TouchedByViolet Posted August 24, 2015 Share Posted August 24, 2015 Nothing wrong with OP not wanting a longterm relationship with a girl he finds to be a hoe. All these posters attacking him and saying he is some controlling ignorant guy are projecting their own insecurities. Everyone should find someone they are compatible with. I remember in college over hearing a young girl say "I need to stop having unprotected sex with people I don't know". She was physically hot but when I heard that I knew she was not for me and lost all interest. Finding someone you share values with is not judgemental. It's just common sense. Find someone who accepts you. Don't try and change people. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author harkkam Posted August 24, 2015 Author Share Posted August 24, 2015 Nothing wrong with OP not wanting a longterm relationship with a girl he finds to be a hoe. All these posters attacking him and saying he is some controlling ignorant guy are projecting their own insecurities. Everyone should find someone they are compatible with. I remember in college over hearing a young girl say "I need to stop having unprotected sex with people I don't know". She was physically hot but when I heard that I knew she was not for me and lost all interest. Finding someone you share values with is not judgemental. It's just common sense. Find someone who accepts you. Don't try and change people. That's fine. But please don't come here conplaining in a few months that you're not getting any luck with women. Not a lot of women want a man who refuses to treat them as equal thinking it is "bowing down to their rants" Personally when a man speaks like you did here, I run away. Far. And change my number. Equal thinking means you listen to the woman and her view points and if you disagree you don't change your view point of it upsets her, because you have your own mind. I don't care what type of men you date or don't. Just saying most men are not going to date loose women sorry. Link to post Share on other sites
BlueIris Posted August 24, 2015 Share Posted August 24, 2015 ... I don't have to tell her how I feel, I'll be able to tell what kind of woman she is from her body language. Ah, if only we could tell just by looking at someone what kind of woman or man that person is. But we can't. So, speak up, tell people your views so that everyone chooses on the facts. You will eliminate many of the women you consider undesirable while also showing your honesty and integrity. You wouldn't want an undesirable woman to accidentally get involved with you because she made erroneous assumptions about your beliefs and you wouldn't want to use people by misleading them. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby Slippers Posted August 24, 2015 Share Posted August 24, 2015 Most people in the "modern" world participate in casual sex, but you can find the minority of people who don't. I'm 39 and have had less than a dozen sex partners, most of them long-term partners. Of course, I could have had sex with far more partners, but I find bonded sex to be much more enjoyable than casual. I've always had relationships with men who are also selective, preferring to have sex with women they love and care about instead of randoms. I also find it a major turn-off if a man has had a lot of indiscriminate sex. It's more difficult to find people who are more sexually selective, but we are out there. I've endured relatively long periods of abstinence because I'd rather wait for someone who's right than just anybody who will do. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
casey.lives Posted August 24, 2015 Share Posted August 24, 2015 .....dating a women who got used up by an ex lover??? Link to post Share on other sites
mrldii Posted August 24, 2015 Share Posted August 24, 2015 ...Just saying most men are not going to date loose women sorry. While I have not made it my personal mission to date "most men" or even the 'majority of men' on this planet, absolutely NONE of the men I have dated [which, according to you is quite a substantial number] have had a problem with dating this "loose" woman (by your definition and standards), so there may be a flaw in your thesis' premise. Jus' sayin'. In any event, we get it. You have put the female population on notice: empirically-speaking, YOU will not be dating any female whose number is too high for your personal comfort level. Duly noted. We will respond and adjust accordingly... ...or not. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Author harkkam Posted August 24, 2015 Author Share Posted August 24, 2015 OP, I am one of those women whom you've determined "sleeps around". If it makes you feel any better, as an authority on the matter when having any of my ONSs there was little - if any - "sleeping" involved. Also, for the record, "hoes" are implements used by those who are spreading seeds in a garden; a "ho" is the colloquial term for the type of woman involved in the other type of seed-spreading. If you're going to attempt to insult a [large] portion of 51% of the world's population by slapping labels on 'em, try to get use the *right* one, 'kay? Okay, let's debate about how I used a word and how it's spelled because that's a great way to argue. Just like if I criticize a thief for stealing, I don't stop criticizing him because I offend people like his/her kind. Just like when I see a loose woman I put her in the not marriage category. I.e. Slut and hoe. I don't respect what a thief does and call it out and I don't like what loose women do. Now all of this cuts both ways. There are manwhores as well and they are just as guilty and not any better and don't get a pass on sleeping with tons of women and then expecting a conservative women for marriage. But you keep telling yourself what you want Link to post Share on other sites
Author harkkam Posted August 24, 2015 Author Share Posted August 24, 2015 Ah, if only we could tell just by looking at someone what kind of woman or man that person is. But we can't. So, speak up, tell people your views so that everyone chooses on the facts. You will eliminate many of the women you consider undesirable while also showing your honesty and integrity. You wouldn't want an undesirable woman to accidentally get involved with you because she made erroneous assumptions about your beliefs and you wouldn't want to use people by misleading them. Don't worry I'll manage Link to post Share on other sites
