Finding it hard to give my boyfriend another chance after his emotional affair

[Holly.rowe]

I have recently discovered my partners emotional affair that said to have lasted 2 months started off with a kiss and then she left to go home for summer, shes a coworker at the bar he works at, which his parents own. She will no longer be working there after summer because of this. But the problem with not being able to forgive is, I was 2 weeks away from having our second child who is now 4weeks old, when I found out and confronted him. He denied it all and said she was saved as a man's name on his phone because he didn't want to hurt me with their friendship. He promised to cut off all with her, the next day I found new accounts Snapchat, email etc with her on there, I asked her what was going on and found out theud been texting and kissed once, I kicked him out and then forgave him get again a few days later. I then put a spy on his phone to know for sure, the night I gave birth he got home and told her our great news and how much he'd been thinking of her and how beautiful she is, she told him she loved him. Now yet again he wants forgiveness.

[kendahke]

What are you going to do? Sounds to me like he's not of the frame of mind to set this girl adrift, so are you down with sharing him with this girl?

 

You may need to kick him out and move on with you and your baby's lives if he's not interested in being a family.

 

So, he wants forgiveness for what, exactly? Does he even know? He can't be trusted--he went and stayed in touch with her even after he told you he promised to cut her off. When it comes to having to put spying apps on someone's phone, your relationship is already dead and over--all that's left is the breaking up, sorry to say.

 

You both need to get clear on focusing on being parenting partners for this child. A relationship between you two may not be in either of your best interests, but getting along for the sake of your child is.

[angel.eyes]

Why does he need another chance...yet again...despite the continued lying, hiding, and cheating under his parents' (the kids' grandparents') watch? While you're giving birth to his child, he's off telling another woman how beautiful she is and how he's thinking of her? He's quite the prince!

 

Are you amenable to an open relationship? Because that's what you've had for at least two months...and that's what you'll have if you decide to continue with him. His interests lie elsewhere even after being caught. As you've discovered, when someone is determined to cheat, he'll make it happen no matter how much you monitor him.

 

You guys have two kids together. Was there no interest in getting married? How come?

[mgutierrez]

I don't believe you should take him back. I believe in second chances as he said he would lose all contact with her and ending it all that was considered the second chance. He continues to do it and even when you are laying in a hospital bed after giving birth to your son that's pathetic!! He wants her so much let him go. He's not worth it! People make mistakes and deserve second chances if they really love a person and want a life with them they do everything to gain the trust back let go of relationships that that SO wants and I say it from experience. But if it continues its not worth forgiving anymore. Did he know you had that app on his phone?