hotpotato Posted September 19, 2015 Share Posted September 19, 2015 Bronze Right, and men have to be worried whether or not they are coming off as stalkerish or creepy. As women do as well... Link to post Share on other sites
Rejected Rosebud Posted September 19, 2015 Share Posted September 19, 2015 I mean, if a movie came out about a female 40 year old virgin, would people even go see it? LOL Oh well, we have a trope like that for women. It's called "OLD MAID," "SPINSTER," and other nice terms. A woman nobody wanted who is now over the hill. This trope appears in alot of movies, google it in case you're interested. (hahaha that's a joke) The secret key is to make the most of your life and focus on the good you can do and experience without being a negative nancy about it, nobody who embraces self pity is making the most of their life and definitely is making themselves unattractive to other people along the way. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TouchedByViolet Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 I disagree with the OP. Volunteering will add value and happiness to your life but won't fill the relationship void. These are two totally different things. Link to post Share on other sites
bluefeather Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 I disagree with the OP. Volunteering will add value and happiness to your life but won't fill the relationship void. These are two totally different things. Did you read the rest of the thread? Cuz that's been said before.. like a hundred times. Link to post Share on other sites
Charlie Harper Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 Be yourself, even if you are count Dracula there will be someone out there for you, never NEVER put any kind of preconceived notions on others such as (tall, nice, white, asian, big eyes. nice body, etc etc), you could meet the most fantastic person and she might be 30 pounds overweight, that is not important, what is important is Be yourself learn to appreciate others and be genuinely trying to learn about others, that will make wonders when dating, meeting people, seeing old friends, on the job etc... its general lesson for life, learn to appreciate others whatever their character might be. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
LookAtThisPOst Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 As women do as well... Um...hardly. Link to post Share on other sites
hotpotato Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 Um...hardly. I beg to differ. So I call a guy 20x and text him all day, he won't think I'm creepy? Riiight, as though women can do anything and get away with it... I've actually been called "weird" as have other women here on ls. Link to post Share on other sites
LookAtThisPOst Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 I beg to differ. So I call a guy 20x and text him all day, he won't think I'm creepy? Riiight, as though women can do anything and get away with it... I've actually been called "weird" as have other women here on ls. Well, you and them are in the minority. It's kind of a double standard. Like if a woman gets violent with her boyfriend, the cops don't take it seriously as opposed to the other way around. The consequences of getting in trouble with the law does not compare. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 Bronze Right, and men have to be worried whether or not they are coming off as stalkerish or creepy. Neither men nor women have to worry about such things. Most people are just themselves, understanding that some will find them creepy/weird/off putting at times while others will like them as they are. I know that's true for me. Can't please everyone, so why try? Others, like the OP, figure out that focusing on other sources of self-fulfillment is preferable and satisfying. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
hotpotato Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 Well, you and them are in the minority. It's kind of a double standard. Like if a woman gets violent with her boyfriend, the cops don't take it seriously as opposed to the other way around. The consequences of getting in trouble with the law does not compare. Exactly how many dudes want a woman who is creepy anyway? lol I hate to break it to you, but women can have problems dating. Sometimes women even get dumped. Women can be creepy, you name it. Having a vjay doesn't exempt one from having dating issues. A lot of women have issues in dating, like men lying to get in their pants. Link to post Share on other sites
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 And I hardly ever hear women complaining about having problems getting the guy, or getting a boyfriend, probably because they are not expected to be the initiators 3 Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 And I hardly ever hear women complaining about having problems getting the guy, or getting a boyfriend, probably because they are not expected to be the initiators It's because women are more content being single, compared to men. Link to post Share on other sites
Rejected Rosebud Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 Well, you and them are in the minority. It's kind of a double standard. What is the MOST FAMOUS trope of an obsessive stalker in American culture? Why the bunny boiler of Fatal Attraction, of course! Before that was Play Misty For Me. Ever hear the term "stage five clinger" or "the stages of clinger"? These are all about GIRLS. There is plenty of cultural memes to bolster the fear of creepy obsessive women. Link to post Share on other sites
Rejected Rosebud Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 Neither men nor women have to worry about such things. Most people are just themselves, understanding that some will find them creepy/weird/off putting at times while others will like them as they are. I'm getting the feeling that the guys here who talk about how they "have to worry" about coming off creepy ... might have a reason to worry about it. If people think you are creepy you might want to take a look at yourself. There are a bazillion people all over the earth who are not worried about whether they are coming off as stalkerish or creepy. Because they just AREN'T 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Rejected Rosebud Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 It's because women are more content being single, compared to men. I never thought this before coming to LoveShack but maybe there are more complaining men than women on the Internet?? