forum. I don't even know what the main issue is, if there is one. There are so many issues to deal with, I don't know where to start. I know we look like fools arguing on the internet. I tried to back out of it when my personal email was posted on here, but he just manipulated me back into the conversation with the post that followed. This is absolutely insane. Link to post Share on other sites
LoveMachine67 Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 60 pounds in 12 weeks! that is extreme. I think starting slow is key for most people. Just say I will walk 1/2 hour today. And tomorrow do the same thing. Build up to bigger changes. I'd agree with you completely, except my will power is crap and my employer pays for all of my meals. My diet was drastic, I will admit that. But it was my physician that recommended it and supervised it. I had to report to his office every Monday morning for 12 weeks to have my vitals checked and blood work done. Essentially, it was controlled starvation, well not exactly. The liquid shakes I drank contained 100% of my daily vitamins and essential nutrients. Imagine loosing weight so fast that you have to retire your entire wardrobe in 6 weeks, and then do it all over again 6 weeks later... This is the only way "I" could have ever reached my weight goal. Link to post Share on other sites
Trimmer Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 This is about has private as an actual private conversation could be for me. No one I will ever meet or know will ever see it. Kind of like interactive messaging where the system chimes in. No, it's anonymous. It is very much not private. You are still exposing each other in front of a crowd of other real people - with all the interpersonal dynamics that go with such an "observed" interaction - and it will be available for public view, now and forever more. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
KalmOne Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 I don't even know what the main issue is, if there is one. There are so many issues to deal with, I don't know where to start. I know we look like fools arguing on the internet. I tried to back out of it when my personal email was posted on here, but he just manipulated me back into the conversation with the post that followed. This is absolutely insane. If you would ever have a normal conversation without being so angry you are going to explode we wouldn't be on here. Also what is the point of going on a random forum anyway? It seems kind of BS to go somewhere and express only your point of view and get answers to something that is so one sided. It is probably a lot more helpful for people to know a whole situation before they attempt to give insightful advice. That's just me though. Link to post Share on other sites
Author HannahRose Posted July 23, 2015 Author Share Posted July 23, 2015 what is acceptable in a marriage is negotiated between the couple in that marriage. But as far as the pastor goes. The way you said it was not I am worried about your sin and our relationship. It was more of just wait until I tell the pastor. Like a little kid tattling on their sibling. Also your husband may have different views than you on sin and religion. No, I wasn't doing that. The point of this whole post was to know if it was inappropriate for a married man to watch that video. A good person to ask would have been the pastor, but that would embarrass him more than me asking here. I was doing him a favor, or at least I thought I was. If his religious views on sin and religion are different than mine, then he has lied to me. This is about has private as an actual private conversation could be for me. No one I will ever meet or know will ever see it. Kind of like interactive messaging where the system chimes in. What does that even mean?? Link to post Share on other sites
Author HannahRose Posted July 23, 2015 Author Share Posted July 23, 2015 I'd agree with you completely, except my will power is crap and my employer pays for all of my meals. My diet was drastic, I will admit that. But it was my physician that recommended it and supervised it. I had to report to his office every Monday morning for 12 weeks to have my vitals checked and blood work done. Essentially, it was controlled starvation, well not exactly. The liquid shakes I drank contained 100% of my daily vitamins and essential nutrients. Imagine loosing weight so fast that you have to retire your entire wardrobe in 6 weeks, and then do it all over again 6 weeks later... This is the only way "I" could have ever reached my weight goal. Where did you get this drink? Or how did you make it? Link to post Share on other sites
jwi71 Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 I thought post #91 was fascinating. I wonder how that happened? I wonder.... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Keenly Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 If you would ever have a normal conversation without being so angry you are going to explode we wouldn't be on here. Also what is the point of going on a random forum anyway? It seems kind of BS to go somewhere and express only your point of view and get answers to something that is so one sided. It is probably a lot more helpful for people to know a whole situation before they attempt to give insightful advice. That's just me though. I understand your frustrated, but don't use words like ever or never. Let's both of you step back from your emotions for a second. Him: you've agreed to try alternate trigger videos. Her: for this specific issue, does this sound like a reasonable compromise? Or do you feel he needs some sort of punishment for disobeying you? Him: let her speak her mind without getting defensive. You will have your turn to say what's on your minD. Don't get defensive. Don't attack eachother. Focus on this one issue specifically. Go? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author HannahRose Posted July 23, 2015 Author Share Posted July 23, 2015 I thought post #91 was fascinating. I wonder how that happened? I wonder.... Ha, ha!! I was wondering if anyone would notice that. Link to post Share on other sites
Keenly Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 I thought post #91 was fascinating. I wonder how that happened? I wonder.... Very vigilant my friend. Very vigilant. Taken for a ride, we are. Link to post Share on other sites
Trimmer Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 Very vigilant my friend. Very vigilant. Taken for a ride, we are. I'm a little slow today - could you spell this out, please? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
LoveMachine67 Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 Where did you get this drink? Or how did you make it? I'm sending you a PM now. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author HannahRose Posted July 23, 2015 Author Share Posted July 23, 2015 I understand your frustrated, but don't use words like ever or never. Let's both of you step back from your emotions for a second. Him: you've agreed to try alternate trigger videos. Her: for this specific issue, does this sound like a reasonable compromise? Or do you feel he needs some sort of punishment for disobeying you? Him: let her speak her mind without getting defensive. You will have your turn to say what's on your minD. Don't get defensive. Don't attack eachother. Focus on this one issue specifically. Go? For this specific issue, yes that is a reasonable compromise. If we drag the rest of the relationship into it, it only MIGHT be acceptable because he regularly comes up with solutions to problems and then he never follows through on them. We really have to look at the rest of the relationship, or we are just coming up with an artificial "fix" to the problem. Like a band-aid on a bullet wound (yes, I was just listening to Taylor Swift). It's just not going to work if he is saying he will do otherwise and then just gets better at deleting history. The HUGE problem is him sending me to bed at my "bedtime" so he can be alone to watch youtube videos, please himself, and then sleep on a couch. He has said it's easier to please himself than do the deed in the past. He seems to LIKE this arrangement and is scares and hurts me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author HannahRose Posted July 23, 2015 Author Share Posted July 23, 2015 Very vigilant my friend. Very vigilant. Taken for a ride, we are. Wait, now I'm lost. You weren't taken for a ride. ???? I just thought KalmOne was going to try to make fun of me and call me crazy for appearing to talk to myself. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
KalmOne Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 Wait, now I'm lost. You weren't taken for a ride. ???? I just thought KalmOne was going to try to make fun of me and call me crazy for appearing to talk to myself. I thought that is what was being referred to but I was not sure. Link to post Share on other sites
autumnnight Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 I hope there was no big break through on the last couple of pages, because I just couldn't make myself finish. Hannah, it sound like your husband is selfish and lazy and using insomnia and depression as an excuse. You meanwhile seem to be uptight, legalistic, and a sexual refuser with a...met phobia? (what is that?) I just don't see anything compatible here. Both of you need some SERIOUS work and neither of you are wiling to do any. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Keenly Posted July 23, 2015 Share Posted July 23, 2015 I hope there was no big break through on the last couple of pages, because I just couldn't make myself finish. Hannah, it sound like your husband is selfish and lazy and using insomnia and depression as an excuse. You meanwhile seem to be uptight, legalistic, and a sexual refuser with a...met phobia? (what is that?) I just don't see anything compatible here. Both of you need some SERIOUS work and neither of you are wiling to do any. But wait... You forgot the most important part of the thread. Are asmr videos legit? Lol 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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