21 years on the sidelines

[myexperiences]

Rant

 

I'm so ****ing tired of my life. 21 years spent admiring from afar. Earlier in the summer I realized the facts. I will always be at best a 6. Pretty ****ing depressing if you ask me. It makes me want to hit someone, but no face comes to mind. I could yell at my parents for having me, but 3/4 ain't bad. This is forgetting the fact that I have average if not below average intelligence. It ****ing kills me. Good looking people are broken, have it easier, this is a fact. But here I am borderline ugly, never held a hand, kissed a girl, et ****ing cetera. All I want to do is eat their pussies out for like 47 hours straight but no. Im still hoping to find my 7, sometimes, when I want to be delusional. Not sure what I'm trying to accomplish with this post, maybe find some others in my boat? Sometimes I think I'd be just as well off dead, unfortunately I'm not depressed enough to kill myself.

[endlessabyss]

Rant

 

I'm so ****ing tired of my life. 21 years spent admiring from afar. Earlier in the summer I realized the facts. I will always be at best a 6. Pretty ****ing depressing if you ask me. It makes me want to hit someone, but no face comes to mind. I could yell at my parents for having me, but 3/4 ain't bad. This is forgetting the fact that I have average if not below average intelligence. It ****ing kills me. Good looking people are broken, have it easier, this is a fact. But here I am borderline ugly, never held a hand, kissed a girl, et ****ing cetera. All I want to do is eat their pussies out for like 47 hours straight but no. Im still hoping to find my 7, sometimes, when I want to be delusional. Not sure what I'm trying to accomplish with this post, maybe find some others in my boat? Sometimes I think I'd be just as well off dead, unfortunately I'm not depressed enough to kill myself.

 

 

The struggle is real, broski.

 

 

Can't say I haven't had sex in my life, and all that, but I have been single for four years, and I can confirm, it gets kind of hard after a while.

 

But, most of the people I am still in contact with, that are in relationships, are desperate to get out. They aren't happy, and lust for other women. Plus, the sex in the relationship has dried up for some.

 

 

Seems like a catch 22. I'd wager it's better to be with someone, even if it's miserable, just so you don't have to be alone, and have some sort of access to sex.

 

Sex is useless without a connection. The connection is what we desire; dat der mutual attraction; knowing that you're important to at least one person in this cold world.

 

 

I don't know what else to really say. Life can suck sometimes.

[d0nnivain]

Oh for heaven's sake. You are 21. You haven't been on the sidelines for 21 years. At worst it's been 5-6 because nobody starts dating until they are 14-16.

 

 

You are only 21 Your life is not over. It's just beginning.

 

 

Stop focusing on the sex. Nobody wants you to give her oral for 47 hours (2 days). After a while sex hurts. There is also sleep, eating, taking a shower etc. Balance is important.

 

 

You need to focus on companionship before sex. If you can't click mentally, you are not going to be given a chance physically. Life is not a porn film where the naked woman just shows up.

 

 

Take a step back & examine your life. What are your skill sets? How can you capitalize on them? What activities do you enjoy? When you feel better about yourself, it will be easier to attract love. Nobody wants to date somebody who feels sorry for himself who thinks he's worthless. Romance relationships are not fixer-up projects.

[myexperiences]

Oh for heaven's sake. You are 21. You haven't been on the sidelines for 21 years. At worst it's been 5-6 because nobody starts dating until they are 14-16.

 

 

You are only 21 Your life is not over. It's just beginning.

 

 

Stop focusing on the sex. Nobody wants you to give her oral for 47 hours (2 days). After a while sex hurts. There is also sleep, eating, taking a shower etc. Balance is important.

 

 

You need to focus on companionship before sex. If you can't click mentally, you are not going to be given a chance physically. Life is not a porn film where the naked woman just shows up.

 

 

Take a step back & examine your life. What are your skill sets? How can you capitalize on them? What activities do you enjoy? When you feel better about yourself, it will be easier to attract love. Nobody wants to date somebody who feels sorry for himself who thinks he's worthless. Romance relationships are not fixer-up projects.

 

Hows this. Highschool and college years wasted. Ill peak around 25 and after 30, i dont want to think about that. I apologize for wanting to have sex. I only said that because I find it kinda humorous but also because thats one of the things that turn me on . I'm bi, and I also love to suck dick. Its about my partner. And I'm not retarded I know that she wont wanna **** every 5 seconds. Porn and gay hookups could probably last me a lifetime. Really I just want to love and be loved, by a woman. Or idk, take one out somewhere nice, and then she can realize she doesnt like me and itll end after dinner. That would be nice. I would like anything from being in the same room with one all the way to having my child. Anything positive would be a godsend.

 

As far as that goes, I have no skills. Everything I've tried I have sucked at, including the things I love. And I'm notorious for ****ing things up. Im okay at making my friends laugh using humour most girls wouldnt like. I dont think Im worthless. I know that no one wants to date somebody who.. but Im not in the business of lying to myself. No woman has ever shown me reason to be confident. And I guess im not a very good actor. Also thinking about all of this makes me want to throw up.

[d0nnivain]

Wanting to be loved is something we all want. Wanting sex is also a basic human need. I'm not faulting you for that. I am suggesting you learn to crawl and walk before you set out to run a marathon.

 

 

Confidence won't come from a woman. It has to come from within.

 

 

Have you tried therapy or at least self help books? There's a free thinking exercise where you spend some quiet time listing all the things you are good at from the grand to the small, like I lie my shoes quickly.

 

 

I'll start your list from what you wrote:

 

 

1. Good sense of humor

2. Make people laugh

3. OK at making friends

4. Honest with myself

 

 

Now you finish the list. Think about it for at least an hour & just free write. Include the trivial. If you don't get to 50 ask your friends & family for your good qualities. After you have a list put it away for a week. Then take it out & select the top 10. Re-write them neatly & keep the list with you. Read it 1st thing in the morning & the last thing at night.

