anna121 Posted July 29, 2015 Share Posted July 29, 2015 I agree that it's best not to get into a lot of drama at the demise of a relationship...BUT cancelling a trip at the last minute is a bastard move, especially if it means OP is out $$$. not sure ignoring THAT is warranted. Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted July 29, 2015 Share Posted July 29, 2015 (edited) I agree that it's best not to get into a lot of drama at the demise of a relationship...BUT cancelling a trip at the last minute is a bastard move, especially if it means OP is out $$$. not sure ignoring THAT is warranted. Fair enough....I just don't get the point of lashing back though. I mean what does she hope to gain by lashing out at him like a psycho chick? Hurting him back, making him feel guilty? Does she actually think he's gonna care? No he won't, he doesn't give a shyt which is why he dumped her in the first place. Lashing out, striking back is a futile waste of energy (he does not care)... and will only make her appear like an unbalanced histrionic psycho, thus justifying in his mind why it was best he break up with her. Granted he was a bastard - but why give him the satisfaction of knowing she's all broken up over it? In these situations, ignoring is the ultimate insult, and will say a lot more than lashing back and harsh words ever would. Edited July 30, 2015 by katiegrl 2 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted July 30, 2015 Share Posted July 30, 2015 I am Hurt! And he should know how his actions hurt me! He can't go around hurting people like this and have no consequenses for his actions! So what are you going to do? Burn his house down? Slash his tires? Boil his bunny? Go to his job and put on a performance? He's not going around hurting people. He decided it was good policy to limit his interaction with you. Sorry if that truth hurts, but it is what it is and that's all it is. If he owes you money, then if its between $2.5k - 15k, depending upon what state you're in, take him to small claims court. 50-State Chart of Small Claims Court Dollar Limits | Nolo.com Most of us have had a douche-bag do this to us. Yes, it's cowardly--no doubt about it, and it hurts like all eff, but girl, you need to maintain your grace and dignity and not spiral down like this. Whatever he did, he doesn't deserve to know he got to you to the point where you lost your dignity. Go cry--do what you need to do that is healthy and legal to get this out of your system, pick yourself up and find someone else. Not every man is like this. Next time, the very minute things stop adding up, you need to drop him off at the mall and keep going. You don't need a chicken isht coward who can't tell you to your face that he's not the one. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
RoseVille Posted July 30, 2015 Share Posted July 30, 2015 He made reservations that were non-refundable for him, and YOU are the one upset, calling him, texting him, going to his house, cursing him out? I can't believe he would do this to me! After all, HE was the one who kept asking me to come on this trip...And he was evening making reservations as late as yesterday afternoon for this trip. And all of those reservations are non refundable... I am calling into question everything he has ever said to me. I called and texted him several times this evening and he's not answering. I even went to his house. He didn't answer although I know he was there....This is bullshyt. He finally responded to my text this afternoon after I sent a second one cursing him out and telling him it was over. He was nonconfrontational and just said my text was disrespectful and I don't know what came up that caused him to cancel the trip. I told him that was bs and nothing came up, he just didnt want to go and did this on purpose to hurt me. He didn't argue or reply back after that. Do you know why he cancelled the trip? Or are you just LEAPING to conclusions? Link to post Share on other sites
Space Ritual Posted July 30, 2015 Share Posted July 30, 2015 I thought I would cut this off at 6 pages...man I must be slipping. We went to Seven? Anyone up for 8. I'll fall off the wagon if we go beyond that. Elle, I am gonna be nice here and just suggest that instead of playing this out in the court of L/S that if this is all true you seek your justice in small claims court. This is simply bordering on the absurd. You don't have to convince us, convince a judge! Link to post Share on other sites
SummerDreams Posted July 30, 2015 Share Posted July 30, 2015 I think the best solution is somewhere in the middle here. He acted like an a@#$% and he should know that this woman is hurt and angry and that his actions have consequences. But the truth is the OP overreacted a bit. What I would choose to do is call him and express to him my opinion about him in a calm way, after I've heard his side of the story. But the truth is that player type of guys need to have a lesson that they can't play with women's hearts. OP, next time pay attention to the red flags and don't proceed with a relationship. 5 years without a relationship is too much. "Main girl" phrase is a no no. Etc, you know better what these red flags are. Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted July 30, 2015 Share Posted July 30, 2015 I think the best solution is somewhere in the middle here. He acted like an a@#$% and he should know that this woman is hurt and angry and that his actions have consequences. But the truth is the OP overreacted a bit. What I would choose to do is call him and express to him my opinion about him in a calm way, after I've heard his side of the story. But the truth is that player type of guys need to have a lesson that they can't play with women's hearts. OP, next time pay attention to the red flags and don't proceed with a relationship. 5 years without a relationship is too much. "Main girl" phrase is a no no. Etc, you know better what these red flags are. I dare say that by now, he knows that OP is angry and the consequences of his actions aren't for OP to lose her mind and wind up in orange pajamas, courtesy of the county jail. And exactly what kind of a lesson do you suggest where OP won't wind up in civil or criminal court? She'd better hope he hasn't sworn out an RO against her for her performance last night. He already knows everything that OP would waste her time calling to tell him---he just didn't respond to the text she sent him. And they can't play with a heart that isn't given up in exchange for something they never agreed upon giving back. Let's not forget what OP said about this involvement of hers: we're not exclusive yet because I'm waiting for my subscription to expire in September, then we will talk about exclusivity then. She wasn't owed a relationship with this guy. She gave every indication that she really wasn't interested in exclusivity to him, so he took her cue. Now she wants to flip the script and it blew up in her lap. Sending mixed signals has a tendency to do that. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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