Dadubwa Posted May 11, 2005 Share Posted May 11, 2005 It's like this.......I'm gay and...my girlfriend (Katlynn) and I have just celebrated our 1 year and 2 month annivers. ...I love her so much...she's so perfect in EVERYWAY I swear...only these 2 problems... 1) I need someone in my life who knows where they're going...who can take care of me...who I can grow up with and count on...someone who's down to earth and is going to make the right choices with me as we get older and blah blah all that "grown up" stuff...I'm not saying Katlynn isn't going to do any of that...but that's just the thing.....I don't know what she has planned for the future...she's one of those people who really does things but not to hurt anyone...but she'll make a promise and forget about it in a week...not because she means to! but because that's just the way she is......the thing is she's 2 years older than me..and yet more immature than I am...I'm not saying I'm this completely clean cut kid...but she reminds me of an 11 year old sometimes...I don't know it's weird and the second one is... 2) The other night while I was talking online...my very very friend Rissa and I got to talking about being gay...and she confessed to me she was bisexual...it wasn't a huge shock because someone had told me 2 years ago that Rissa said she was bisexual...it was still pretty suprised though....well I don't know why...but I'm sort of attracted to Rissa...and it's horrible because her and I flirt ALL the time...and we both know it...it's like innocent flirting...but the point is...I find myself compareing Rissa and Katlynn and I know that's soooooo awful...it's just Rissa is so down to earth and she keeps her promises and she's very charming...i don't know...maybe it's a second grade crush??... I wouldn't dream of ever dumpping Katlynn because I CAN see us growing up and I CAN see us being together...but I'm worried that these feelings for Rissa will become stronger...if I don't do something about it..........WHAT SHOULD I DO!?...I'm only 16 and I have alot of life to live.....but I don't want to live it without Katlynn and I don't want to live without Rissa either...it's all very strange to me.....someone help me out! Link to post Share on other sites
New_Wife Posted May 11, 2005 Share Posted May 11, 2005 This may be the worst advice you'll ever get. Namely because I'm heterosexual, married and in my 30's, so I understand absolutely ZERO of what you're going through. But I do understand that at 16, you're not who you are going to be fully formed yet. In a lot of ways you are, but the things that seem really trivial to you right now will grow to be monumental as you get older. I can't predict which things those will be for you, but for me things like employability in a mate, ambition, how well they interact with the crowd I find myself most comfortable in, their level of home tidiness, monetary responsibility, everday dependability, and if they cap the toothpaste or not can grow from pet peeves to deal-breakers. Give yourself time to find these things out before you commit to life with someone. If you feel it's time to explore other options while maintaining a caring friendship with your current love-interest, perhaps that's what needs to happen just now. Good luck either way. I hope someone more qualified has a better answer for you. Link to post Share on other sites
Illusion24 Posted May 11, 2005 Share Posted May 11, 2005 You're gay...AND have a girlfriend??!! That's the problem...IMHO Link to post Share on other sites
Illusion24 Posted May 11, 2005 Share Posted May 11, 2005 Wait that may have come out wrong...let me be more specific. Theirs abosolutely nothing wrong with beign gay. But if you are why are with a woman?? Doesn't that frustrate you that you can't be your TRUE self. That's the problem I see, that you're not being true to yourself...! Link to post Share on other sites
New_Wife Posted May 11, 2005 Share Posted May 11, 2005 Ahem...I think the poster is female. Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted May 11, 2005 Share Posted May 11, 2005 Originally posted by NeverSayNever ??? Ummm. NSN, Dadub is a chick. I remember her, she posted before when I was first on here.... That said, D, you are still young. I know you prolly hear that a lot but it's true. The things I valued in life when I was 16 are not the same things I value at 25. I have changed a f*ck ton, to be honest.... Someone here told me - great advice, really, for those of us who are overly analytical types - sometimes you have to let go and live in the moment. If you are enjoying your relationship, let yourself enjoy it. HOwever, it really does sound like you need to talk to K and let her know about the things that are annoying you, b/c maybe she can work on that stuff. REgarding Rissa, I am bi and my very best female friend is a lesbian. We flirt all the time, it's no big deal. We hang out almost every day and her girlfriends have often been jealous but remember, you have a higher brain. You choose how to behave and you need to gauge whether or not it is appropriate. I mean, maybe you are just too young to be tied down? I didn't date until I was 19 precisely because of this....but anyways, I hope things work out for ya, hon. Link to post Share on other sites
Illusion24 Posted May 11, 2005 Share Posted May 11, 2005 Ummm. NSN, Dadub is a chick. I remember her, she posted before when I was first on here.... DUH!!! SAWY!! IT'S BEEN A LONG DAY... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Dadubwa Posted May 11, 2005 Author Share Posted May 11, 2005 Thank you sooooo much guys....I'm goanna work on talking to Katlynn about some stuff I really really do love her...it's just Rissa is there when I need someone the most....I guess that's what has really been on my mind....and for all you who say "you're only 16".....I fully believe in that...I have alot of growing to do...and I know it THANK YOU!! <3 <3 P.S. I REALLY REALLY REALLY should grow my hair out HAHAHA I'm so 100% done with getting called a man!! HAHA I LOVE MY VAGINA!!!!...that's it...I'm putting another picture up LMAO Link to post Share on other sites
relention Posted May 12, 2005 Share Posted May 12, 2005 someone that is there for you all the time can be a friend, make her your friend and not somethign more, all you gotta do is know the difference and as you said you LOVE your girlfriend, your just confused and to be honest its staring you in the face what you really want. You want your gf and the other girl could be a really good friend. Link to post Share on other sites
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