herto09 Posted August 19, 2015 Share Posted August 19, 2015 I'm 22 and shes 20. She went through my phone and found some very immature convos i was having with my friends about being or doing things with other women. I never did actually do anything with other women but I do accept that it was a mistake and very stupid of me for having such convos or even thoughts. I know I don't deserve her after that. She was nothing but good to me and I love her. I've tried all the things i shouldn't have done such as apologizing none stop, making excuses and begging, She said she hates me now and thinks i'm disgusting. We had 3 years of just random texting where we had a strong connection and I always dreamed of her being my gf and it happened she lost her virginity to me also. I'm not even thinking of moving on at all. I'll do anything it takes to get her back anything that will actually work. Can someone please help me out on what are some next steps I should take for that chance. I haven't been able to sleep or go without even crying ever since we broke up on monday . Link to post Share on other sites
Qboro90 Posted August 19, 2015 Share Posted August 19, 2015 Send her one last text "listen I'm 22 and those texts between my friends and I were incredibly immature and inappropriate to do on my part. I know it's a lame excuse but sometimes guys just talk about completely inappropriate **** just because individually we're smart but when together we're about as intelligent as a bag of bricks when it comes to realizing what things we should and shouldn't talk about. I know that no gf wants to think that their BF could say or want those things but I just hope that you've known me long enough to know that deep down that's not me. I hate that me doing that has upset you to the point that you wanted to break up but just know it's something I'll hate myself for forcing you into that decision and is a wake up call at the very least for me going forward. I'm here for you no matter what, let me know if there anything you ever need". Leave it at that, then go no contact. If you've already told her something like that then just don't contact her again. She's upset so you groveling and begging for forgiveness just makes you look weak and unattractive. If all you did was texting with your buddies things like "yea I'd do anything to f@!- that girl, she's ridiculous" and things to that degree then you might just be dealing with a punishment break and she'll give you another shot eventually if you just behave yourself and don't plead to a point where she loses respect for you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author herto09 Posted August 20, 2015 Author Share Posted August 20, 2015 I said very similar stuff just like that! She kinda gave me a chance by telling to man up to what I said as she thought I was denying it which was a misunderstanding. I did do some begging pretty much said alot of things to try to convince her but she would just call me a hypocrite and fake. She ignored my last couple of msgs last night and we haven't talked since. I also forgot to add that she deleted all our pics we had on her Instagram. I still have ours. I want to do the no contact thing but do I now just wait til she msgs me if she ever does or msg her in a long period of time? Link to post Share on other sites
Author herto09 Posted August 20, 2015 Author Share Posted August 20, 2015 Bump please help Link to post Share on other sites
AIJ Posted August 20, 2015 Share Posted August 20, 2015 Nothing you really can do. 1. Why was she looking through your phone? 2. Why wouldn't you delete such conversations? Honestly just leave her alone, move on with your life. If she comes back, great. If she doesn't, great. You'll meet someone else. Link to post Share on other sites
Author herto09 Posted August 20, 2015 Author Share Posted August 20, 2015 I was thinking of doing no for two weeks or more. Would leaving a a written card at her door be creepy or sending it by mail is better? I want to do this after NC for a while Link to post Share on other sites
AIJ Posted August 20, 2015 Share Posted August 20, 2015 I was thinking of doing no for two weeks or more. Would leaving a a written card at her door be creepy or sending it by mail is better? I want to do this after NC for a while Just don't bother. You can't make someone want something they don't want. Remove all traces of your ex everywhere. Link to post Share on other sites
Author herto09 Posted August 21, 2015 Author Share Posted August 21, 2015 Why are you being so negative :/ there's been break ups 100x worse then mine and people have gotten back together so I can't see why I don't have a good chance to do something and get her back :/ Link to post Share on other sites
No Limit Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 Why are you being so negative :/ there's been break ups 100x worse then mine and people have gotten back together so I can't see why I don't have a good chance to do something and get her back :/ But she isn't any of those other people, and she won't let others influence her decision. Cheating - it doesn't matter that you didn't cheat, she believes you did and that's enough - is a deal breaker for most women and I'm afraid for her as well. Next time don't give away your passwords. Link to post Share on other sites
Author herto09 Posted August 23, 2015 Author Share Posted August 23, 2015 (edited) She doesint believe I cheated, she's just disgusted of the things id said. She agreed to see me as I reminded her that our 1yr since our very first date was coming up and that i had something planned and that I want to make it up to her and show her Im going to change. She agreed that she will see me and this was yesterday. She ignored my regular msg today. Shes never flopped on her word before so hopefully I'll still be seeing her next weekend. Any other advice on how to deal with this? Edited August 23, 2015 by herto09 Link to post Share on other sites
Qboro90 Posted August 26, 2015 Share Posted August 26, 2015 She doesint believe I cheated, she's just disgusted of the things id said. She agreed to see me as I reminded her that our 1yr since our very first date was coming up and that i had something planned and that I want to make it up to her and show her Im going to change. She agreed that she will see me and this was yesterday. She ignored my regular msg today. Shes never flopped on her word before so hopefully I'll still be seeing her next weekend. Any other advice on how to deal with this? We've given you advice and you haven't taken it. She completely bailed on you and your "one year since our first date apology/things will change date" so what more do you need her to tell you in order for you to stop contacting her? That was an awful idea by the way and comes off pretty pathetic. You think getting her a couple gifts or being really nice and loving during 1 dinner is gonna convince her of anything? The only thing that's going to make her even think about taking you back is time... And time apart from you..... Stop texting and reaching out to her. Absolutely do not leave a note where she lives. That's creepy and desperate. Don't contact this girl, you're just going to give her the impression that she has you in the palm of her hand. She can ignore you and bail on hanging out but the second she texts you "hey what's up" you'll reply immediately and apologize and ask to hang out. Youre getting playedddddddd Link to post Share on other sites
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