Love/Pedestal to Complete Crash and Burn -Final Story

[writergal]

Am I sure she stole the phone?? I saw it. She told me how she found it. I said she needed to open it up and find the owner. She said she's keeping it. Doesn't get any more clear than that.

 

Damn shoddy Swedish furniture!!

 

That'll teach you to buy IKEA!

[lollipopspot]

She said she's keeping it.

 

Is she very advanced at stealing phones? I don't even know how average person steals an iPhone, with passcode, apple ID, Cloud, Find iPhone...

[loveweary11]

Is she very advanced at stealing phones? I don't even know how average person steals an iPhone, with passcode, apple ID, Cloud, Find iPhone...

 

No idea. I'm an android man myself.

 

In any case, you can certainly sell an iPhone you keep after finding. That's her plan.

 

It's all about the $$$

[lollipopspot]

In any case, you can certainly sell an iPhone you keep after finding. That's her plan.

 

Well I think it would have to be to known criminals - because I don't know that it's that it's that easy to scrub an iPhone so that it can't easily be traced back to its owner.

[loveweary11]

Well I think it would have to be to known criminals - because I don't know that it's that it's that easy to scrub an iPhone so that it can't easily be traced back to its owner.

 

Um.., I'm in new york city.

 

Let me borrow your IPhone for 15 minutes and see if I can find a buyer.

 

You are missing the point.

 

The point is her utter lack of compassion for a fellow human being. That's why I'm done with her. That is disgusting.

 

You don't steal someone's phone, wallet, etc. You return it.

[sandylee1]

The drugs would by far be my biggest issue. Then the phone is almost up there as well. I could never find a phone and keep it or sell it.

 

It's clear from your posts that you want a woman with a perfect body, that's your prerogative of course, but that can be pressuring for a woman. I have a friend whose BF told her if she goes over xx pounds in weight he'd be done. The guy is obsessed with fitness and he's turned my friend into someone afraid to eat and she isn't overweight. I might add that he isn't all that himself.

 

BTW - I understand how you never knew all that stuff till you lived together. People can hide their true self, so it's a good thing you found out.

[loveweary11]

 

It's clear from your posts that you want a woman with a perfect body,

 

Yes, it's a weakness of mine.

 

I've pretty much always had just that, so it's kind of hard to go back.

 

I don't get turned on sexually by out of shape women. I'm used to ones that are in shape. I also hold myself to strict fitness levels.

 

I was able to overlook this girl's new gut, but it baffles me as to how one can develop a gut and do nothing about it.

 

When i eat too much ice cream for a couple weeks and see any evidence of a gut forming, I immediately head it off before it becomes a big problem.

 

I work out every other day. I take stairs. I walk huge distances. I eat right.

 

It's not easy to share a day with someone who isn't as fit either.

 

There were all sorts of fun things to do in ny last weekend and she just couldn't keep up with me physically...and I'm way, WAY older than her!

 

I said I was getting antsy because I didn't get enough exercise. She said, "wasn't dancing enough?" I'm like, " not even close!" ha ha ha

Edited August 10, 2015 by loveweary11

[Gloria25]

Yes, it's a weakness of mine.

 

I've pretty much always had just that, so it's kind of hard to go back.

 

I don't get turned on sexually by out of shape women. I'm used to ones that are in shape. I also hold myself to strict fitness levels.

 

I was able to overlook this girl's new gut, but it baffles me as to how one can develop a gut and do nothing about it.

 

When i eat too much ice cream for a couple weeks and see any evidence of a gut forming, I immediately head it off before it becomes a big problem.

 

I work out every other day. I take stairs. I walk huge distances. I eat right.

 

It's not easy to share a day with someone who isn't as fit either.

 

There were all sorts of fun things to do in ny last weekend and she just couldn't keep up with me physically...and I'm way, WAY older than her!

 

I said I was getting antsy because I didn't get enough exercise. She said, "wasn't dancing enough?" I'm like, " not even close!" ha ha ha

 

Uh, there "are" slim and/or fit women who don't resort to cocaine to maintain their figure...

 

Maybe you oughta change your social circles...cuz, seems like it affects who you meet and/or consider "quality" people. Maybe join a hiking group? You can meet fit women who are into healthy habits and/or are actually "living" it instead of blabbing about it and snorting cocaine (aka "party girls").

 

Lol...

 

Reminds me of a few times that guys who met me in the club flat out asked me 'what is a quality chick like yourself doing here...you have so much going on for you'? I mean, I was so ignorant about what goes down in clubbing (i.e. drug use). I just go there to dance. Like when I've heard that X club was shut down and was told it was cuz of drugs I was like "oh, really"

Edited August 10, 2015 by Gloria25

[loveweary11]

Uh, there "are" slim and/or fit women who don't resort to cocaine to maintain their figure...

 

Maybe you oughta change your social circles...cuz, seems like it affects who you meet and/or consider "quality" people. Maybe join a hiking group? You can meet fit women who are into healthy habits and/or are actually "living" it instead of blabbing about it and snorting cocaine (aka "party girls").

 

Lol...

 

 

This confuses me.

 

Hiking groups seem to be filled with 50+ yo heavy women.

 

Clubs are filled with lots of great looking ones.

 

I don't know many cokeheads. Just 3 now.

 

Certainly, I'm not doing this stuff the right way, but I do also see that the girls who are better looking are not in meet up groups.

 

They are out having fun.

[Heatherknows]

You don't steal someone's phone, wallet, etc. You return it.

 

Correct. She sounds like she has a lot of bad qualities. Best to move forward and put this relationship in the past.

[Gloria25]

Yep, a person's character shows when no one is looking...

 

I found a wallet and celphone in a shopping cart on two different occasions when leaving a Walmart. I immediately took it in to turn into Customer Service w/o even looking into them.

[sandylee1]

Yes, it's a weakness of mine.

 

I've pretty much always had just that, so it's kind of hard to go back.

 

I also hold myself to strict fitness levels.

 

 

There were all sorts of fun things to do in ny last weekend and she just couldn't keep up with me physically...and I'm way, WAY older than her!

 

 

I think the gym would be a good place for you to meet a woman then. You'd be able to see the ones who come every day and have a great body and are as into fitness as yourself.

[Clarence_Boddicker]

Well I think it would have to be to known criminals - because I don't know that it's that it's that easy to scrub an iPhone so that it can't easily be traced back to its owner.

 

Last I heard, bad ESNs are not an issue in Ukraine.

[loveweary11]

I think the gym would be a good place for you to meet a woman then. You'd be able to see the ones who come every day and have a great body and are as into fitness as yourself.

 

Agreed.

 

Except I don't want to be "that guy" who hits on women at the gym.

[sandylee1]

Agreed.

 

Except I don't want to be "that guy" who hits on women at the gym.

 

I get ya

I'm sure you have the charm to do it in a classy way. I've had guys strike up conversation with me at the gym and I tend to think they're just being friendly. Of course because I'm married, I just reply in a friendly way and get on with what I'm doing.

 

I'm sure some girls are on the lookout there as well.

[TaraMaiden2]

What kills me most is all this spirituality, Karma, fascination with Sanskrit, Buddhism...and she's stealing things from other people.

 

I mean what the heck is that?!?!

 

That's the worst kind of hypocrisy there is.

I will be the first to say I am no angel; I screw up often, and probably will continue to do so.

But I sincerely don't prescribe to Buddhism/Spirituality/Kamma like some kind of status symbol/fashion accessory, which seems to be an occasional thing... And I would say it is with her.

 

It's all down to the Actions speaking louder again, isn't it?

 

So... room on your boat for a small crew-member now... ?

[Got it]

What is interesting is her physical attributes and issues came first in your synopsis than, what most would consider to be far more concerning, character flaws. That, I think, is worth deepdiving for you. Why the shallowness of external features weights so heavy especially in regards to accountability, direction, passion, etc.