mrldii Posted August 24, 2015 Share Posted August 24, 2015 ...But you keep telling yourself what you want Nahhhhh...I'll just keep living my life, doing what it is that I do, and being happy with it all... which is evidenced by how few threads I start - and posts I make - on an online discussion board involving relationships, complaining about the type of men I'm not interested in dating, anyway. Best of luck to you, OP... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
autumnnight Posted August 24, 2015 Share Posted August 24, 2015 Okay good for you, that's why I don't have ONS because I wouldn't want that from my partner and I can't expect the same either Lol I love how people start attacking your views whenever they differ from the way they live their own lives. Keep thinking feminism and women empowerment are free of any critisism, I'm sorry I will not bow down to women and their rants to change my views I always chuckle when some manchild calls me a feminist. I am probably the least like what you mean when you say feminist of just about anyone. I like traditional roles, I love tending to a man, and I even (shock of shocks) believe in that evil Bible/Ephesians concept called submission. I was a virgin when I married because I wanted to give myself to my husband first. Am I perfect? No. But feminist in the sense YOU mean. Thanks for the laugh. Now I need to go powder my nose. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Maleficent Posted August 24, 2015 Share Posted August 24, 2015 Equal thinking means you listen to the woman and her view points and if you disagree you don't change your view point of it upsets her, because you have your own mind. . Actually, that's not equality. That's just sticking to your opinion. Not that there is anything wrong with it. But just like you get to choose your partners based on your views of sexuality, so do women. And not a lot of women are going to like your 1940s view if relationships. That's just how it is. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Maleficent Posted August 24, 2015 Share Posted August 24, 2015 I always chuckle when some manchild calls me a feminist. I am probably the least like what you mean when you say feminist of just about anyone. I like traditional roles, I love tending to a man, and I even (shock of shocks) believe in that evil Bible/Ephesians concept called submission. I was a virgin when I married because I wanted to give myself to my husband first. Am I perfect? No. But feminist in the sense YOU mean. Thanks for the laugh. Now I need to go powder my nose. I find it especially funny when this happens because I *GASP* disagree with him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted August 24, 2015 Share Posted August 24, 2015 OP, I doubt anyone really cares what you choose to do or who you choose to date or marry, but your subjective and cludgy definitions and generalizations are a bit offputting. If I say the sky is green and the grass is blue, it's not an opinion, it's wrong. Likewise if I claim that all women hate guys with blond hair, there's no way I can possibly substantiate that. And yet you presume to speak for mankind on their desire for "hoes" as marriage material as well as define "hoe" or "loose" for everyone by your own subjective standards. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Justanaverageguy Posted August 24, 2015 Share Posted August 24, 2015 I love it when people categorize subjective human behaviors as either good or bad. Its purely a matter of opinion. The idea of men not liking "sluts" as they have been termed here basically comes from insecure men fearing their offspring not being their own. But we have kind of evolved past that being an issue haven't what with condoms and the pill. The only moral code I follow is live and let live. If your not hurting anyone else your alright with me. So if a girl loves sex, makes sure she is clean and hast numbers north of 100 or whatever .... more power too her. If she is married and her and her partner like to swing .... go for it. If she wants to sleep with other women awesome .... hopefully she lets me watch and join in . The debate about "right" and "wrong" is literally a waste of time because there is no correct answer. Just personal preference. When you are comfortable with your own position you don't normally feel the need to try and force others to change theirs. You like women who have had sex with between 5-10 men only. Thats kind of weidly specific yet random number .... but hey whatever floats your boat . 9 Link to post Share on other sites
wb1988 Posted August 24, 2015 Share Posted August 24, 2015 One girlfriend was 19 and had already been with over 10 men. That scared me initially, but she constantly complimented how compatible we were, never brought up the other guys, and knew how to stroke my ego (literally and figuratively). Some of it may have been lies to placate me, but that's fine. I felt very comfortable with her. One girlfriend was 21 and had been with 6 men. I felt like ******* around her because she was way too graphic about those other men. I know how they made her feel, what she liked with them, etc. That made me think of her as a whore. I had a very similar experience as well but I only made the comparison until I read your example, wow! Link to post Share on other sites
deadelvis Posted August 24, 2015 Share Posted August 24, 2015 To be completely honest... I thought I was liberal and open minded sexually. I've been with a pretty large number of women, and my GF has had around the same number. I didn't think it would be an issue at the start of our relationship, but over time it's become a problem. It's not the number, or even the details that creates conflict... it's the constant comparisons and examination of past behavior. So far she's been an amazing partner, but I am always paranoid because of her history of cheating on her previoous partner... and the comparisons suck. Like she mentioned having some crazy experiences in the past... yet now I'm lucky if I get sex a couple times a week. And forget about all the crazy stuff she did with her casual f-buddies. That stuff is all off limits for me. It's difficult to reconcile her past promiscuity with the relatively mundane sex life we currently share. If this relationship doesn't work out, I will probably take a woman's sexual history into greater consideration next time. Not saying it makes her a lesser partner, but I thought having such a wild sexual history would make her a more exciting lover... but the reality is just the opposite. It seems like she already got her wild sex in the past and now she wants a "provider"... while a less experienced woman would still want to explore her sexuality and not have such a "been there done that" attitude about sex. Overall it's a bit of a nightmare. All things considered... if their number is larger than their age... you should probably run, just like all the other guys before you. Link to post Share on other sites
