simps0n Posted August 22, 2015 Share Posted August 22, 2015 Hi all, My bestfriend's girlfriend cheated on him a while ago. It was quite shocking for everyone as things between them looked pretty well on the side and he was about to propose to her. I thought they were a good couple, but once this happened, I (and basically everyone else) advised him to leave her, forget her and move on. But he decided to give her a second chance. I believe he did this because he just was weak back there. They were separated for just a couple of weeks and then started seeing each other again. The girl decided to change her lifestyle from outgoing and communicative person to more isolated and closed one in order to continue to be with him. Now, almost an year later, their relationship doesn't look good. My friend's girlfriend is regularly emailing/texting me about their fights and asking me to talk to him and encourage him about their relationship. She says he still can't forgive her and continues to live in constant suspicion. On the other side, he doesn't talk to me about her/them any more (male ego, I guess..) I am honestly not sure if I want to engage in this in any way. What would you do? Link to post Share on other sites
La.Primavera Posted August 22, 2015 Share Posted August 22, 2015 So she thinks he is more likely to trust her if she is having private chats with his best mate about their relationship? I think she is crossing a line, she should be asking her own friends for advice, not his. If I were you I would not get involved at all and if she does it again I would tell her it was inappropriate. Nothing good can come from it. Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted August 22, 2015 Share Posted August 22, 2015 YOU as a man cannot get involved here. Your bff doesn't want to talk about it, so what are you supposed to do here? Spending long periods of time with the gf "talking"/texting/emailing is going to put you under suspicion and she may even be getting fairly attached to and reliant on you also. If there are no kids involved, she needs to walk away. Cheating needs counselling (individual and couple) and years of it for a relationship to survive in any way that could be looked on as "normal". Some never get over their partner cheating on them, even after decades and stay in anger fuelled relationships year after year. As they are just bf/gf and not married I advise a split ASAP. As he won't even talk about it, and they are fighting and living under constant suspicion, they have no chance of resolving this by themselves. This will not be doing them any favours mentally either. Link to post Share on other sites
Author simps0n Posted August 22, 2015 Author Share Posted August 22, 2015 (edited) Thanks for replies. I also think both of them need to move on. They should've done this long time ago. IMO, the only positive aspect of their second attempt was not that they had any chance, but they just avoided immediate separation back then. Now that their feelings sort of faded away, it should be easier. Or at least that's how I see things from my perspective... Anyway, I am not going to involve any further. The guy is still my best friend and I will support him, but this sort of decisions should be personal. Cheers Edited August 22, 2015 by simps0n 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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