Padfoot Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 (edited) Dear friends, I moved to States about 3 years ago. I was 23 and clueless. After 2 months of struggle with adaptation to the life in States, I met this woman. Like I said, I was clueless and I believe I didn't understand lots of things that she tried to tell me or warn me about herself. I just want to give you one little detail about, "how we started dating"; We met at a mutual friends place and started going out as friends. One night we were at the friends gathering and I didn't know my gf had crush on me and I started getting closer-not emotionally- with some other girl at the party, she saw me, she cried and gave me a hug then left the place. Next day she called me crying and we started seeing each other. After 2 months, I saw she was not the one I can rely on-she was calling every single plan off, most of the times without letting me know-. I broke up. 2 weeks later we went to Ikea together, she again cried and I lowered my guard we started dating again. There are so many mistakes I have done in this relationship, but there are some mistakes she has done are not acceptable I believe. -She would put people-mutual friends- on speaker phone while we are arguing, -She would correct me or direct me in every single situation, -Once she told me if I don't go on vacation with her, she was planning to go with her best friend-male-, -She told me(hundreds of time) I have saved her life-suicide- over and over while she had no friends, lost 3 jobs in a row. She would tell me every time she felt down " I can't survive this life without you but If you want to date younger girls I would understand" -She called me primitive minded, not Caucasian-which I'm and don't care about skin color at all-, -She would tell me that she needs her space when I want to talk about my feelings, -We were lived together over a year she told me to leave the place for a day or so, for 6 times and I left the place for good. Now I'm living on my own. She is 34 years old and I'm 26 now. I've never accepted any money or financial support from her. It's not a sugar mom thing-I didn't even know her age till the 2nd month. At the same time we shared very deep connection and love. After 6 months of break, she tried to become friends with me at least 10 times. One time she called me 6am in the morning crying. Asked me if she can spend the night with me, I accepted. After a while she called me again and told me that her new boyfriend broke up with her, and i hung up and blocked her but now we are back together. My question is do you think that there is still a chance that she can change her ways? Just clear the air, I'm a guy with dignity, decent income, high education. I'm also handsome. I'm just trying to tell you I'm not desperate for a relationship. I just don't want to lose my best friend, I want to save this relationship but it hurts. Thanks in advance for your time and response... Edited August 31, 2015 by Padfoot Link to post Share on other sites
pidgeon1010 Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 RUN and never look back. This relationship was done, even before it started. I don't think it will last. Talk about toxic! And she's 34 years old? Such immaturity! Link to post Share on other sites
mikeveli4g Posted September 1, 2015 Share Posted September 1, 2015 Pad I've got to roll with Pidgeon's comment on this but in a manner less harsh because it is tough losing a friendship but from what I've read you seem to be confident in knowing you'll be alright and you can get any woman you want. You don't want to ruin any new candidates over this girl who seems "toxic," and believe me it can happen. Women are good at reading a man who is confused/brokenhearted. Take some more time away from her homey she needs to grow up (sadly at 34.) I've been there man... trying to be friends with someone who dumped me with no closure, explanation and found the strength to leave her alone and when she called trying to be friends it was nothing but another disaster that could have been avoided had I just kept my mouth shut. 26 is a GOOD AGE to do some GOOD THINGS!!!! Go for it homey! Don't waste your time on people who aren't worth it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Padfoot Posted September 1, 2015 Author Share Posted September 1, 2015 RUN and never look back. This relationship was done, even before it started. I don't think it will last. Talk about toxic! And she's 34 years old? Such immaturity! Pad I've got to roll with Pidgeon's comment on this but in a manner less harsh because it is tough losing a friendship but from what I've read you seem to be confident in knowing you'll be alright and you can get any woman you want. You don't want to ruin any new candidates over this girl who seems "toxic," and believe me it can happen. Women are good at reading a man who is confused/brokenhearted. Take some more time away from her homey she needs to grow up (sadly at 34.) I've been there man... trying to be friends with someone who dumped me with no closure, explanation and found the strength to leave her alone and when she called trying to be friends it was nothing but another disaster that could have been avoided had I just kept my mouth shut. 26 is a GOOD AGE to do some GOOD THINGS!!!! Go for it homey! Don't waste your time on people who aren't worth it. Thank you for your answers, I can see things more clear now. Thanks again... Link to post Share on other sites
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