greenhorn Posted May 11, 2005 Share Posted May 11, 2005 Originally posted by dgiirl hehe thanks I feel a little mean at taking pleasure in such a thing, but hey I deserve a break Why mean ?? Did he feel mean in dumping you? Do you have to carry alone the burden of ethical behaviour? Do unto them the same as they did to you - was in someone's signature, can't remember the name though. Link to post Share on other sites
dgiirl Posted May 11, 2005 Share Posted May 11, 2005 Yeah he was a mean arrogant a** for dumping me But I still dont like to take full pleasure when people go through difficult times. Even when it's rightly deserved. I'm happy this happened to him. I just dont like me feeling happy that it happened. I donno if that makes sense Like i dont want to get too carried away at one's misery Link to post Share on other sites
greenhorn Posted May 11, 2005 Share Posted May 11, 2005 Ha ha, you are so sweet, Ok celebrate this, go out and have dinner and this time *wink* at the cute guy eating dinner alone. P.S - Tell me which restaurant you are going Link to post Share on other sites
dgiirl Posted May 11, 2005 Share Posted May 11, 2005 Lol... I did that a few weeks ago. I was with friends, but kept trying to smile at this really cute guy eating alone. But he was so absorbed in his food and didnt notice. So then I decided to go to the washroom, since it was in his direction I caught his attention then, and it made me feel good But he ate so fast before hand that he left shortly after *sigh* Oh well, there's plenty of time. Now i'm just randomly smiling at strangers at appreciating them smiling back at me Link to post Share on other sites
Author ConfusedInOC Posted May 11, 2005 Author Share Posted May 11, 2005 Originally posted by dgiirl Lol... I did that a few weeks ago. I was with friends, but kept trying to smile at this really cute guy eating alone. But he was so absorbed in his food and didnt notice. So then I decided to go to the washroom, since it was in his direction I caught his attention then, and it made me feel good But he ate so fast before hand that he left shortly after *sigh* Oh well, there's plenty of time. Now i'm just randomly smiling at strangers at appreciating them smiling back at me That's a very good point. People who are down in the dumps over a lost love tend to not smile. Nobody wants to be around someone who's having their own pity party. It's not attractive at all. So if you're smiling, having a good time, etc then you force yourself into feeling better and people will want to hang out with you. I wish I was astute enough to recognize which women are smiling at me because they are interested and which are doing it just to be polite. Link to post Share on other sites
outdated Posted May 11, 2005 Share Posted May 11, 2005 [i wish I was astute enough to recognize which women are smiling at me because they are interested and which are doing it just to be polite. Dont we all!!! Link to post Share on other sites
dgiirl Posted May 11, 2005 Share Posted May 11, 2005 Dont we all!!! Me too... I have no clue when I guy smiles at me if it's friendly or not. I only know with the wierdo's. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ConfusedInOC Posted May 11, 2005 Author Share Posted May 11, 2005 Originally posted by dgiirl Me too... I have no clue when I guy smiles at me if it's friendly or not. I only know with the wierdo's. Here's what I am going to do. If a girl smiles at me that I like, I'm just going to take it as an open invitation to say hello. If she doesn't respond, then I know it was just her being friendly. The ones who do respond, well DUH, Poindexter!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
SadAndLonely Posted May 11, 2005 Share Posted May 11, 2005 Originally posted by ConfusedInOC The ones who do respond, well DUH, Poindexter!!!! Hey, I think you're a cutie! The fun thing about LS is that it's the same stupid cliques as in HS. Some people give absolutely terrible advice, and just because a few people kiss their ass they keep doing it. Other people give the best advice they can, and get ignored. For example, I will NEVER be a part of any clique here. People just tend to ignore my posts unless they piss them off. However, like in high school, I know that it doesn't matter. Oh noooo! Random idiots whom I don't even know don't like my posts!! Your ex is an idiot. And if you talk to her again, tell her that a hottie is after you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ConfusedInOC Posted May 11, 2005 Author Share Posted May 11, 2005 Originally posted by SadAndLonely Hey, I think you're a cutie! The fun thing about LS is that it's the same stupid cliques as in HS. Some people give absolutely terrible advice, and just because a few people kiss their ass they keep doing it. Other people give the best advice they can, and get ignored. For example, I will NEVER be a part of any clique here. People just tend to ignore my posts unless they piss them off. However, like in high school, I know that it doesn't matter. Oh noooo! Random idiots whom I don't even know don't like my posts!! Your ex is an idiot. And if you talk to her again, tell her that a hottie is after you. Aww, thanks. She is a lot like me though as neither of us are shallow. Looks mean a lot less than the person as a whole. I could be drop dead gorgeous and it wouldn't matter to her. It's who I am that matters. Though I admit the ex is far from perfect, she has some great internal qualities that completely override her looks. Too many people focus on improving their looks from the outside. That's putting a band-aid on a huge gash. We should focus our efforts on improving our "internal looks." Being a beautiful person on the inside will always do more for you than any change to your appearance. Link to post Share on other sites
