Is living with an older sibling impossible?

[simplybrill]

Hey everyone!

 

I am in a bit of a pickle. I am the younger of two sisters, my sister is 4 years older than me. We can't seem to get along anymore, and it's always my fault lately. It just really sucks. Now it's like we're fighting every month, big ol' emotional knockout fights where we're both so tired of yelling and crying at the end, we just give up, and nothing get's solved. Well I think we both agree that we can't afford to move out on the other, and we're stuck until we can. I know I'm not perfect, but it's hard living with a very type-A, anal older sister who's all up in my life and business. Any advice?

[XNemesisX]

Just try to be as non-confrontational as possible. Did you get along ok before you moved in together? Living with someone can bring out the worst in people. You know what tehy say about best friends who become roommates? After they are roommates they hate eachother. This is true, happened to me and my old best friend who I shared an apt with for a year.

 

Just try to be patient with her, and as cordial as possible until you can move out. Don't antagonize her, and refuse to fight with her. I find this is the best way to act around type As...my mother is a definite Type A so now I just act bored when she wants to throw a temper tantrum and refuse to react to her.

[alphamale]

suck it up and agree to disagree. you have no other choice. try to act like mature adults like most of the rest of us.

 

basically, GROW UP!

[quankanne]

set up some ground rules so that the both of you know where you stand. I think that maybe because she's the "big sister," she's going to want to take care of you or baby you some.

 

I moved in with my sister a year after graduating from college and I had mixed feelings about that. I had to share a room with her kids while she slept with her boyfriend, I was her built-in babysitter and she tried to baby me even after I got married (husband was working overseas and I lived with her about three months after we'd married). On the other hand, the nights I did go out partying with friends (pre-marriage, of course!), I didn't have to answer to anyone where I was, so that was nice )

 

Still, I wish I had done what I'm advising, set up ground rules so that nothing or no one is taken for granted.

[Elmo]

When is the end of your lease agreement?

 

Sit down with her and be honest about the situation. It is clearly not great.

 

Clear the air and agree that at the end of the lease you/or she will move out or get a different roomate.

 

It's not the end of the world. Just not a good match room-mate wise.

 

If she wigs, tell her you love her but are going to find a different housing situation. Be calm and kind. She sounds like she has to control things. Let her control herself.... you should find a more mellow place to live.

 

You would be shocked at how nice a room-mate with your attitude would be to live with.

[XNemesisX]

I got treated like I was a baby by my old roommate and we weren't even related!

 

I don't know why that I seem to attract that though...literally all of my friends and family seem to act like they are taking care of me and I am unable to look after myself.

 

But anyway, back to the OP. Wonder where she is? I hope that one day my younger sister can feel like she can move in with me (if I'm still single and living alone I would love for her to live with me!) Although I am sure it would be hard not to be a mother figure to her (she's 9 years younger than me).

 

Anyway, don't take your sister(s) for granted and just try to be as mature (as Alpha said) and cool and collected as possible until different housing arrangements can be made.