 

I am glad that you have cut her off, she is a leach and isn't worth your time. Glad you found out now!

 

But maybe work on opening your perimeters a bit. I am not saying you need to date someone that is overweight, but may not have complete physical perfection but are of stellar personality and character. Maybe be a good partner for you.

[jen1447]

Well I think it would have to be to known criminals - because I don't know that it's that it's that easy to scrub an iPhone so that it can't easily be traced back to its owner.

 

Any large-ish metropolitan area's black market will turn around a supposedly 'secure' device in about two seconds. Some of the most innovative ppl in the world are criminals.

[jen1447]

(meant to add this above)

 

LW, I swear if I hear any "got back together" stories about yoga lady at this point I'm gonna beat your ass.

[craw]

Join a Crossfit gym. You will meet the type of girl you're looking for.

[Haydn]

Quite a few bars in Fulham you`d like....

[serial muse]

What is interesting is her physical attributes and issues came first in your synopsis than, what most would consider to be far more concerning, character flaws. That, I think, is worth deepdiving for you. Why the shallowness of external features weights so heavy especially in regards to accountability, direction, passion, etc.

 

I am glad that you have cut her off, she is a leach and isn't worth your time. Glad you found out now!

 

But maybe work on opening your perimeters a bit. I am not saying you need to date someone that is overweight, but may not have complete physical perfection but are of stellar personality and character. Maybe be a good partner for you.

 

I agree with this...I was quite struck by how uncompromising you are, OP, on physical attributes but clearly give a lot of leeway on personality. Seems like you're inclined to see the pretty packaging and fill in the interior you want to be there, rather than who she actually is. (I'm going off the idea you express from time to time that you actually want to change something about how you date/find partners. I honestly don't know whether you really do, because sometimes you seem open to it and others you seem to think there isn't anything to improve on. If the latter is the case, feel free to ignore, of course.)

 

No one's saying, of course, that you should date someone obese, so I hope we won't go down that red herring road. But I do think that you should ask yourself why the packaging comes first, and why you're inclined to put someone on a pedestal based on that, and ignore the red flags that I'm sure are there. I think it's really unlikely, given the amount of time you've spent with this woman in the past, that she never exhibited any of the personality traits you've discovered in the past few weeks - particularly given how extreme they seem to be. What about her even indicated that she had a good heart? Because she talked about being on an ashram? But what about her past actions, or her other relationships, indicated that she would be a good partner, a giving person, a kind one? (Her ass in yoga pants isn't a good answer.)

Edited August 10, 2015 by serial muse

[Timshel]

I may come off as antagonistic to you in asking this question LW. Antagonism is not my motivation.....it's only a detail that has bothered me throughout this thread.

 

You have said that since your reunion with her, she is penniless and financially dependent upon you. I would assume that explains her desperation in stealing a phone? Anyway, how/where did she get the money to buy coke?

[Rejected Rosebud]

 

I'm finally completely disengaged from her emotionally.

 

There were a few factors that just grossed me out.

 

Since I've been with her nearly 24/7,several things about her personality have come to light. I've already went on and on about her beauty, free spirited ways, etc. Now I'll share the negative that got me disinterested in her for good.

 

First, the one that actually didn't matter to me for the first time ever. She has a little gut that developed recently. I was thinking how for the first time, I was able to get over something like this and still find her very appealing. This was a personal first for me. I saw beyond the gut.

 

Ok I am sorry you have put yourself through this mess but it sounds very high school confidential to me, sorry - but I have to say that until you don't think that "seeing beyond the gut" is such a great personal accomplishment of yours, you won't be having any of what I call 'real" relationships anytime soon ...

[Rejected Rosebud]

In any case, you can certainly sell an iPhone you keep after finding. That's her plan.

 

It's all about the $$$

I agree that the phone stealing shows bad character but weren't you offering her untold amounts of money just for hanging around with you, if she is so money grubbing why wasn't this enough for her? And if "all about the $$$" is a turn off for you why are you always talking about paying for the company of girls??:confused: That is what you will be attracting of course!