Author regine_phalange Posted August 3, 2015 Author Share Posted August 3, 2015 lol, i tried this once. i just completely, 100% out-of-the-blue kissed a guy i found attractive. we'd been chatting at a local coffee place for a few months and he seemed interested but shy. he was gay, as it turns out. it was mortifying, probably one of my worst memories ever. i just went for it - big time - and he was so stunned he couldn't kiss back. Hahaha. Out of the blue, you mean without wrapping your arms around his neck before, or without him touching you otherwise? Don't worry! The best kiss ever was from someone I didn't like at all and he kissed me out of the blue as well. I didn't want to see him again but I still remember what an awesome kisser he was (I didn't kiss back either, I was shocked by how unexpected it was and also by how good it was). 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Veb Posted August 3, 2015 Share Posted August 3, 2015 Oh, wow! That's a great post about your experiences! So after all he may not really be interested, he may be just flirting. Because he doesn't really chat me up! Even though the first times he asked me some questions about myself (how old am I, what do I do, etc). But I was a bit nervous and in pain and didn't really continue the conversation. Maybe I gave off unavailable vibes (I do give them off often, damn it!). Or maybe he's taken. Did you have conversations with your dentist? It's difficult to talk with this sucking device in the mouth (the one for the saliva ). We don't have dental hygienists where I live, the dentist does all the job and he has a helper to clean and hand him the dental tools, book the appointments etc. What happened in the end with your dentist, did he make his interest more clear or did you just ignore his invitation to his venue and that was it? I hope mine had a venue, but he's only at the office, 9am-9pm. I am very relaxed in medical settings, since I work in the field, so my body language shows that. I also chat with the assistants/nurses and joke around with them. Maybe try getting in a very relaxed, fun mood before you get there. He would really notice that, since it is the opposite of other patient interactions. If you work in medicine and deal with suffering, tense patients it really brightens your day when you encounter a relaxed, fun person! Brighten his day, by being happy, fun. If a man feels very good around you, he will want to see you more, think about you, will want to spend more time with you. With the dentist it was his escalation of spending more and more time just talking to me, sending his nurses out of the room, plus his repeated mentioning of this venue, which made me finally aware he was interested in me. I am a bit slow! He also gave me his home number and looked deeply into my eyes, while holding my hand. This was going on for many months. If you want to see him more often, then make more appointments, if you want to get to know him a bit better. In my case I had serious medical issues at the time, so I needed to see him daily, for a couple of weeks, then less. Personally I would want to see interest from him first, but I am a chicken... I think you can ask him out any time, but it would help if he showed signs of interest. Doctors get hit on all the time, so they know how to handle it. My approach has been to let them show me their interest in me first, then I decide if I am interested in them. Usually I chose to stay their patient rather then getting to know them personally. They were quite upset when I did not reciprocate their interest, but eventually got over it. I am not good at all in asking a man out, so I am really hoping to learn from you here! I am almost finished with my treatment and this doctor is very interested, as am I, but I get all nervous and weird when we get closer. I have strong feelings for him and now I act strangely around him! So I am interested in how you are asking your dentist out! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author regine_phalange Posted August 4, 2015 Author Share Posted August 4, 2015 I'm chicken too! Nevertheless, I also can't ask him out before having some kind of more "intimate" conversation (and before finding out whether he;s single!). I haven't been open towards him until now, and I know I have a closed-off vibe many times, even when I don't mean to. I also started getting awkward around him and it's hard to even look him in the eyes now. But I'll have to observe him to see how he responds. If I read "meh" body language and we have "meh" intimate conversation, then I may not end up asking him out. But if he is available and he is showing interest back, then I'll mention the event I'll be attending alone and whether he'd like to come too (I'll schedule the appointment before an event I'd attend anyways). That's as far as I'd go. To be honest though, I'm not that positive. I discussed this with a guy friend yesterday and he told me that he's probably not that interested. So I'm keeping that in mind. I kind of get why my friend believes this. Just want to see what happens if I limit my unavailable/nervous vibes. I hope you and your doctor end up together! Keep me updated with your news! I'll keep you updated as well. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden2 Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 Could you leave a note at the desk for him? "Private and personal". Look serious as you leave it, so they don't have a clue as to the contents. But ask if he would like a Raki and mezes, or coffee and loukumades...... You promise you'll brush your teeth afterwards! