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wandering eyes in a relationship?


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hi. as some of you may know i was once in a friends-almost-boyfriend/girlfriend stage with an old best friend (guy). he started dating another girl who was acceptable by his parents, i got discouraged and felt cheated and so left him.

 

i felt too hurt to just stay his friend and see him with this new girl, especially when he was saying boyfriend/girlfriend stuff to me for so long. he thought i was mad at him and out of fear stayed away, didn't call me either.

 

this new girl cheated on him, i didn't know, and then he rebounded and started dating another girl, a family friend.

 

when i found out, two years had passed, and i thought i needed to tell him that i actually was not mad at him and that i really did have feelings for him all along, i wanted to know his feelings too. he told me he loved me all along but thought i was mad at him, and didn't know what he wanted (was pressured by his family, etc) when he first started dating the other girl.

 

but unfortunately, by the time i told him all this, he was already in too deep with his current girlfriend. he said that he could not just leave her, as she had supported him through a lot of crap he was going through. we both thought it would hurt us too much just to 'stay friends' and decided time apart would be best, he told me we may meet later on in life.

 

so now i find out he has joined an online friend-finder website (sometimes used for dating too) where he says he's interested in friendship. he knew that i was a member too. i sent him a message and he quickly responded, asking how i was. since then, no contact.

 

my question is, why is he part of such a website? is he unsettled with his current girlfriend?

 

also, in the back of my mind i hope that he will grow strong enough too break apart from what his family wants him to do, and remember how much of a good thing we had going.... but do you think that will ever happen? we have so much more in common than he and his girlfriend does; our mutual friends have agreed on this.

 

what do you think?

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laRubiaBonita

i think if he was interested in you as any more than a friend, he would have said so by now.

 

you told him your feelings, which had not changed in two years, so one would think that your feelings were currently the same or very similar.....So i would think if he want you as more he would say.

 

personally, you do not even sound like THAT great of friends. In your post, all the info on him you say you have "found out", meaning to me, that you have not actually spoken with him.

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hi, thanks for your reply. just for clarification, i "found out" when he told me he had looked me up and read my profile.

 

also we were really close, he has told my friends that i was one of his best friends. this was when i was mad at him. he tried talking to me through my friends but never to my face, so that's when i went to him (a year later) to find out how he truly felt about me, but it was too late.

 

he said he wished i told him i had feelings for him then, because he was never clear.

 

does this stand a second chance? what is the possibility, given this type of situation.... :eek:

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