GH3 Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 I am going away to college soon, I had a falling out with my parents, and I just told the guy I'm seeing that we can't be together because my parents have to much control right now. I can't help but feel a lot of loneliness, which makes me cry often and I have trouble sleeping. I'm trying to make things right with my parents, but not being around anyone that is close to me will be hard now. I feel like I need to be hugged every so often at least, however, I'm going to be alone in a dorm most of the time. I do have friends there, but of course, they're always busy with school themselves. I find that even occupying myself in work doesn't really distract me. How do you deal with bad feelings of loneliness when you have no choice but to be alone? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Smitten and Bitten Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 You're going away to college, just had a falling out with your parents and broke up with your boyfriend! Any one of those things by themselves is tough to deal with but you're dealing with all three. So, first make sure you understand that you're supposed to feel lonely right now. It sounds like you've already decided that your college life is going to be a lonely one. Why? Is it because your feelings of loneliness right now are coloring your expectations? Why do you expect to be alone in your dorm room most of the time? Do you not make friends easily? Something else? We all need to be hugged at least once in a while, but the tragic fact is that there are going to be points in our lives when there's no one there to hug us. That's when we have to rely on ourselves, and it's also when we become stronger people. So, yes you should be keeping busy but don't use work or whatever as a means of escape; Suppressed bad feelings have a way of coming back and really screwing with your head. I don't know why you had the falling out with your parents or broke up with your boyfriend but don't let that ruin your college experience. If those things aren't resolved before you go, don't dwell on them while you are there. Think about them, try to figure out the reasons behind them, but don't dwell on them. You should be at college making new friends, learning all you can and planning your future. Every college has counselors and support groups; If you're still having trouble coping while at college remember that there's always someone there you can talk to. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH3 Posted August 21, 2015 Author Share Posted August 21, 2015 You're going away to college, just had a falling out with your parents and broke up with your boyfriend! Any one of those things by themselves is tough to deal with but you're dealing with all three. So, first make sure you understand that you're supposed to feel lonely right now. It sounds like you've already decided that your college life is going to be a lonely one. Why? Is it because your feelings of loneliness right now are coloring your expectations? Why do you expect to be alone in your dorm room most of the time? Do you not make friends easily? Something else? We all need to be hugged at least once in a while, but the tragic fact is that there are going to be points in our lives when there's no one there to hug us. That's when we have to rely on ourselves, and it's also when we become stronger people. So, yes you should be keeping busy but don't use work or whatever as a means of escape; Suppressed bad feelings have a way of coming back and really screwing with your head. I don't know why you had the falling out with your parents or broke up with your boyfriend but don't let that ruin your college experience. If those things aren't resolved before you go, don't dwell on them while you are there. Think about them, try to figure out the reasons behind them, but don't dwell on them. You should be at college making new friends, learning all you can and planning your future. Every college has counselors and support groups; If you're still having trouble coping while at college remember that there's always someone there you can talk to. Im already in college, but I'm going away again is what I forgot to mention. I am extremely busy most of the time during school so making time to spend with others gets tough and I get worn down. I had a falling out with my parents because I was seeing a guy without telling them, we were being intimate, and that really disappointed my parents. I broke up with him because otherwise, my parents wouldn't forgive me. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 10 steps you can take which “consistently tend to make people's lives happier and more fulfilling”. Do things for others Connect with people Take care of your body Notice the world around you Keep learning new things Have goals to look forward to Find ways to bounce back from difficulties Take a positive approach Become comfortable with who you are Be part of something bigger that gives you purpose and meaning in life Its in your hands. Your life will be what you make it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Smitten and Bitten Posted August 21, 2015 Share Posted August 21, 2015 Im already in college, but I'm going away again is what I forgot to mention. I am extremely busy most of the time during school so making time to spend with others gets tough and I get worn down. I had a falling out with my parents because I was seeing a guy without telling them, we were being intimate, and that really disappointed my parents. I broke up with him because otherwise, my parents wouldn't forgive me. Oh OK. Since you've been in college I'm assuming you're 18; Why are your boyfriends and what you do with them any of your parents' business? People 18 and over have boyfriends and girlfriends and become intimate with them. What's to forgive? Link to post Share on other sites
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