Well she did it, pulled the trigger. Here i go again!

[mightycpa]

Ffs man! I'm starting to see the folly. I'm no mug trust me, but it seemed right at the time. I don't judge people to turn out like this early on. I did what I did for us, to try and make life easier and the life we were planning. WE WERE PLANNING. That's what you do. Trust and all that. It wasn't a lot, buy I can't afford to walk away from it in my current situ. If I could I'd *** it off.

 

Sometimes man you come across a little direct and condescending. Glad you've got ya **** together by being slightly sarcastic and detached? Been involved in this situation yourself, with this kinda person? You dealt with it all logically, right?

 

Only trying to find a way through this.

Yeah, I don't cut people a lot of slack who treat me like **** if that's what you mean. Yes, I can be quite direct. oh, you meant him! Yeah, he can be a prick, right? Oh, you meant him... yeah, he can be a prick, right? I thought you meant me!

 

I still don't understand. Why can't you just go get the car without asking?

 

It is a serious question.

Edited August 3, 2015 by mightycpa

[sacg]

I'll take your word for it that it is your car. In the US, we have something called a TITLE, that's how it becomes your car, doesn't matter if you paid for it or not. When we say "it's in her name", over here, it means the TITLE, aka "PROOF OF OWNERSHIP" bears her name.

 

This might come in pretty handy in the event that the property might get you involved in legal jeopardy... :-)

 

Or what about if you sell a car to someone who you know keeps horrible records... you just wait a year, and then claim the car, right? Keep your receipts from when you purchased it? Wow! That would be quite a scam... you could make tons of money off of ADHD people!

 

Ok, back to your problem.... Why don't you just go over there and get it, and drive it away, and change the paperwork? It's yours, and you can prove it? Then can't you just do whatever you want with it, whenever you want? What's the issue, exactly?

 

Lol

Seriously? I don't have keys. I don't want to be an *******. I don't want to cause grief to her daughter. I don't want to get entangled in legalities if possible. I don't have a licence atm. Whole bunch of ****. But mainly, I just expected it to be resolved amicably. The word she keeps using to no effect.

[mightycpa]

Lol

Seriously? I don't have keys. I don't want to be an *******. I don't want to cause grief to her daughter. I don't want to get entangled in legalities if possible. I don't have a licence atm. Whole bunch of ****. But mainly, I just expected it to be resolved amicably. The word she keeps using to no effect.

You're not going to like my advice. Go to the dealer and get a key. Go get the car at night, and inform the local authorities before you go.

 

Either that, or have your car towed to the local dealer, so they can create a key for you. Inform the local authorities when the car gets towed.

 

The reason you're not going to like that is because you are still in "whip me, beat me, call me Sally!" mode. You are trying to accommodate her needs without really having much regard for your own. I'm sure they have taxis and buses and car dealerships and all sorts of modern conveyances and amenities over there in the UK. She's a grown woman in a Western civilization? She can figure it out. Give her some credit.

 

Just the words that you use betray your state of mind...

cause grief to her daughter

when you really mean

cause inconvenience to the mother, my ex

don't you? Because any child who can get worked up over you taking your car should also be old enough to understand that it is YOUR car. If she can't, then her mother didn't do a very good job.

 

As for legal troubles, it would be cheaper for her to get a car than it would to involve the two of you in some legal battle that she is sure to lose. Just tell the local authorities what you're going to do, then go do it, and be completely done with this.

Edited August 3, 2015 by mightycpa

[Bigmiked]

Sacg, I'm a little late to respond but your ex sounds like mine. I ended a marriage to be with her. She had many red flags while having affair but I just thought it was because I was still married. Anyway the 1.5 years we were together we're filled with trivial arguments, silent treatments , her always being critical, insecurity , jealousy etc.. It wasn't until a week or so ago I found out about BPD. Now that I look back she exhibited almost all the traits. In our last talk she basically blamed me for everything. Said she doesn't need me and didn't think I loved her . It's like she forgot I got divorced for her. That was over a month ago. We haven't spoken since. Like you I was devastated . But it does get better. Helps to see a therapist also. Good luck. What works for me is to just think of how bad she treated me.