How do you tell & what are the signals?

[Baz]

How many people here can explain in regards to girls giving signals, what are the signs that a girl likes you, without reading them wrong?

 

For example, say you know of a girl, you see her about for example but dont personally know her, what would you look for in regards to signals to show this girl likes you, how would she let you know (some examples maybe).

 

I find that in general girls are normally quite laid back, they dont tend to let you know too much, or they are more like take it or leave it kind of thing, they aren't really too bothered where as when i guy likes a girl, he wants to try get her.

 

So without making the mistake of being a fool of yourself, what signs/signals would you say girls give in regards to letting a guy know she likes him, or thinks he is alright?

 

thanks

[amerikajin]

I've responded to many a thread like these, in part just to remind myself of what I've already learned, and what I suppose I still have yet to learn.

 

How many people here can explain in regards to girls giving signals, what are the signs that a girl likes you, without reading them wrong?

 

Well, the truth is that you can never be 100 percent sure, even if she gives you the classic signals of interest. And the reason for that is there may be some hidden agendas cloaked underneath the flirtation.

 

Two things you need to remember here:

 

1. Natural attraction

 

2. Genuine interest

 

The two are NOT the same.

 

A girl may flirt with you because, to some extent, she has no choice. There's something about you that turns her on, so she flirts with you to see if you get turned on in return, and also to see just how genuinely interested in you she really is. Confusing, I know.

 

The first step in the game, though, is natural attraction. Now obviously, just as it is with us men, there are various levels of attraction. Some men turn on women without even trying; others are just relatively average, and others still, well, don't necessarily turn heads.

 

What is natural attraction? A woman's natural, and to some extent uncontrollable, desire to want to rip off your clothes.

 

Genuine interest is when a woman actually starts behaving in a way that would suggest that she wants you to help take it further.

 

Signs of natural interest: she smiles a lot, can't take her eyes off of you, plays with her hair when you talk to her, licks her lips, tilts her head, acts a little jittery like she wants to keep looking at you but occasionally flips her head away because she can't decide how to behave. That's raw attraction.

 

Genuine interest: is when the woman starts behaving consciously in a way that tries to direct you to her. She'll suggest a future activity together. She'll move in close to you, maybe even give you an "accidental" bump. She'll get in your way when you're walking somewhere. She has to do more than look, she has to feel you, and she starts sending you verbal cues that she wants you to pick up on, like "What are you doing this weekend?" "Maybe we could go _______ together sometime?"

 

But....

 

...keep in mind, this doesn't mean you've got her in your hand. A woman is scoping you out the entire time. She's like a very selective interviewer, doing a very intense screening and background check. She'll look for any negative signs along the way. Anything that raises a red flag along the way, and she'll put her guard up. And if the red flag is too big, or if there are too many red flags, you're out.

 

I find that in general girls are normally quite laid back, they dont tend to let you know too much, or they are more like take it or leave it kind of thing, they aren't really too bothered where as when i guy likes a girl, he wants to try get her.

 

Yeah, and it's one of the biggest mistakes we men have to unlearn. Men are NOT the ones running the show here, despite all of what we have seen and heard over the years about how men go out and "pick up" chicks. Actually, it's the chicks who pick us up. They're the ones who decide whether or not it continues. As a guy, you have to convince her that you're not a threat, and that at the same time, you're someone she wants. The best thing to do is not to be too aggressive, to be relaxed and calm and to behave in a way that suggests "Yeah, I'm interested in you, but you know...whatever happens, happens."

 

As for flirtation....

 

Natural attraction is difficult for a woman to control. Even women who are married will find themselves naturally attracted to certain men, and sometimes that attraction will scare the s*** out of them, just as it does for men who find themselves naturally attracted to certain women.

 

But natural attraction does not necessarily lead to genuine interest - and sometimes it's for the obvious reasons, as in the case of someone who's married with children.

 

What's confusing is when you get someone who has natural attraction to you and then begins showing signs of genuine interest, but then later stops herself. There may be reasons for that. It could be that the woman just let herself get a little carried away. It could also be that she's insecure and wants to be sure that she could still pull a guy if she had to. It could be that she wants to get her man's attention. It could be that she just like watching men trip all over themselves when giving her attention. And further still, it could be a complete lack of awareness on the part of the woman as to what her behavior might be suggesting.

 

Know, though, that in the majority of cases, if you're seeing the signs of genuine interest, you're doing pretty well. The odds are in your favor. Go for it - unless you know there's a good reason not to (like if she's married).

[Baz]

So how do you see these signs & situations?

 

1. I was walking up the path, she was sat near her kitchen windowsill, with her back to me, she was talking to someone in the kitchen aswell, though as i was walking up the path, she turned round & was smiling & looking at me, she was looking for quite a while too as i was walking up & whoever she was talking to, was obviously still talking to her while she was looking at me.

 

2. A second occasion like this happened, however, i know she saw me further across the road, but as i got closer to her window walking up the path to get home, she stayed at the window, though leaned to the side this time & was reading a letter. (I think this may be tied in with the raw attraction you mentioned, though maybe i'm wrong (which is what I'm interested in hearing views for so i can help sum it up a little as I'm interested to know)

 

These are just two similar situations, though their has been a few things, i dont know her really to talk to, just that she is near by & was interested in hearing what people's signs were.

 

Another occasion, i was in a bar & she was there too, she was walking past me & she slipped (purposly or not i dont know) & as i was sat at the side, she grabbed my top (she kept hold of it for a while (or should i say more than i think was needed))

 

How do you sum this up & what are your views on these occasions?, bear in mind i don't even really know this girl, she has just moved in near by, however i do think she is quite attractive & am intereseted in her myself.

[Baz]

i wanted to bum this for amerikajin & anyone else who may have an interesting response also.

 

thank you

[amerikajin]

Baz,

 

Sorry I didn't respond earlier.

 

Ya know, she might be interested, but there's one major problem here: you never really initiated anything to find out just how interested she might be. There are different levels of interest, and although a woman may like the way you look from across the room, nothing ever happens unless you start talking to her. Until you do, you're just some dude across the room. Maybe a very attractive dude, but still just another dude. Got it...dude?

[alphamale]

well BAZ.....have u ever heard the saying "if u have to ask, u cannot afford it"? well that applies in this situation.

[Baz]

Thanks Alpha & Ameirikajin, I've not heard that saying Alpha & not too sure what it means mate

 

Thank you to you both for kindly adding your advice & of course views, i appreciate it

[amerikajin]

No worries, mate.