Girl rejected me 5 years ago, but messages me out of the blue after 5 years?

[MashedPotatoes]

Long story short, girl who rejected me 5 years ago messaged me out of the blue asking how I'm doing.

 

I've known this girl since we were little kids (our parents are good friends). We were never close however. I ran into her 5 years ago after having not seen her in over 15 or so years. I invited her to a party I was throwing and after reconnecting a bit we started hanging out on a regular basis. We went on these pseudo dates where I never explicitly made any kind of move. After months of hanging out, I finally summoned the courage to ask her out on a "date" to celebrate her birthday (date went horrible). A few days later, I spilled my guts, got politely shut down and I essentially ceased all contact with her. Now, after all these years, she decides to message me? I'm ecstatic, suspicious, and a little intrigued.

 

What y'all think?

[Zippy2000]

Hard to say as I dont know much about her but this is very similar to a girl I met on Match.

 

I dated her 4 years ago and went on one date. the date was oaky and she agreed to se me for a second but she flaked. To cut a long story short. After 4 years and after 3 failed relationships. Guess what?

 

I got a mesage of a friend of hers I never speak to and she asked me what I thought about "being a couple" with the girl I had a date with 4 years ago!

 

I stayed in contact with her so I know about her failed relationships.

 

My opinion? They always come back. I never went needy on her or made a scene. I became her friend and I accepted that. She was clear nothing would happen. It wasnt until her first relationship they boyfriend left her, and the last 2 guys she was with had cheated on her.

 

Its possible she remembered you and you dint have any bad feelings and drifted apart. She maybe trying to restart something where you guys had left.

 

Also with my experience. After 4 years. The girl I had dated saw me for who I was and she must have changed the way she thought of me.

 

This is why sometimes NO CONTACT works. If Im right. You didnt speak to her? Shes now come back on her own accord.

[PegNosePete]

She wants to be your friend.

 

Do you want to be her friend? Just her friend? Honestly?

[Redhead14]

Long story short, girl who rejected me 5 years ago messaged me out of the blue asking how I'm doing.

 

I've known this girl since we were little kids (our parents are good friends). We were never close however. I ran into her 5 years ago after having not seen her in over 15 or so years. I invited her to a party I was throwing and after reconnecting a bit we started hanging out on a regular basis. We went on these pseudo dates where I never explicitly made any kind of move. After months of hanging out, I finally summoned the courage to ask her out on a "date" to celebrate her birthday (date went horrible). A few days later, I spilled my guts, got politely shut down and I essentially ceased all contact with her. Now, after all these years, she decides to message me? I'm ecstatic, suspicious, and a little intrigued.

 

What y'all think?

 

This kind of thing usually happens when the "dumper" has not had very much success in dating since the "break up". They get to a point of saying to themselves "well, I'm in a dry spell dating-wise and options are limited, why not try the guy I passed on a few years ago. At least, I'll be able to get out of the house".

[angel.eyes]

Now, after all these years, she decides to message me? I'm ecstatic, suspicious, and a little intrigued.

 

What y'all think?

 

My crystal ball is cloudy, but options include:

• Let's try another date (the terrible memory of the last one has faded and been replaced with nostalgia.)
  
• Let's be friends (one can never have too many friends)
  
• You have some skill she needs at the moment. (After a friendly exchange, she'll cut to the chase and ask for the favor that requires that skill)
  
• She's coming back to town for a visit and is just reconnecting with everyone while she's there.
  

 

None of us knows. We can endlessly speculate. Why not respond and see where things go? It will become clear very quickly.

[Eternal Sunshine]

This kind of thing usually happens when the "dumper" has not had very much success in dating since the "break up". They get to a point of saying to themselves "well, I'm in a dry spell dating-wise and options are limited, why not try the guy I passed on a few years ago. At least, I'll be able to get out of the house".

 

This is why I would do it.

[Gary S]

This kind of thing usually happens when the "dumper" has not had very much success in dating since the "break up". They get to a point of saying to themselves "well, I'm in a dry spell dating-wise and options are limited, why not try the guy I passed on a few years ago. At least, I'll be able to get out of the house".

 

 

- Bingo. She does not have a viable love interest on her plate at the moment and is just checking out what's on the back-burner. Redhead is on a roll today!

 

It's not friends - friends talk to each other, but you have not heard from her for 5 years....that's not a friend.