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author regine_phalange Posted August 4, 2015 Author Share Posted August 4, 2015 Could you leave a note at the desk for him? "Private and personal". Look serious as you leave it, so they don't have a clue as to the contents. But ask if he would like a Raki and mezes, or coffee and loukumades...... You promise you'll brush your teeth afterwards! Hahaha, no, I'd rather ask him out verbally because I need to see his spontaneous reaction. I actually wanted to bring him sweets from my birthplace because the last time he didn't charge me. He can give sweets as a treat to his patients after getting the work done Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden2 Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 A Dentist giving out sweets just maintains his patient portfolio....! Carrot sticks or an apple, I could understand...! Yes, take him something to eat..... and say you can share it over coffee after he gets out of work! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 He didn't charge you for your last treatment? Heh, just ask him out. Shooting fish in a barrel. If professional boundaries aren't an issue in your culture or with this dentist, you'll know soon enough. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author regine_phalange Posted August 4, 2015 Author Share Posted August 4, 2015 He didn't charge, but maybe he didn't think it was a big deal of a treatment. He just put a material on my tooth so it would be less sensitive with cold, took less than 5 minutes. I don't read too much into it, he's probably generous with all his patients, maybe that's why many of them love him. Link to post Share on other sites
newmoon Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 Hahaha. Out of the blue, you mean without wrapping your arms around his neck before, or without him touching you otherwise? Don't worry! The best kiss ever was from someone I didn't like at all and he kissed me out of the blue as well. I didn't want to see him again but I still remember what an awesome kisser he was (I didn't kiss back either, I was shocked by how unexpected it was and also by how good it was). yep, there had been ZERO contact to that point. i just went for it and kinda grabbed him and .. ugh... mortifying. you *think* a guy would respond back, and they get all macho and say they would know exactly what to do if a woman 'attacked' them that way but, oddly, they are so shocked it ends up where they can't really respond. looks good in movies, lol. do not try at home! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden2 Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 yep, there had been ZERO contact to that point. i just went for it and kinda grabbed him and .. ugh... mortifying. you *think* a guy would respond back, and they get all macho and say they would know exactly what to do if a woman 'attacked' them that way but, oddly, they are so shocked it ends up where they can't really respond. looks good in movies, lol. do not try at home! You could always add, "Well, it works in the movies!" and laugh.... Their loss. Even if he's gay, he should have been flattered.... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Veb Posted August 5, 2015 Share Posted August 5, 2015 I'm chicken too! Nevertheless, I also can't ask him out before having some kind of more "intimate" conversation (and before finding out whether he;s single!). I haven't been open towards him until now, and I know I have a closed-off vibe many times, even when I don't mean to. I also started getting awkward around him and it's hard to even look him in the eyes now. But I'll have to observe him to see how he responds. If I read "meh" body language and we have "meh" intimate conversation, then I may not end up asking him out. But if he is available and he is showing interest back, then I'll mention the event I'll be attending alone and whether he'd like to come too (I'll schedule the appointment before an event I'd attend anyways). That's as far as I'd go. To be honest though, I'm not that positive. I discussed this with a guy friend yesterday and he told me that he's probably not that interested. So I'm keeping that in mind. I kind of get why my friend believes this. Just want to see what happens if I limit my unavailable/nervous vibes. I hope you and your doctor end up together! Keep me updated with your news! I'll keep you updated as well. Try to be positive, be happy and fake it if you have to! It helps! Spending more time being around him and making him see your sparkling personality can help! I need to see definite interest from the man, before I decide if he is interesting to me, so it has been a bit different for me. See if he flirts with you. Teases you. Make sure that you do what you feel is right. Other people can try and help by giving their opinion, but in the end it is you, who knows what is right for you! Take your time. Being happy in your life, that is good for you and very attractive to men, so make sure to be good to yourself and make your dreams come true, for yourself. My update: had appointment, which went very well on all levels. Medically, intellectually and personally. Lots of teasing, banter and stimulating exchanges. He needed help with his health issues and I could treat him as well while having my appointment. He will be making an appointment with me, to see me after hours, for his next treatment and I should be finished soon with my own treatments and hopefully get to know him a bit better. Will keep you informed of any happenings and hope to hear from you! Just make sure to really be happy with yourself, regardless of what happens with him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