XNemesisX Posted May 12, 2005 Share Posted May 12, 2005 The fun thing about LS is that it's the same stupid cliques as in HS. Some people give absolutely terrible advice, and just because a few people kiss their ass they keep doing it. Other people give the best advice they can, and get ignored. Who are you talking about? I haven't really noticed this...but sometimes I am not so observant to things like that. I guess you can't really say any names though Link to post Share on other sites
No Foolin Posted May 12, 2005 Share Posted May 12, 2005 Why you should NEVER break NC Thats easy....... Unless you like the emotional equiv of being hit in the back of the thighs with a red plastic bat, that leaves you rolling around in pain in the back yard; you really don't want to know what an ex has to say. I have never heard of anyone walking away with a warm feeling after speaking with an ex; unless the warm feeling is walking off a vicious verbal flame. Just like bungie jumping at one of those traveling carnivals, jawing with an ex is a bad idea. I would rather suck tinsel out of a cats a*s then revive the chaos and heartache of a old ex. If one ever gets it into their head that a simple innocent phone call/e-mail/PM to an ex is not going to set them back; I have your answer: WRONG..............Wrong answer. The mantra is this: WHAT THEY HAVE TO SAY IS REALLY TO MUCH FOR YOU. No Foolin Link to post Share on other sites
XNemesisX Posted May 12, 2005 Share Posted May 12, 2005 The only time contacting an ex who broke your heart WON"T hurt you is when you talk to an ex you have 0 feelings for. I guess a good rule of thumb is never contact an ex you still hold a candle for, an ex you hate, or an ex that is with someone else. *Unless you are a glutton for punishment, and enjoy the gut wrenching information. Link to post Share on other sites
blue16 Posted May 12, 2005 Share Posted May 12, 2005 Seems like the thread has sidetracked a little bit, but I just wanted to get my thoughts in first. If you want a way to get revenge on her, don't ever go out of your way to talk to her/contact her again. Right now she probably enjoys the fact that you miss her, are contacting her...and at the same time are even being harsh (you told her you threw out all of the photos of you two.) She's probably saying "wow...I really mean a lot to this guy." when she has moved on and isn't thinking about you 10x less than you are thinking about her. Don't overcompensate by getting mad at her, telling her off etc, that only shows that she is getting to you. What WILL get to HER is if she realizes she doesn't have you wrapped around her finger, and she loses that attention she's used to having. And you don't do that by contacting her, and you also don't accomplish that by being hostile towards her. Just be indifferent, treat her like any you would any other acquiantence/friend. As long as you continue to care about what she says/does, she has that hold over you. You can say "I really don't care about what she does" till the cows come home, but the fact is you obviously like/love her still if you are posting about it on this forum. This is totally understandable, but you should also not try to deny you still care about what she does. Only way to speed up the healing process is to meet other girls, have fun with ur friends, and focus on other things. I hate it when ppl just say "stop thinking about her!" or "you have to not care about what the thinks" because those are just words which are easier said then done. The only way you will not care is if there are other things in your life which are more important (another girl, interest, hobbies perhaps) and you will not even think twice about her. I used to have the 'obsessing over an ex' problem, and I quickly realized once I met another girl (who was way hotter, and nicer) I thought "pffff why was I so worked up about her anyways" and finally truly get over her. Link to post Share on other sites
simon_uk Posted May 12, 2005 Share Posted May 12, 2005 COC Dont know if you have got your books back yet and I really dont know of how much value they are to you but I would just not bother about them. The day before my ex left me, she had me open an Ikea store account and purchase a bed for her. £300 or approx $600. Now when I spoke to her a week later she asked how much she owed me etc and I told her. We haven't really spoke since, it has been three weeks complete NC, the last time we did speak she blew up at me when basically I was reacting to a VM she sent me, playing a love song!!! Ridiculous. I have just had the statement through for the bed and it really pissed me off. What am I going to do? Contact her and remind her what she owes me? No!!! am I **** I am going to pay the bill and never contact her again because like somebody said earlier, the cost of contacting her will be far greater tahn the cost of the bed! What she did is wrong, I agree but she had helped me out in the past, I am just looking at it as maybe it is what I owe her. Could be wrong but it saves me the heartache of contacting her. PS COC please PM me your MSN addy. Link to post Share on other sites
whitewhale Posted May 12, 2005 Share Posted May 12, 2005 Originally posted by ConfusedInOC Too many people focus on improving their looks from the outside. That's putting a band-aid on a huge gash. We should focus our efforts on improving our "internal looks." Being a beautiful person on the inside will always do more for you than any change to your appearance. I couldn't agree more. And it reminds me what my ex used to say a number of times and I was just trying to ignore it - he basically thought looks are more important, and whenever talked about women, he talked in terms of objects. He even said that he can't understand why his cousin had been dating "such an ugly girl" as much as for 6 months. I said then, that she must be very nice, and interesting, and that he's simply in love. And my ex said - "well yes, basically, still... how can anyone want to show up with a scarecrow?" Man, was I blind. Will look for someone who will ignore my "good looks" to see what's inside from now on. Link to post Share on other sites
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