[myexperiences]

Wanting to be loved is something we all want. Wanting sex is also a basic human need. I'm not faulting you for that. I am suggesting you learn to crawl and walk before you set out to run a marathon.

 

 

Confidence won't come from a woman. It has to come from within.

 

 

Have you tried therapy or at least self help books? There's a free thinking exercise where you spend some quiet time listing all the things you are good at from the grand to the small, like I lie my shoes quickly.

 

 

I'll start your list from what you wrote:

 

 

1. Good sense of humor

2. Make people laugh

3. OK at making friends

4. Honest with myself

 

 

Now you finish the list. Think about it for at least an hour & just free write. Include the trivial. If you don't get to 50 ask your friends & family for your good qualities. After you have a list put it away for a week. Then take it out & select the top 10. Re-write them neatly & keep the list with you. Read it 1st thing in the morning & the last thing at night.

 

I really appreciate you trying to help. Idk how to explain this, but I dont think its going to work. Theres no way in hell I could get to 50 being honest, and friends and family dont make good judges. Especially family. Just looking at the 4 im not sure any of them are entirely true. And I dont know how me feeling better about myself (especially falsely) is going to make me look any better. And I still dont know where the **** to go, and what the **** to say. Please excuse the cursing, but thats how I feel. Thanks anyways, I might give it a try. I also want to say, I dont think I'm a good judge of myself. How am I supposed to know If what I think is true? Im biased in every which way

Edited August 16, 2015 by myexperiences

[loveweary11]

So... change how you look.

 

We all have plenty of flaws.

 

It's how you work with what you are given that results in your outward appearance.

 

And I don't know where Donnivain is coming from... if there were a woman who wanted to give me oral for 47 hours, I'd marry her in a heartbeat!

[myexperiences]

So... change how you look.

 

We all have plenty of flaws.

 

It's how you work with what you are given that results in your outward appearance.

 

And I don't know where Donnivain is coming from... if there were a woman who wanted to give me oral for 47 hours, I'd marry her in a heartbeat!

 

Imma dress better and get a good haircut, but cant fix my face until im rich. And even then theres not much I can or want to do.

[loveweary11]

Imma dress better and get a good haircut, but cant fix my face until im rich. And even then theres not much I can or want to do.

 

And commit to staying in shape...

 

My face could use a little remodeling too, but if everything else is right, your natural face will be fine.

[smackie9]

And commit to having a positive attitude.....you are being a debbie downer right now.....stop it. The ladies can sense that sh it....makes them run the other way.

[d0nnivain]

I really appreciate you trying to help. Idk how to explain this, but I dont think its going to work. Theres no way in hell I could get to 50 being honest, and friends and family dont make good judges. Especially family. Just looking at the 4 im not sure any of them are entirely true. And I dont know how me feeling better about myself (especially falsely) is going to make me look any better. And I still dont know where the **** to go, and what the **** to say. Please excuse the cursing, but thats how I feel. Thanks anyways, I might give it a try. I also want to say, I dont think I'm a good judge of myself. How am I supposed to know If what I think is true? Im biased in every which way

 

 

I got that list from things you said about yourself in your 2nd post.

 

 

You are right, it won't work if your attitude is that it won't work. Which is why I said you may want to look into professional help. Until you value yourself no one else will value you. Your negative attitude is your biggest obstacle right now.

[oldshirt]

Imma dress better and get a good haircut, but cant fix my face until im rich. And even then theres not much I can or want to do.

 

 

 

 

 

Unless your face is somehow deformed or disfigured from an injury or a birth defect, you don't need surgery on it.

 

 

A good hairstyle, a good well-fitting stylish wardrobe, clean white teeth and a fit, muscular body will go a loooooooooong ways.

 

 

there is good looking and then there is looking good. Looking good is something everyone can achieve.

 

 

Looking good and having good interpersonal and social skills is something that everyone can achieve and it is good enough to get a GF.

 

 

Brad Pitt would strike out just as bad as anyone else if he were to wallow in self-pity.

[casey.lives]

yeah.. that's awesome. [b]sideline in a game that you don't want to play - i totally get it. keep chilling!!![/b]

[CarrieT]

OP, how old are you?

[SycamoreCircle]

Well, you can form a sentence. That's more than some of the people that come on LS can do!

 

Get out of that numbering system for yourself and other people. It has no basis. 6's, 7's, 10's---nonsense.

 

Denis Lavant(French actor) is by most accounts an ugly man. Yet, to me, he's a million times more fascinating, daring, intelligent and charismatic than George Clooney or Brad Pitt or Matt Damon.

 

Part of youth is self-doubt, self-wallowing. It's your Ego raging. It's the obverse of arrogance. You'll get through this. It's only natural.

[craw]

As per usual I didn't really read this thread. My biggest advice to you is to TRAVEL.

 

Get up and go off somewhere far and strange. Get out of your comfort zone, learn a new way of life and change your perspective.

 

It will change you.

 

If I could turn back time that's all I would work for.

[The Poster]

I've mentioned this before and I will do it again because young people can get way too obsessed about these things.

 

I didn't kiss my first girl, hold my first hand, or have sex until a few days before my 23rd birthday. Sometimes it just takes longer for it to happen than with others.

 

Look, I know how frustrating it can be, but take a deep breath. Calm down. It'll all be ok. Just keep looking and don't get down on yourself. Keep your head up. All is takes is one girl. I know you probably don't want to hear it, but I've been there too. So have many, many others. You cannot force these kind of things, and I promise you, when it does happen, it'll be worth the wait.