sweeeeetie82 Posted August 6, 2015 Share Posted August 6, 2015 Be prepared to find a new dentist, if you decide to ask him out! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted August 9, 2015 Share Posted August 9, 2015 What's the progress with him so far? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author regine_phalange Posted August 9, 2015 Author Share Posted August 9, 2015 What's the progress with him so far? Hey, thanks for asking. I'll go back in about month. He's on vacation now, as I am. Try to be positive, be happy and fake it if you have to! It helps! Spending more time being around him and making him see your sparkling personality can help! I need to see definite interest from the man, before I decide if he is interesting to me, so it has been a bit different for me. See if he flirts with you. Teases you. Make sure that you do what you feel is right. Other people can try and help by giving their opinion, but in the end it is you, who knows what is right for you! Take your time. Being happy in your life, that is good for you and very attractive to men, so make sure to be good to yourself and make your dreams come true, for yourself. My update: had appointment, which went very well on all levels. Medically, intellectually and personally. Lots of teasing, banter and stimulating exchanges. He needed help with his health issues and I could treat him as well while having my appointment. He will be making an appointment with me, to see me after hours, for his next treatment and I should be finished soon with my own treatments and hopefully get to know him a bit better. Will keep you informed of any happenings and hope to hear from you! Just make sure to really be happy with yourself, regardless of what happens with him. AWW :-) Hey, you can use my idea of asking him out, he seems to be totally into it. I'm not that happy these days, but happiness is not a constant feeling anyways. But hey, one hearty smile and some eye gazing and I'll be happy for a week! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted August 14, 2015 Share Posted August 14, 2015 Hey, thanks for asking. I'll go back in about month. He's on vacation now, as I am. AWW :-) Hey, you can use my idea of asking him out, he seems to be totally into it. I'm not that happy these days, but happiness is not a constant feeling anyways. But hey, one hearty smile and some eye gazing and I'll be happy for a week! Hope it turns out great, because it can serve as a great example that its okay for women to ask men out first 2 Link to post Share on other sites
StellaGrace Posted August 14, 2015 Share Posted August 14, 2015 I live in the States. My boss asked out her dentist. Ethical or not, he said yes. They're now married. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Veb Posted August 14, 2015 Share Posted August 14, 2015 Really hope you have a great time on your vacation! Update: after he started to talk more about his personal life and seemed much more relaxed, warm and open when interacting with me during the consult, i decided to be bold ( usually I wait for the man to ask me out!). Sent him a text to suggest he get his medical issues treated at my temporary residence, which is beautiful, serene beach front. Perfect for healing, relaxing... Since he is so busy I left him with the choice if he wanted to do that and told him to let me know by the end of the week. Gave him my available time next week. Will see him at my medical consult on Tue. He is going on a 5 week trip to exotic locations very soon, so we will see if he fits this in or not. Either way I feel good for being unusually bold, thanks to your suggestion! Thank you for inspiring me:) 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author regine_phalange Posted August 14, 2015 Author Share Posted August 14, 2015 I live in the States. My boss asked out her dentist. Ethical or not, he said yes. They're now married. :love: How lovely! Really hope you have a great time on your vacation! Update: after he started to talk more about his personal life and seemed much more relaxed, warm and open when interacting with me during the consult, i decided to be bold ( usually I wait for the man to ask me out!). Sent him a text to suggest he get his medical issues treated at my temporary residence, which is beautiful, serene beach front. Perfect for healing, relaxing... Since he is so busy I left him with the choice if he wanted to do that and told him to let me know by the end of the week. Gave him my available time next week. Will see him at my medical consult on Tue. He is going on a 5 week trip to exotic locations very soon, so we will see if he fits this in or not. Either way I feel good for being unusually bold, thanks to your suggestion! Thank you for inspiring me:) I'm having a good time, thank you! Great approach! Both discreet and direct. I'm really glad that you felt inspired by my post! Please keep updating :D Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts