Woman with male energy

[PogoStick]

No real questions here, just comment how you choose.

 

Went on a 1st date last night, very interesting woman. She's a really high match for me on OKC, like 95% which is rare in this conservative locale. She's a woman with lots of masculine qualities.

 

1. She is a PhD, math professor. Very intelligent, wide rang of topics. Very attractive quality to me.

 

2. Talked about how she can't stand whiny, needy guys. She doesn't like frequent communication, doesn't want daily texts or phone calls. Liked that I didn't contact her at all for a couple days after we made date plans.

 

3. Complained about guys wanting to go exclusive after 1 date. Took that to mean she's reluctant to give up other fk buddy(s).

 

4. Likes to ball bust, such as food and music preferences.

 

5. Was kino-ing me during the date. Very open body language after 30 minutes in.

 

6. Initiated leaving the bar to go for a walk. Kind of lead the walk, as in she would randomly turn and start heading a new direction. Maybe it was a general lack of social awareness.

 

7. Decides to stop and sit at a bench, think she was waiting for me to make a move. It was entertaining.

 

8. Talks dirty like a guy (in general, not that specific moment).

 

9. Asks me to walk her to her car. She outright asks "hug or a kiss"? So I hug her, tell her I'm Mormon and kissing isn't allowed (we're both confirmed Atheists). And then I kiss her, make plans for 2nd meet, kiss again. She says she liked it.

 

Conversation was great. Planned for 2 hours but stayed over 4. I could be a wild match for her, feeling she is very sexual. Not sure if she picked up on how high my sexuality is too, but i'll be cocaine to a woman like her.

 

Not sure if I want to compete with her in masculine energy, or just keep my normal disposition, or: In this rare case I'm tempted to be the prey and let her chase since that seems like her instinct. But no, my real instinct is to pull the hair on the back of her head and physically dominate her in the bedroom. Pretty sure she'd enjoy that.

[Gary S]

9. Asks me to walk her to her car. She outright asks "hug or a kiss"? So I hug her, tell her I'm Mormon and kissing isn't allowed (we're both confirmed Atheists). And then I kiss her, make plans for 2nd meet, kiss again. She says she liked it.

 

 

- On a side note, I love this!

 

In answer to your question, she's high maintenance. This could be part of the reason why she's single.

[HereNorThere]

Man, honestly, these kind of chicks are a major turn off for me. If I wanted to f dudes, I'd go to a bath house. Most of these types are usually just compensating for their low self-esteem, but there are some real testosterone driven chicks out there. If you dig it, that's cool, but it's a deal breaker for me. Just be careful and don't get emotionally involved because these chicks tend to be cold as ice, especially if you cross them.

 

Remember, these chicks f you, not the other way around.

[smackie9]

- On a side note, I love this!

 

In answer to your question, she's high maintenance. This could be part of the reason why she's single.

 

 

Ya she's clueless. I'm an assertive woman, there are better, more seductive, ways to interact with a man aggressively.

 

Sounds like she's ready to peg you, not have her hair pulled.

[Mrin]

I've been with women like this and it was a turn off for me. I prefer very confident, strong feminine women. But not living in the masculine.

 

Each to their own however. Everyone has their own ideal match energetically speaking.

[mike_89]

Well I guess she is just one of those women that love maths. Women that love maths in my experience are very weird/wonky, have a dark sense of humour and are very manly but to be honest, they are the most wonderful women out there for sexual relations. I guess she won't complain if you have other girls on the side, maybe she would even want to help you hit on other girls (I dated a math girl for half a year and she wanted to hear all my stories of the other girls I was dating and helped me nail her roommate).

Maybe (propably ) I am stereotyping way too much here but you might want to explore her personality. Sounds like to me you'd have a ton of fun with her even if you weren't dating her, but just having her as a friend. Ideal friends with benefits no?

[BlueIris]

Be yourself or she won’t respect you or find you interesting. Anything else is deceptive.

 

If you don't like it, as others have expressed, don't continue with her.