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 (edited) I never thought this before coming to LoveShack but maybe there are more complaining men than women on the Internet?? It is unique to the internet.... I know many women,IRL, who complain...their main beef isnt that they cant attract a man(most, if not all can attract men). Its just that there aren't any quality men out there...or that they are "all taken"... The thing is that its true.., there are guys I know that are fully capable and free to have a relationship, but they simply cant find a woman that will touch them.... Its much harder for these guys as opposed to their female counterparts...Id give my reason why,but its going to come across as sexist so Ill just leave it at that... TFY Edited September 20, 2015 by thefooloftheyear 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Imajerk17 Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 (edited) It is unique to the internet.... I know many women,IRL, who complain...their main beef isnt that they cant attract a man(most, if not all can attract men). Its just that there aren't any quality men out there...or that they are "all taken"... The thing is that its true.., there are guys I know that are fully capable and free to have a relationship, but they simply cant find a woman that will touch them.... Its much harder for these guys as opposed to their female counterparts...Id give my reason why,but its going to come across as sexist so Ill just leave it at that... TFY I will bite on this. As discussed on here before, the Mating Dance goes a certain way. Early on, the man's steps tend to involve more of the "heavy lifting" so to speak. Not only is it on us to take initiative, but it is also on us to make the woman feel comfortable and steer the interaction towards her feeling connection and attraction. The mating dance becomes far more even after that. In fact, it is the woman who gives birth and who is the one who bares the physical risk of pregnancy when the relationship goes further. So she hopes the guy who effectively took her through the first few steps of the Mating Dance (which often is more about masculinity/confidence and social skill than "being a stand-up guy") is a good guy who wants a commitment. Anyway, this explains the threads we see on these forums. The males here tend to be unable to do their first few steps of the Mating Dance and get a woman attracted to them. So they come on here and gripe about that. It's a huge problem on here. The women who post with their issues on here DO tend to be able to get initial attraction, but the men they get involved with turn out to be no good for them or not be interested in a relationship. So to sum up, males tend to have dating problems early on, whereas women's dating problems tend to be further down the road. I used "tend to" a lot because there are many exceptions. ******** HOWEVER, this is indeed Off-Topic. I think JuneJulySeptember's point was about getting your mind off your own problems (dating but could be more general) by thinking of the welfare of others. And it is a good one. Edited September 20, 2015 by Imajerk17 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted September 21, 2015 Share Posted September 21, 2015 It's because women are more content being single, compared to men. And men who don't get laid, don't have girlfriends are seen as less of men in society, but ya I hardly ever hear of women who are 25+ and 30+ years of age who have never had a boyfriend or still a virgin meanwhile it's not uncommon to hear of men those ages that are in that situation 3 Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted September 21, 2015 Share Posted September 21, 2015 A lot of women have issues in dating, like men lying to get in their pants. Not to minimize it and I know it sucks for most women, but you would be very surprised at the percentage of guys who would be absolutely thrilled that a woman lied to get in their pants....And would never/ever complain about it.. Its all about whats important... Men and women can both have dating problems for sure...But at least just about all women can go to the plate and take their swings...Many guys never get to leave the bench....Which would you prefer? TFY 1 Link to post Share on other sites
hotpotato Posted September 21, 2015 Share Posted September 21, 2015 Not to minimize it and I know it sucks for most women, but you would be very surprised at the percentage of guys who would be absolutely thrilled that a woman lied to get in their pants....And would never/ever complain about it.. Its all about whats important... Men and women can both have dating problems for sure...But at least just about all women can go to the plate and take their swings...Many guys never get to leave the bench....Which would you prefer? TFY Not that anyone would have to lie to get into a mans pants Many women like to be valued for things other than their sex organs. I think theres a thread about this, there are girls who dont nake it to the plate either, if by plate you mean dating/having a partner. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ltjg45 Posted September 21, 2015 Share Posted September 21, 2015 (edited) Men and women can both have dating problems for sure...But at least just about all women can go to the plate and take their swings...Many guys never get to leave the bench....Which would you prefer? Honestly, while logically, the women's choices sound better, it doesn't help their chances of finding and keeping a meaningful relationship. That is like saying that a backup QB should be grateful to actually go in the game and play football.....but if the results that come from him playing turned to him getting sacked 5 times, throw 2 interceptions, risk getting injured, and helped give the opposing team an effortless win, does that REALLY is better than that same player staying on the bench? Women may get more opportunities to find a male partner but it doesn't make their chances any better if all of their prospects is horrible. As a guy, I rather have no prospects than 10 different terrible ones with no decent ones in sight. I am, at the least, grateful for that choice as a man. I do understand and sympathize with the women here. This is why when I do communicate with whatever woman that interest me, I am not doing it just for fun or amusement. I would hate it myself if that would happen to me. Edited September 21, 2015 by ltjg45 1 Link to post Share on other sites
LostOne1 Posted September 21, 2015 Share Posted September 21, 2015 It's because women are more content being single, compared to men. I have to disagree there.. most women I know are in their 30's and are always whining about not being able to find a guy.... their timer is ticking down I suppose. I share more of my experiences at Home - K3N's Relationship Advice Link to post Share on other sites
Frank2thepoint Posted September 21, 2015 Share Posted September 21, 2015 So I call a guy 20x and text him all day, he won't think I'm creepy? Riiight, as though women can do anything and get away with it... I've actually been called "weird" as have other women here on ls. I would find a woman annoying if she were to text me 20x per day if it was just random texts. If it's part of a conversation I'm having with her, then no she wouldn't be creepy or weird for it. Link to post Share on other sites
MGX Posted September 21, 2015 Share Posted September 21, 2015 Honestly, while logically, the women's choices sound better, it doesn't help their chances of finding and keeping a meaningful relationship. That is like saying that a backup QB should be grateful to actually go in the game and play football.....but if the results that come from him playing turned to him getting sacked 5 times, throw 2 interceptions, risk getting injured, and helped give the opposing team an effortless win, does that REALLY is better than that same player staying on the bench? Successful or not, at least that quarterback gets to actually play in the game. Link to post Share on other sites
ltjg45 Posted September 21, 2015 Share Posted September 21, 2015 Successful or not, at least that quarterback gets to actually play in the game. That is true provided that the QB is happy just to play the game. That would be equal to women being happy just getting make attention. I am sure the women that wants more than just getting male attention woukd not be satisfied by just this....just like how Tom Brady wouldn't be happy playing football despite losing constantly. Link to post Share on other sites
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