Rosie53 Posted September 6, 2015 Share Posted September 6, 2015 My boyfriend of 1yr. has a close female friend. He said she is his moms best friend, (she is 10 yrs older than him) and has known him since he was a kid, she is "like an Aunt" to him. I recently found out, that over the last 3yrs, up till a few months ago, they were so close, that they would lie next to each other in bed, (fully clothed) while she shows him how to install apps on his tablet, how to use his laptop etc.... ( he was not tech savvy at all). He has a bad back and cannot sit upright for a long period of time, he needs to recline or lie down. I also found out that a yr before he met me he was really drunk one night and they had sex. He said it was a one time thing, never happened again, but they have remained close friends. I told him I didn't think it was appropriate for them to behave like this, (lie next to each other in bed, while doing tech stuff on the tablet) since they had a sexual past and we are in a relationship, they should not be doing this now. He said I was making a big deal out of nothing. So I asked is it ok if I had a close male friend, who I had sex w/one time, and we laid next to each other and made sexual innuendos to each other, (like they sometimes did) That made him see it differently!! He did put an end to the friendship. Last night we argued about it again. He said I made a big deal out of it, I think I was right. What do you think??? Why do people do stupid things, then when you react, You're the psycho?????!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted September 6, 2015 Share Posted September 6, 2015 (edited) I think I was right. What do you think??? You can be right and be alone. Now that he's with you, his romps with auntie need to end. If you can forgive him this and move on, then do so. If you can't, then cut him loose. It's really not worth the raised blood pressure. Why do people do stupid things, then when you react, You're the psycho?????!!!! Define "react" as it relates to the adjective "psycho". Why would someone reach for that term to buttress a description of a reaction? Edited September 7, 2015 by kendahke Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted September 7, 2015 Share Posted September 7, 2015 He did put an end to the friendship. Last night we argued about it again. If he ended the friendship, what is there left to argue about? He said I made a big deal out of it You did. And he ended it, right? What do you think??? I think I have been in the same place as your boyfriend and if you really trusted him, you would not have made a big deal out of it. Link to post Share on other sites
Winterina Posted September 7, 2015 Share Posted September 7, 2015 Rosie, you are right about the boundaries. Nothing good can come out of your bf sharing bed with a woman whom he is so close to and whom he had sex with. Your reaction is normal. Your bf's friendship under those conditions would be hard to handle for most of the women. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rosie53 Posted September 7, 2015 Author Share Posted September 7, 2015 Thanks Winterina!! your response makes perfect sense!! Link to post Share on other sites
Lois_Griffin Posted September 7, 2015 Share Posted September 7, 2015 My boyfriend of 1yr. has a close female friend. He said she is his moms best friend, (she is 10 yrs older than him) and has known him since he was a kid, she is "like an Aunt" to him. I recently found out, that over the last 3yrs, up till a few months ago, they were so close, that they would lie next to each other in bed, (fully clothed) while she shows him how to install apps on his tablet, how to use his laptop etc.... ( he was not tech savvy at all). He has a bad back and cannot sit upright for a long period of time, he needs to recline or lie down. I also found out that a yr before he met me he was really drunk one night and they had sex. He said it was a one time thing, never happened again, but they have remained close friends. I told him I didn't think it was appropriate for them to behave like this, (lie next to each other in bed, while doing tech stuff on the tablet) since they had a sexual past and we are in a relationship, they should not be doing this now. He said I was making a big deal out of nothing. So I asked is it ok if I had a close male friend, who I had sex w/one time, and we laid next to each other and made sexual innuendos to each other, (like they sometimes did) That made him see it differently!! He did put an end to the friendship. Last night we argued about it again. He said I made a big deal out of it, I think I was right. What do you think??? Why do people do stupid things, then when you react, You're the psycho?????!!!! That whole thing just has such an 'ick' factor. She sounds like a real class act, chasing after her supposed best friend's son. Age is irrelevant here - it's the fact that she's a pig and disrespected her 'best friend' in every possible way. He's a lying sack claiming she's 'like an aunt' to him. He was loving the sexual dynamic and the possibility that he'd have sex with her again and he damn well knows it. He's just angry that you took away his fun. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted September 7, 2015 Share Posted September 7, 2015 I wouldn't date someone that had Mrs. Robinson as a close friend/cuddle bitch/ONS. Your BF has mommy issues, and yes that has the ick factor all over it. I agree he is upset because you are calling him out it on how inappropriate their relationship is. He's the one who is the nut job not you. Can you say "DEAL BREAKER" Link to post Share on other sites
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