[kendahke]

sounds like a match made in heaven. Go for it.

[SammySammy]

Not sure if I want to compete with her in masculine energy, or just keep my normal disposition, or: In this rare case I'm tempted to be the prey and let her chase since that seems like her instinct. But no, my real instinct is to pull the hair on the back of her head and physically dominate her in the bedroom. Pretty sure she'd enjoy that.

 

She won't tell you this, but she expects you to lead and be dominant outside of the bedroom too.

 

That's the problem with dating these hyper-masculine women. Constantly having to prove you're more masculine than she is. Almost everything she did during the date was a test of your masculinity. If you don't respond to her tests correctly, she's going to get rid of you. As Gary S said, that's why she's single now.

 

You've got to decide if you want to constantly be on edge. Constantly having to prove your dick is bigger than hers.

 

If that's what you want, go ahead and date this woman. If not, chose a woman who hasn't spent her whole life trying to be the son her father really wanted.

[BlueIris]

She won't tell you this, but she expects you to lead and be dominant outside of the bedroom too.

 

That's the problem with dating these hyper-masculine women. Constantly having to prove you're more masculine than she is. Almost everything she did during the date was a test of your masculinity. If you don't respond to her tests correctly, she's going to get rid of you. As Gary S said, that's why she's single now.

 

You've got to decide if you want to constantly be on edge. Constantly having to prove your dick is bigger than hers.

If that's what you want, go ahead and date this woman. If not, chose a woman who hasn't spent her whole life trying to be the son her father really wanted.

 

It doesn't put everyone on edge. It's natural and positive to some people and that's probably the kind of person she's waiting or looking for.

[SammySammy]

It doesn't put everyone on edge. It's natural and positive to some people and that's probably the kind of person she's waiting or looking for.

 

True, but I was responding to what he said.

 

Not sure if I want to compete with her in masculine energy, or just keep my normal disposition

[rocketman122]

by your list Ill go one at a time and say my POV

 

1-yes intellect is important to me too.

 

2-I like daily contact. texts and flirting is something I like.

shell probably ride you with a strap on and ask you whos your daddy. disgusting females like this are a huge turn off.

thats enough...shes out..too masculine for me. big turn off.

 

3-...

[GypsyGirl966]

None of that sounds 'masculine' to me. Maybe stop artificially 'categorizing' interactions and just enjoy yourself?

[xcupid]

Might turn into a wrestling match in the bedroom unless you answer the skill testing math question correctly.

[elaine567]

disgusting females like this are a huge turn off.

.

 

Disgusting????

[HereNorThere]

I agree that what you've said actually comes across more as someone with low self-esteem as opposed to hyper masculine. She's trying to compensate by being "too cool" and it comes across as manly. I have feeling her ego is actually super fragile.

[PogoStick]

Midknight - yeah that's the thing. I think she might be exhausting to have a serious relationship with. I don't want to judge too much after just one date though. Maybe she was nervous or maybe she gets lit after only 2 drinks.

[BlueIris]

True, but I was responding to what he said.

 

Makes sense.

[GypsyGirl966]

we're both confirmed Atheists

 

An Atheist posting about Abraham-based religious gender roles? Is there any way you could get your date to post on here so we can get her perspective on what she thought of you?

[PogoStick]

I agree that what you've said actually comes across more as someone with low self-esteem as opposed to hyper masculine. She's trying to compensate by being "too cool" and it comes across as manly. I have feeling her ego is actually super fragile.

 

That's an interesting take I'll have to explore. She's a grown up nerd at heart (PhD in math, what else would she be?). Think she had a rough childhood as her dad died when she was just a year old. I'm betting that all fits into the equation somehow.

[GravityMan]

Seems like she's trying way too hard, perhaps to compensate for something that's extremely embarrassing (or worse) to her. Like putting a nice-looking mask over something.

 

Tread carefully, OP.

 

Those types of women might make for good friends, but for most men they will not be their idea of a good girlfriend.

