L_and_P21 Posted May 13, 2005 Share Posted May 13, 2005 ok so here i am sitting in front of my computer thinking about how sick i am of being lonely. im 20 and have never had a gf, ive never been kissed, and have never really dated. not because i didnt want to but more like cause ive never really been given the chance. im not the most handsome guy but i consider myself about a 6 or 7. im not the most out going person but not shy more of a quiet person. so my question is why am i alone? i mean i have had girls like me but never really gone anywhere. whats my problem? if you need anymore info about me just ask and ill reply Link to post Share on other sites
suegail Posted May 13, 2005 Share Posted May 13, 2005 There are many people on here, my friend, (including myself) who have loved and lived to regret it. Just because one isn't alone doesn't imply that they are happy. My point is, you're young - - I'm sure your time will come, and when it does I hope you'll find the person who suits you well, someone you can be truly happy with, in which case you'll never be sorry for the wait. Link to post Share on other sites
XNemesisX Posted May 13, 2005 Share Posted May 13, 2005 20 is not that old at all, although maybe a bit unusual for a 20 year old to have never been kissed. Well...look at it this way. It can be much worse. One of my friends is 27 years old and has NEVER been kissed even. He's not even been on a real date before. You still have plenty of time. And just like the above poster stated, sometimes I envy people who haven't been in a relationship yet. I'm not much older than you, 22, and I have already had 2 serious relationships - in the last one I was engaged. I had my heart broken in a million pieces, and now I feel I will never be the same as I was before these relationships. The "innocence" so to speak is gone. The purity of love that you feel when you realize you want to be with someone is gone for me. Now I have the bad memories and the scars. Love won't be as "pure" for me now if that makes sense. I will always be suspicious, and maybe even hard up to love again. I will have emotional scars. You, on the other hand, will not. You should consider yourself lucky you haven't experienced the terrible feeling of a relationship ending. You will have your time, and hopefully you won't have to go through so much heartache as many of us on LS have been through. Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted May 13, 2005 Share Posted May 13, 2005 Hadn't I tried online dating, I would've never gotten out with anyone after my divorce. You should meet as many people as you can (you never know who has a nice female friend) and go to all kinds of places where you can meet people. The looks is not the factor number one for dating. The assertiveness, charm, and energy is what attracts girls. You should be talkative, spontaneous, smiling, and full of respect toward women. Link to post Share on other sites
Author L_and_P21 Posted May 13, 2005 Author Share Posted May 13, 2005 im not that good of a small talker, i can do it with my friends but it just seems so awkward small talking to others. i am the most spontanious person i know, dont know if thats good or bad. smiling is where i have trouble, im usually always happy but i just never feel like smiling. finally my respect for women is through the roof. i think my biggest problem though is my sarcasm. people dont get it, not even my family, my best friend is the only that does. the few things i have going for me stated by 2 of my friends that are girls is 1) im a good listener, i would rather listen then talk and 2) im a big romantic. ive had a friend that told me i need to dress better to get the girls but i say you dont succeed unless you are yourself and if i have to dress better to get a girl then that is one shallow girl i dont want. i just want to be myself to get a girl not someone else. thats cool that you like online dating but its just not my style. i need to physically meet them cause its too easy for people to lie i think along with my sarcasm, when i meet a girl i can find something i dont like about her and i can tell my self over and over again why thats the reason why i shouldnt advance. i dont meet girls all that often and when i do thats what usually happens. im out to find the perfect girl that doesnt exist Link to post Share on other sites
Author L_and_P21 Posted May 13, 2005 Author Share Posted May 13, 2005 i kinda know what its like to be in a break up cause i was in the middle of my best friends. they suck but every relationship has a 50% chance of lasting, usually that percentage declines rapidly, i mean we cant all have a Tapanga Link to post Share on other sites
erika2610 Posted May 13, 2005 Share Posted May 13, 2005 But online dating is good if you're a shy or quiet person.. you can open up alot easier, and you might be more comfortable. It's not as bad as you might think. And I think maybe your standards are a little too high? As far as dressing.. girls don't only look at the way you dress if they're shallow. Don't you look at the way a girl dresses at all? And lastly.. try smiling. People always look better when they smile. Link to post Share on other sites
XNemesisX Posted May 13, 2005 Share Posted May 13, 2005 Yeah after reading what you just wrote, I would say your standards are too high. No one is going to be perfect. Link to post Share on other sites
cleoelliptical Posted May 23, 2005 Share Posted May 23, 2005 Be upfront, ask girls out...consider what they would like to do, and do it. Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted May 23, 2005 Share Posted May 23, 2005 Originally posted by L_and_P21 im out to find the perfect girl that doesnt exist You won't find her online... or anywhere. Ever heard of college? Lot of girls there, girls of all flavors. Link to post Share on other sites
outdated Posted June 23, 2005 Share Posted June 23, 2005 Originally posted by L_and_P21 ive had a friend that told me i need to dress better to get the girls but i say you dont succeed unless you are yourself and if i have to dress better to get a girl then that is one shallow girl i dont want. i just want to be myself to get a girl not someone else. I'm sorry to say this, but your friend is right. Unless you plan on meeting a girl in line at a soup kitchen, you need to dress the part. Dress for success, my friend. You can still be you without wearing garbage bags. Does your friend date? If he does than you might heed some of his advice. It doesn't mean you're shallow, it shows to people that you care about how you look and there's nothing wrong with that. You should be yourself, but your question was will I succeed in ever getting a girlfriend- but you followed up with "i say you don't succeed unless you are yourself." Don't change, just upgrade, because being the current you isn't working with the ladies. Improve your inside, as well as your outside and I'm sure someone will take notice. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted June 23, 2005 Share Posted June 23, 2005 and if i have to dress better to get a girl Depends how you dress. If you dress like a slob in dirty sloppy clothes, then your message to the world is 'I don't care much about myself' which means you'll neglect a gf as much or more as you neglect yourself. And what you call 'sarcasm' may be thinly veiled hostility, which is not attractive. As for smiling, do it anyway. Science has shown that it actually makes you feel better. Nobody wants to hang with a gloomy person so if you always look unhappy, don't expect people to flock to you. Link to post Share on other sites
sdafsadf Posted June 25, 2005 Share Posted June 25, 2005 i have similar problem but my problem is not love i am insensitive i don't know why, my problem is i'm extremely horny but im too scared to go with prostitutes coz of stds and stuff, and i don't have no clue how to get clean attractive women in bed. i never kissed a girl b4 either im 19. i know my attitude is wrong but i cant help my thoughts! i just want to have sex with a attractive woman not riddled with stds and not fat. is it so much to ask for a human? Link to post Share on other sites
mizraim Posted June 25, 2005 Share Posted June 25, 2005 Originally posted by westernxer Ever heard of college? Lot of girls there, girls of all flavors. you got me that one! Link to post Share on other sites
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