Maleficent Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 To be completely honest... I thought I was liberal and open minded sexually. I've been with a pretty large number of women, and my GF has had around the same number. I didn't think it would be an issue at the start of our relationship, but over time it's become a problem. It's not the number, or even the details that creates conflict... it's the constant comparisons and examination of past behavior. So far she's been an amazing partner, but I am always paranoid because of her history of cheating on her previoous partner... and the comparisons suck. Like she mentioned having some crazy experiences in the past... yet now I'm lucky if I get sex a couple times a week. And forget about all the crazy stuff she did with her casual f-buddies. That stuff is all off limits for me. It's difficult to reconcile her past promiscuity with the relatively mundane sex life we currently share. If this relationship doesn't work out, I will probably take a woman's sexual history into greater consideration next time. Not saying it makes her a lesser partner, but I thought having such a wild sexual history would make her a more exciting lover... but the reality is just the opposite. It seems like she already got her wild sex in the past and now she wants a "provider"... while a less experienced woman would still want to explore her sexuality and not have such a "been there done that" attitude about sex. Overall it's a bit of a nightmare. All things considered... if their number is larger than their age... you should probably run, just like all the other guys before you. Gosh,it's one thing to have a colourfull past, it's another to wave it in your new partner's face as 'better'. Are you the one making those comparisons or is she the one 'comparing' you to past partners? Don't look for someone with 'less experience' thinking they will have more to explore. Look for someone who has that 'I want to explore my sexuality' attitude regardless of the experience. Have you talked to her about this? Did you ever think that maybe all her exploration led to the realization she was very vanilla after all? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
jay1983 Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 These threads remind me of the ones with the guys complaining about being short, paying for dates, being shy, don't make enough money. Women can bitch all they want, it's not gonna make any difference. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mrldii Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 ...Women can bitch all they want, it's not gonna make any difference. The OP of this thread is a male, NOT a woman. Apparently, useless bitching knows no genders. Link to post Share on other sites
jay1983 Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 He's not the one bitching. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author harkkam Posted August 25, 2015 Author Share Posted August 25, 2015 2 men did marry this "slut"...3 others wanted to marry this "slut", but I declined their proposals. That's enough proof for one lifetime to disprove your thesis' premise. So far, beginning on page 1 of this thread and moving through page 5, OP has called the type of women he doesn't like, (i.e., "feminists" who have had more sexual experience than he, personally, is comfortable with) "loose party girls" "cheap and easy", "used up hoe", and "slut and hoe". He is now leveling these labels at those women replying to his threads in disagreement to him. Can't wait to see what OP comes up with on page 6, all in the name of a good, healthy discussion about "Dating" on an online discussion board whose topic is "Relationships". Feel sorry of them Whatever I'll just stay away from women like that. Women who just spread their legs at the drop of a hat. Link to post Share on other sites
yxalitis Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 This thread both fascinates and disturbs me. Do people really still think like that? 4 Link to post Share on other sites
mrldii Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 Feel sorry of them Whatever I'll just stay away from women like that. Women who just spread their legs at the drop of a hat. We kinda got that, after 5 pages of simply finding more colorful ways to restate your OP, in which you indicated you'll have nothing to do with "women like that...who just spread their legs at the drop of a hat." Unless, of course, you're horny...then you'll know where to go, as you - yourself - stated: ...See as a man I love party women, because which guy doesn't like easy sex... ...Basically men want one night stands and women who give it to them are cheap and easy... ...But casual one night stands turn me off from a woman I want for an LTR For a fun night she is exactly the kind of woman i want 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Maleficent Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 Feel sorry of them Whatever I'll just stay away from women like that. Women who just spread their legs at the drop of a hat. You are assuming women 'spread their legs at the drop of a hat'? You are assuming that we agree to have sex with just anyone at any time regardless of whether we are attracted to the guy or not? Women have many many opportunities for having sex. Sorry Nice Guys TM that's just how it is. Men want to have a lot of sex with us. Women with a higher number of partner just take more opportunities than others. If I had slept with all the men that wanted to sleep with me in the 17 years I've been sexually active ( ) , I'd have at least 100 partners. instead I have roughly 20 (less than half of those were my boyfriends) Link to post Share on other sites
Maleficent Posted August 25, 2015 Share Posted August 25, 2015 This thread both fascinates and disturbs me. Do people really still think like that? Yup. Also, it's an anonymous forum. People say things on here they would probably never tell their friends. Link to post Share on other sites
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