 

There are plenty of women out there who are energetic, outgoing, confident, funny, assertive, bold, intelligent, intellectual, can take care of themselves, etc...and simultaneously still effortlessly look, act and carry themselves in a FEMININE way. Their energy is unmistakably feminine. Those types of women are often highly desirable to men, and most secure men won't feel the slightest bit emasculated by them.

[dreamingoftigers]

Seems like she's trying way too hard, perhaps to compensate for something that's extremely embarrassing (or worse) to her. Like putting a nice-looking mask over something.

 

Tread carefully, OP.

 

Those types of women might make for good friends, but for most men they will not be their idea of a good girlfriend.

 

There are plenty of women out there who are energetic, outgoing, confident, funny, assertive, bold, intelligent, intellectual, can take care of themselves, etc...and simultaneously still effortlessly look, act and carry themselves in a FEMININE way. Their energy is unmistakably feminine. Those types of women are often highly desirable to men, and most secure men won't feel the slightest bit emasculated by them.

Ugh. Some of the men that posted up in response sound just awful to me.

 

I am not a very "feminine" woman.

I don't project "feminine" energy.

I like sex. I have my own preferences amid I am not always the most "socially aware" person.

 

I have trouble relating to many "female" roles.

 

I am not into shoes. I'm not fussy about my hair, clothes, house. I bought my last purse at goodwill for $7. I will use it until the zipper breaks. Then I will get another one.

 

I am more comfortable at work than being a Mom. It's rough because society really guilts you about that.

 

I simply don't come by it naturally.

 

In fact I more naturally come by being "handy" with things. My father taught me to look outility for myself and to stand up to people. He also cooked, which was viewed as "feminine" My mother doesn't cook, almost at all. I love to cook.

 

I also love who I am and what I have to offer a partner.

I spent a lot of time looking for a highly-sexual partner that appreciated my qualities and didn't expect me to be "done-up with manicured nails."

 

Am I trying to be a man? Am I trying to out-man a man? Am I white-knuckling, fighting against my inner urge to shoe-shop?

 

No to all of the above.

 

I also won three math scholarships, one physics and two chemistry. (And one English).

 

My point is this: I find it really offensive that what I naturally AM is automatically contextualized as being in competition with my men or men in general, or that somehow a

a woman with "more masculine" traits I am worth less then my purse-loving counterparts. Or that I am trying to project some "image." I am not "really confident."

 

I used to wear my Dad's flannel jackets on cold days in high school and they said I was a lesbian, for instance.

 

I am annoyed by the constant societal guilt-trip that comes along with being my gender.

 

I am my own person, with my own priorities and I like myself.

If you don't like me, fine but that doesn't mean it's because I am deficient as a woman. Quite possibly my farming ancestors prized strong women like me. Just because it's not fashionable with the internet-porn generation doesn't mean I lack in values. Maybe it means the men in this generation are too narrow-minded.

 

Unlike Pogo-stick who sees a sexy, smart woman who knows what she wants, accomplishes things, and would like to date him........

 

Sadly this intimidates other men on this thread who wants something easier. Perhaps they see her as challenging because should overlap some of what they feel they have to offer.

 

You know guys, more than one person can be smart and accomplished in a relationship.it doesn't mean you have to take it up the butt because a girl might be better at math.

 

 

lastly: I'm also Mormon. Kissing is allowed, where do you think all of those kids come from. LOL

[Phoe]

None of this sounds "masculine" to me.

 

She sounds confident, lively, and uninhibited is all.

[HereNorThere]

 

lastly: I'm also Mormon. Kissing is allowed, where do you think all of those kids come from. LOL

 

Yup, just remember to leave enough room for Jesus, Joseph Smith, the gold plates and your magic underwear.

[hotpotato]

Lol much of this could be said about me. I can be very blunt sexually. Im not realky a girly girl, i only dress like one. Maybe sge would be happier dating a quarterback, or something like that, someone who is obviously the dude.

 

What is kino ing?