trustxone Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 We are going to marriage counseling because my spouse actions have caused me to doubt. Our relationship and I no longer trust him. Many factors. It constituted chooses he made before and after the marriage. Such as cheating (before), fibbing and hiding. I found out after we got married. He decided to go against my wishes and his ex came back into his life. This happened months after I found out about the lying etc. We had a child and then he had serious health issues. So I stuck around and of course I still love him. However he never confessed anything that continue to make me trust him less. He gave out his contact info to his ex and agreed he wanted to be friends that hung out. DH broke his promises. He agreed to before we got married and again after his ex got back in touch. His ex tried to come between us and break up our marriage. They have NO Children together but my husband and I do. I feel that up until the past 2 years he did everything he could to help dissolve our marriage. DH was not forth coming with the whole private conversation he and his ex had. His ex knew about some of these issues of ours and I caught her in several lies. I do not understand why he would allow someone like that in our life. My husband defended her until he read nasty hate messages she had sent to one of my social media site. She has also spread false rumors among her family and online. She and her friend have been very rude to me and have said things like. I am surprise he got married all thought he would never after his ex. That his ex was his soul mate. His ex seemed to excused me from everything and not want me present. He has tried very hard in our marriage when it comes to letting me know where he is or if he is running late. Loving and affectionate, not online much, as well as much more transparent. He still says he is unable to confess anything else about his past because he claims due to his car accident his memories are fuzzy. But is willing to seek marriage counseling and do whatever he has to. To my knowledge he is no longer in touch with any of his ex's. Just seem like these are red flags and wonder if I should have just left earlier but that is water under the bridge. To sum up my issues. I am having trouble letting go of the issues but cause I do not think they are resolved. Nothing has happened past apologizing. When it comes to finding out why he did this things, etc. So they do not repeat. Can marriage survive these betrayals of trust? Guess I am about to find out. Link to post Share on other sites
No Limit Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 So far he's only lied to you, before, during and after the marriage. Why do you want to reconcile with a guy like that? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 So far he's only lied to you, before, during and after the marriage. Why do you want to reconcile with a guy like that? Exactly. This is a perfect example of why it is NEVER a good idea to forgive a man who cheats on you before you get married or when you are engaged, and once you find out the lengths of his infidelity, DO NOT then have any children with him. STOP blaming the ex, SHE made no promises to YOU, HE did and he broke them. Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 STOP blaming the ex, SHE made no promises to YOU, HE did and he broke them. I noticed this, too: It constituted chooses he made before and after the marriage. Such as cheating (before), fibbing and hiding. ~edit~ His ex knew about some of these issues of ours and I caught her in several lies. Fibbing? OP--your husband LIED to you. Why are you downgrading it to "fib"? Fibbing is what 3 yr olds do because they don't understand the concept of continuity. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts